Anna-Lynn

Anna-Lynn Apr 2013

Heartless creatures crawl out of my mouth when I'm around you.

They scream and shout cruel words that slap you in the face.

I try to cover them with my cupped hands, but they always seem to find their way out.

I hate that these cruel monsters hurt you the way they do, but I guess they're just letting you know how much it hurt me.

How much it hurt me to look into your eyes and see only her.

How much it hurt to touch your soft golden skin and know I am not the only one who has felt this pleasure.

How much it hurts to have a heart that only beats for you.

How much it hurts to be human.

Anna-Lynn Mar 2013

Tango of lies

We danced that exhausting tango.
That tango of lies.
Wrapped up in deceit, spinning in ecstasy.
My feet no longer able to bear the weight.
I crumbled with the belief that you would be there to catch me.

Was I ever wrong.

Anna-Lynn Mar 2013

The Summer High

I came here to forget myself for but a few short hours.

The lake is as green as it had ever been, the rocks covered in algae and darkened by the cold and calm water.

My feet dangling off the edge of the dock, my toes just barely grazing the surface.

My body had been transformed into this bronzed beauty, my long golden hair at least two shades lighter.

Summer always changed me.

The bright orange setting sun seeping into my pores.

My lungs taking in every last minute of it.

Soon this will be gone.

Sleeping all fall and drowning all winter.

I don't want to go back. I don't want to be me again.

I want to stay in this summer state, and stay up all night with nothing but fireflies and full moons.

The sun goes down, and I stay until I feel a chill.

Walking away from the last summer memory, I close my eyes and wish for just another week.

Just one more chance to be someone else.

Just one more chance to forget about...

me.

Anna-Lynn Mar 2013

Stuck

I followed the rabbit of despiration down the contradictory hole.
It lead me to believe I could have anything.
But what if what I wanted had no name.
What if what I needed came in the form of a still beating heart.
My flesh was crawling with want. Lust. Desire.
I needed it. I wanted it.
Hopeless and weary, I craved it in an ugly and filthy fashion.
My bones ached for the touch of something real. Something that could feel.
I was ripped of comfort and replaced it with grit.
**** out the pure and pour in the damage.
I don't want to leave.
I can't.
I'm stuck.
*Simply, stuck.

Anna-Lynn Mar 2013

Epiphany

I think, just maybe, I had an epiphany.

I think I want this
I think I want all of whatever this could be.
I think I want you
I think I want us
I think this epiphany could be our destiny.

Anna-Lynn Mar 2013

My kind of sickness

I don't know how you do it.
Everytime I'm around you, I seem to get these symptoms.
Like a bandit in the night, you steal my breath and cast a spell over my shielded heart, breaking the barrier.
My toes curl when you make your presence known.
I bite my bottom lip, and and my poor unprotected heart beats uncontrollably.
I don't know how you do it.
My cheeks flush, and my stomach boils with pleasure when you push back your shaggy blonde hair.
My voice gets stuck between my teeth when you glide towards me.
I can't help but smile when I stare into your saphire eyes.
I don't know how you do it, but I don't want these symptoms to disappear.
If this sickness is love, I never want to be cured.

Anna-Lynn Mar 2013

My deepest regret

I make promises I don't keep and tell stories that never happened.
I lie to you eye to eye, so I don't have to **** you with the truth.
I've made so many mistakes and regret more of my life than I've ever lived. I can't remember the last time I loved another because it has always been you and I.
I tried to fill that gap with body after body, but somehow it just made things worse.

I have the face of an angel but the heart of a monster.
I don't belong here anymore.
I feel misplaced.
I feel forgotten.
I am my deepest regret, and you were supposed to be my forever.