i've bent backwards until my face smashed into the dirt.
i've pulled my own teeth, gathering the blood into my palms.
and i've said it, i wrote it, i screamed it.
give me. give me. just give me.
your empty space sends me into walls.
your wordless dialogue causes rivers.
what now, darling?
i would burn my hair, kiss heart-shaped bruises.
give me. give me. just give me.
you've squirmed into my veins, an uncomfortable parasite.
forgive me or leave me.
i will run to you, but i cannot pretend.
it's not for sale.
i'm sorry, darling.
....but give me. give me.
just give me.

this frayed skin has been shed
caterpillar shattering cocoon.
greens, golds, purples, drench the air.
honey kissed lashes, lips full of fire.
prowl the grass, footprints engraved.
see the water. the moon and stars that coincide.
slip into the summer skin, with the golden tan that
sizzles with freedom.
place the summer glasses over your eyes, the ones that
sparkle and dance. place your other self into a dark and cool place.
now.now.now.
frolic. taste. feel. see. smell. cherish.
the sun blinds, yellow rays that penetrate.
the trees hum, birthing life and letting go.
place yourself inside, let the roots ****** you, the sky eat you
and the world embrace you.
slip into the summer skin,
and run. run. run.

i want to dissolve on your tongue.
i want to squeeze into your blood stream.
i want to lay between your ribs, place your beating heart
upon my cheek.
i want to soak into the sweat upon your collarbone.
i want to travel the freckles on your nose.
i want to place myself upon the lines of your lips.
i want to tattoo myself on your skin.
i want to swim in your eyes, facing the storm
with no shelter.
i want. i want. i want. to disappear with you.
into the stars. the inky blackness.
where i have all of you,
you have all of me.

before i fall asleep...especially then.
my mind roams and roams,
but always back. back. to you.
i feel the fire in my throat, the ashes in my belly.
all i want to do is scream.
i thought you were real, i wish you weren't.
it wouldn't hurt so much, if you were just a fragment
of the imagination.
but unfortunately, your kisses did burn. your tongue
was the sweetest. your ***** were my monsters,
eating every part of me.
your eyes drove me insane.
all i can see is a storm.
all i can see is a sea.
all i can see is a explosion.
and there's always the two of us.
i am drowning, drowning, drowning.
and you are above the water,
smiling. smiling. smiling. at me.
the water enters my lungs. unconsciousness swells into me.
you smile. my fingertips graze the air.
i feel the sun. you place your hand upon my hair.
you kiss it. and drag me.
down. down. down.
i will never feel the sun again.

you've taken one year of my life
(i'd even say the best)
so place it in a big enough box, with too much shiny paper
lots of ribbons or some sort of thread. make sure you tie it in a bow.
put stickers on it. cute ones. random ones.
make sure it captures your storm.
place it in a corner. place it on your bed.
you just need to see it.
(always)
i hope when you open it (if you do)
you'll hear my dumb laugh,
you'll see my eyes that you said were the most beautiful,
you'll try to remember the taste of my breath,
you'll long to feel the curve of my hips,
you'll yearn for my fragility.
when you leave
(i know you will)
you'll have nothing but this box full of memories,
you've taken everything else.
so take one more,
it's yours, anyway.

we are not the same
(in practically every way)
i dark, by birth and sun,
you refuse to step outside.
i yearn for the opposite ***,
you hold your breath.
i, restless, always ready for adventure,
you, scared by the potential of the day.
i indulge.
you judge.
i don't pull,
(although i want to)
you don't scold
(but you desire to)
opposites attract, or something among those lines.
too much opposite for me.
you whine at the nearest task,
i mumble, but trudge along.

friends. best friends.
(but with a warning label attached)

i wish i could wear your love around me,
a silver chain hung on my collarbone.
your familiar breath tickling,
your tongue searching.
close. close. close.
to the angry and pounding blood vessels.
if i had all your love, safely and securely
in a little box tied with a million strings,
i wouldn't worry about your love finding new vessels,
new mouths.
i wouldn't think of her thighs shuddering.
i wouldn't believe your eyes gazing upon another.
i wouldn't have to fear her taking your love,
for i would have it with me.
the cool clink of silver nestled comfortably on me,
no room for wander,
for question.
your love upon me,
i wish.