I'm trying to stop,
Hiding behind insecurities,
And living between two families,
But saying good bye,
And changing my ways,
Is a scary thought that makes me cry,
Not from actual fright,
But from an over powering anxiety,
I wish it'd just go away,
Leave me alone,
(NOT FINISHED)

once so close,
now apart,
separated by a sea of people.

Clinging to the past,
a memory if i may,
thinking of what we could have made last,
dwelling on what we used to say.

Standing in the rain,
so no one sees my tears,
trying to stay sane,
for all the approaching years.

Wishing it weren't true,
still want to stay close to you,
always try to be your friend,
trying to make these memories never end.

You build me up,
Then break me down,
Your nice to my face,
But a ***** behind my back,
You say your here to stay,
Then get up and walk away,
You say we are best friends,
But then you treat me like i'm dirt,
But over all i'm the stupid one for staying this long and putting up with all your moods, lies and plain old *******.
Now i don't give a **** what you say or think about me,
I don't care what you do,
Your not my mother and you certainly do not own me,
From now on i'm me and who I want to be,
And you can go jump in a lake if you think i'm changing for you ever again cos all it causes is hurt, pain and confusion!

as i lay awake at night,
thoughts come crawling through my mind,
thoughts of the one and only you.

some are confusing,
some are a lie,
and some are truthful in a way.

i keep our memories,
protected by my heart,
locked away,
safe in steal.

when i let you in,
i'm soon to push you away,
frightened to lose you,
careful to keep my distance,
yet long for you to stay always......

i can tell your giving up,
it's not easy for me to accept,
i know it's my fault,
i know i've changed,
i know what i gotta do to fix things.......

i'm just a child,
nothing more and nothing less,
i need you here,
now and forever,
i need my friend.....

but it's obvious you don't want to be my friend....

i'm cool with that,
just give me the chance to say bye......

i thought we were friends forever
what happened?????

soon my confusion will come to an end,
leaving me with ever lasting pain,
no understanding,
and to only be what you will leave,
a heart full of sorrow,
a girl crying on her knees.