A GLIMPSE INSIDE THE MIND OF A MANIAC

I sit alone in this lonely place.
All by myself while my mind begins to race.
And every single little problem that I've ever had,
Ricochets through my brain, just makin' me mad.
Anger and Confusion are my only friends now.
I dwell IN the moment, ON the past, asking myself how?
I mean, how did all come to this? THIS!?
Was there something that I overlooked, or something that I missed?
My thinking's straight crooked and I'm going crazy.
The only words I know at this point are "if," "or," and "maybe."
And then I finally let my head hang low.
As I try to pull myself together, asking God to let me know.
I'm steady asking Him for answers, but it's hard for me to hear.
'Cause all this evilness is overflowing, gushing out my ears.
Deaf, blind, and dumb, yeah, I'm freaking out inside.
Going a million miles a second on this hellactious, crazy ride.

I'm coming to a halt now. A different time, and different place.
I know that I'm still going nuts, but the signs aren't on my face.
Sometimes I control this car, but sometimes I let it go.
On a mountain top so very high, but at the same time, very low.
It's mentally a nightmare of the type you'll never sleep.
I'm barely hanging on to the bit of sanity I can keep.
BUT EVENTUALLY THIS RIDE WILL END, there's always that in sight.
To a "normal" person, yes that's true, but I'm blinded by the light.
I don't know at which end I'll land, or an estimated time.
It's either high or low, it's always cloudy, and the sun, it never shines.
But if it does, the moment's fleeting, and I need to be on my feet.
But I'm usually still on the ground, I'm crying and I'm weak.

This disease is real, some think it's fake, but someday I hope they know.
The disorder that's in my head tries directing my own show.
With this disease you can stay on the ground, or you can choose to fly.
But you can NEVER stop battling it until the day you die.
MARCH on my friends, march on proudly, keep fighting that good fight.
Stay humble, faithful, brave, and true, and always dodge the night.