You called out of the blue.
I couldn't believe that it was you. 
But the caller i.d. said your name.
You had dismissed my presence for so long that I was in awe.

You asked to come over.
I let you in.
I couldn't believe my eyes.
All the feelings I had for you starting rushing back in like they were a river pouring through me.

We starred at each other reminiscing on our memories together.
The connection that had always held us up was there,
It was as clear as the sky and both of us could see it.
Maybe it had never really left.

I could see in your eyes that it was taking everything in you to not lean forward and kiss me.
The ****** tension started rising up in both of us.
My head was screaming yes.
But my heart was shaking no.
I had been unconsciously waiting for this moment for as long as I could remember. 

So I gave in.
I went with my head.
As soon as I knew it we were lying in my bed and you were outlining my body with your hands.
I craved your touch.
You were the happiest I had ever seen you,
You always were when we were together.
I wanted to stop time and live in this moment forever.

Even though this moment was perfect,
Everything in me knew I should say no and screamed that this was a bad idea,
But I was too happy to listen to anything besides his breath.
He was everything I wanted.

I could see he was falling back inlove with me.
We both were.
It was scaring the **** out of us.
Right when he realized his feelings he pulled as fast as he could away.

He thought we could just use each other to fill the gap of loneliness.
But nothing ever goes as planned, with us.

He finally left and I was then stranded with my feelings,
All over again.

As the light turned to dark,
You were there.
You shielded me from the pain that was trying to tare me apart.
You held me up when I didn't know how too.

I lived on your chest.
It was the only place that i felt safe. Everyday we searched for the invisible bond we both dreamed of.
We thrived for the connection that would move our relationship further,
But neither of us could find it.

So we stopped living in each others arms.
Safety wasn't enough.
We had to learn how to live without one another.
Neither of us wanted to say goodbye.
But our paths were going different ways and neither of us will have the connection we're dying for,
If we stay together.
So we only live in each others memories.

You are my soulmate. 
Everyday You keep me sane.
You teach me how to be a better person.
Everything you are is what i lack and desire to be.
I'm envious of your loyalty to your word and to the people that you care about, your kindness and compassion for everyone around you , your integrity to think everything through and make sure everything you do is/was the right decision, and your honesty to yourself.

And even though you are moving on to your next chapter in your life soon, what has kept our friendship so strong and what will keep us close for a long time is always being able to have one an other and truly know and understand each other and accept each other for everything that we are, and having that equal balance of give it take, and knowing that no matter what we are there for each other and would do anything for one an other.


And Even though you won't be able to have the people you love in your next chapter, I know for a fact that you will be right at home in Utah, it will feel right and you'll be happy.

But I can also guarantee you that there'll be bumps in the road but I know with everything in me that you will be ok and will get through them because you always make the right decisions for yourself and because you have a good head on your shoulder and you know yourself more than anyone else. 

And no matter what pulls us apart, our friendship and our memories will keep us together.