Amber Rose: Poems

Amber Rose Feb 2014

Whirlwind words spun by
miss Meddler threading my life
like a knitted benvolent blanket.
A rush of excitement, all in the moment
Not really comprehending the extent
of your less than marvellous meddling
and my feet dangled at the veneer.
A zenith, a choice finally offered
but not wanted nor desired.

Cadbury's Roses

Amber Rose Dec 2013

Cadbury's Roses

Just like the recent change of the emerald favorite to the bitter taste of coffee,
the battering gale force winds hammering on the door,
as it screeches to be let in, as it wails of its sorrow.
Reminiscent of the innate excitement of the jiggle of bells,
and half eaten carrots and an emptied glass of whiskey
the passing of casserole dishes full to the brim to borrow.
Knocks on the door loud and swift
kettle boiling and the offering of chocolate sweets all wrapped up in their shiny rainbow wrappings,
Nothing but good wishes and hope for the New Year.
But, what of last years resolutions?
The faded floral wallpaper is still peeling, and cuts that wounded just down to the marrow have not healed.
A ****** bandaged seeping fear.
Change you arrive when planned or as unexpected as the snow in Summer.
You tap on our windows,or you blast through the panes like dynamite
Exploding.Damaging. Injuring.
In a split second you find yourself cracking open a rounded blue tin
to discover a surprise,a green coffee sweet
for better or for worse in this small little ways the world changing.
Changing.

Isolated Island

Amber Rose Jul 2014

Isolated Island

It's all too crowded,
The breaths in the room.
Cornered.Surrounded.
Lost,Hand of mystique shrouded in gloom.
Can you hear the drops?
diamonds clink and bounce
frozen tears-fatal-to stop,
and bleed the unwound-able in one fell swoop.
Tragedy that the height you fell from was meteoric,
A skyscraper length until you hit the ground.
A tossed doll,broken, pre-loved
Agonised tortured scream that made without a sound.
No longer a fallen angel when you keep treading
the waves of murky water.
Can't you delve into the depths of my soul and read the
depleting resources that are farther-
from where you are.
Isolated Island,find your way home.
But breadcrumbs can float,
if all the lights are extinguished and you find yourself alone.
Darling,don't you notice I'm dying,
Each day you stay growing in the shade,
The more nutrients that are shielded from me
I am overburdened with pain.
Smile,it might surprise you
Laugh it may caress you
Live, with or without me
just live in that rare beauty.

Linger

Amber Rose Dec 2013

Linger

Ripped ribbons scattered aimlessly,
with fractured cups, dirt and dust
pink pearly acetone just won't be enough
to erase the evidence of you.

With forced confessions,
spilled out all past indiscretions,
and cursed vindications and blood
splattered like a musty revenge.

Blank canvases,
Hand print caresses that show
Polaroid prints all faded and jaded
like the illusion of us.

It was desperate fingers
that clung to the railings
but the force of gravity meant I had to let go.
Hope had revived me
Like water to my parched throat
my oasis is the desert
All my horrid words were revoked.

Yet nothing will ever be enough
to surgically remove
our open bleeding wounds.
I must tend to the injured,
Leave alone the wielder
Knife still in hand
How did it come to this?
I missed your voice
so much it made me cry
yet after I heard
it made everything worse
Mourning a loss that was not mine
but yours.
Grieving hurts.

I still love you
but it burns
burns
until I have to take my hand off
the all consuming flame.

My teardrops cannot pay the price,
or eradicate the past in peoples minds
Will I forever be beholden to this guilt that now defines me?
Too many skin graphs to hide the scarred tissue underneath.

All paths lead me back to here.
I'm helpless to watch your ghost
Linger,you still linger.

One day

Amber Rose Dec 2013

One day

One day, one day soon
I will fly off the handle
wash over you like a great typhoon
My threshold has been reached.

One day, and my dear it's coming
You'll be shown a map of your route
of devious destruction's and plotting
Bitter acidic words like arsenic.

One day, and it's nigh
Your past will slap you across the face
and I won't catch you when you realize
the stain ingrained in the veins of my skin.

One day, and I wish futilely that it won't arrive,
when my well has dried up and my faith is crushed
underneath years of keeping the flood behind-
me these waves will drown us.

One day, it'll be Christmas
The mascarade will thrive behind swollen stomachs
and forced smiles but listen to this
at least you'll be for one day-
well behaved.

So I'll wait for New Years day.
My New years resolution
is to eradicate the pollution building up in the chasms of my mind.
One day, one day soon.

Overdue

Amber Rose Mar 2014

Overdue

I aspired to write a masterpiece,
paint you in watercolour
I longed to freeze time,
in our little Bubble
when it was simplistic,
when all was fine.
To present you with the words of the universe
try to understand
that a girl like me could dry up any well of make believe.
So I didn't ask, I didn't delve even when I knew I should,
because I'm human,flawed and broken
like that plate you smashed palpable between us.
Ignored and neglected
these letters off my pen
and I wonder can I catch the raindrops,
and open the floodgates to wade through
my horrific beautiful mistakes.
Eccentric dear,
Your not different nor crazy not at all.
Your wonderful
Wonderful
I never told you enough.

Partisan

Amber Rose Jan 2014

Partisan

Dust specks-settle,
cosying up to the ribbon bound notebooks
bearing your initials.
Burying this artefact,
flawed, fractured there will be no map
to guide you back to this mirth, no breadcrumbs to drop on the earth.
It will be no more than a prologue, a seam unwoven to grab momentary attention
until I sweep all away with steel grip on an exuding artery.
Is Hubris not a deadly sin?
As it lays in tatters at my feet.,
Foolish, foolhardy to have believed that all was a world of Thornfield or Pemberley
more apt is naeive.
The disparate views,that were sent by you undermined by certainty,unhinged the very bolts and nuts that held my infastructure.
Transfixed. Transfigured. Transformed into this 'new'.
Alas the day, arrives anyway the lark sings a merry tune and it thunderstorms, drops leaves life leaves the dew.
To be candid, I pocess within me one last spark it splutters and at times can ignite, for teaching me an invaluble truth.
Unrequited love, This partisan
bear with caution- leaves a scar- a victim.

The Black Valley

Amber Rose Feb 2014

The Black Valley

Glorious anthesis to light,
you shone
black midnight sleep
with nothing but flickering flames and lingering embers.
You surrounded us all
like a blanket,
your maternal arms embaced us in one brief moment
like the candle flame flickering,then, flicker, then gone.
In your rustic time capsule,
you swallowed us up
an omnipresent reminder of our fragilty,our powerlessness
in the wake of your fury.
But you stopped stomping your rooted feet,
as our yellow beams returned,
as if they never were away,
yet it's a caveat perhaps?
In the midst of our mundane rountine
that made us-halt-
for awhile
we took a step back,slowed down,stilled
to just be.
Just be.

— The End —