Why can't I trust these feelings?
That everything will be fine?
Why can't I hope that things will for once work out?
I know I'm childish,
to hold onto the ground when I could be soaring in the air,
but I need a safety net.
I need to make sure that I won't get hurt.
I've tasted unrequited love once before,
and oh how bittersweet it was.
It followed me for years,
and only now has faded.
So please allow me to keep this secret,
to not let the flames ignite.
Once that happens,
all stability will be lost.

It's a disease,
and I suppose I've caught it.
No doctor can heal it,
no shot could hope to destroy it.
It's not contagious,
it's just dangerous.
It's playing with fire,
when you know you could get hurt.
Or Jumping from a tree,
when you know you could get injured.
It's a risk,
and I've taken one too many.
I play it safe,
Hold onto this disease,
and let no one know that it has me in it's clutches.

My chest grows tight,
not of fear ... well maybe a little,
but mostly of joy,
an unending pooling of emotions.
Mixed in a little joy, a little regret, and some unsureness.
So many others follow suit.
I want to talk a walk,
to do something and anything to give my mind release,
but wherever I go my thoughts follow me.
I can't escape these feelings,
not even in order to get a grip of what they may mean.
Or how I truely feel.

They say time is a river.
Washing over you,
cleansing you from past tormentors.
I never believed this.
That these problems could just disappear.
It's not as if they just vanished,
I just don't care as much about back then.
It's finally in my past.
The river has helped old woulds to heal,
and made room for new possibilities.
I had never believed time could heal these tears,
But somehow ... it did.

She's so unsure.
She's not used to these sort of things.
Having them all piled on her last minute,
with little time in between.
It's not as if they were unthoguhtful,
or wanted to cause her such a headache.
Life just played out the way it will.
One daughter giving one tidbit of news,
the other another.
There's no need for surprise from her reaction ...
It was expected.
But can't she put some trust in us?

Look! Over there!
Can't you see him?
That shadowy figure.
He catches your glance every now and then,
Smiles smugly and then stares.
What? You say you can't see him?
That you don't know what I'm talking about?
Well to be honest, I can't see him either.
But she says he's there.
He whisper's words during class,
making it hard to concentrate.
He tells you all that your worth:
nothing. You have no value.
That you need him to survive.
That your lost without him.
Look at your family, everyone you love.
Oh don't worry,
he only threatened to **** them a little.
stop doing this you scream,
stabbing holes into the walls,
as if this could stop him.
They can't see him,
no one can .... except you.
A smile spreads across his face,
"You belong to me, and only me."