One day, they'll wake up next to you and look toward you. You'll roll over, all bleary-eyed and drowsy. With your raspy, honey thick voice, you'll mumble good morning into their neck, tell them you love them. You'll run your fingers over their jaw line, lean in to kiss them, and see the hesitation in their eyes. Suddenly, you are wide awake and you question, and your heart races in the most awful way, because somewhere, deep in you, you already know. They can't even meet your eye when they say "We need to talk". And they tell you things that you hadn't even been aware were problems and they say they're sorry, but you know, in your heart of hearts, they're not, really. That's when you realize that everything you thought 'This' was between you was Real for you but Not for them. You realize that they were pretending. You realize you've been used. And then they are getting out of bed and putting on their pants and leaving. The sound of the door clicking shut with everything you thought you had on the wrong side of the door; The sound of the lock finding itself and clicking into place is the exact sound your heart made when it broke.
I've been going through old journals lately. Throwing out parts of me I don't want anymore. Keeping things I forgot I had.
This is one of them.