Im shivering. ******* cold, again. Insomnia and two hundred dollars In meds that don't even ******* help. It's no wonder why I'm sick When my body and mind rejects anything That's set firmly in reality.
I wish I could sleep Through trauma. Go into shock Like the tv talks about. Repress reality Like how I dealt with the past. Anything really Just to forget sound And sensation.
I puff on my inhaler For the sixth time today And listen to the real person Sewed against my shadow feet. She's crying, spilling secrets Behind cheap wine Her stories break my heart They were what I knew But wished No one would say aloud.
My father likes to text me When he's all ****** up. He likes to blame me And tell me I'm just Trash. That he wishes I was dead. That I did this to myself To take it out on him. I smile now. And silence my phone.