Polaroid cameras
Trees with leaves
Mason jars of water
Adventures into oblivion
CDs
Journals with no plain pages
Studios with paint on the walls
Brick buildings
Small towns full of life

Maybe I am not suited for the life everyone wants for me
Maybe I am not the person everyone believes I am
Maybe I am not the girl people fall in love
Maybe I want so much more than what I will ever be offered
Maybe I am just trying to get through without attention
Maybe I am scared of what is to come
That it might not be what I expected or dreamed of
Maybe I don't want to live period.

If I lay here
watching the sun set,
feeling the safety of the dark
in a field of thorny roses,
maybe it will take the pain away.

My skin,
it has no color,
as pale as Luna.
You caused my blood to drain,
through my wrists,
through my legs.

Tears fade,
memories stay,
regret is awakened,
forgiveness is mistaken.

You are the thorns.
You are my murderer.

my sentences don't have an end
my body is so cold
my hands hold each other
just to stay warm

I am not the girl you knew
I am not the girl you know
I am not the girl you will know

I am a rumor everyone thinks they know
But they all have it wrong
I seem innocent and sweet
But underneath I am a pile of tears
and blood and lost dreams

One moment
Blood rushes through me
Into my finger tips
New spirits flourish
All throughout my body
Sparks leave my red hair
Leaving it burning bright
Finally I see what I have spent my whole life waiting for
This one moment
Everything makes sense
Everything is alive
And I am a part of it

I am
I am alive
I am a part
I am infinite

I stare into her shadowy eyes looking for answers
But all I find are mistakes.
Her hands are like magic when they paint.
She turns silver into red so easily
And yet no one notices she has butterflies dancing on her arms.
She hides her darkest secrets under her sleeves.
No one questions her tears because no one has seen them.
She masks herself with a smile when she's dying inside.
She wants freedom. She wants happiness.
I walk away from the mirror, put my razor down
and smile as I walk out the door as if nothing had happened.