She did her happy dance
As she walked down the stairs
And that hug was the evidence for unconditional love
Like that fight between pomegranate seed and the teeth
Love burst at the right pressure
She did her happy dance
And visioned eternity
But I don't believe in unconditional love

So right before dawn I prepared to leave
As I do every time I sense love on the horizon, rising with the sunrise

Take me with you, she said - let's run

I've been choked before - I thought

And told her I'll be going for a spin
Spider webs were colonizing my bicycle
I find freedom as the air shapes my face into a smile
I am far now, in that shed were I hid myself
And I'm not intending to return
I will be watching the sunset alone
Her eyes were intending to nail the sun
On the wall of our destiny
I speak highly of the sunset
But she insisted to capture the light
She believed in unconditional love
I believe in unconditional positive regard

Parallel to the storm
my beast of a motorcycle
paired with the sharp edged sensations
complimenting me with backfire
as the October cold meets my desire
to detour off my daily route
with a demand for an early rise

In the mirror I see a home
where I belong
where my lover is waiting with warmth
but for now
the cold is my journey
cruising with the noise of the roaring tires
the power of the horses
and the God-like cylinders demanding spark  
shaking me and my world
while they routinely
explode petrol beneath my feet

like a heartbeat
that reminds me
- I am alive

as I pass the bridge over the frozen lake
a frozen thought melts and finds a way
from my heart to my mind
that taking comfort kills me
journeys are the only reminder
that I have lived

-
Passing idea
Clusters a spark
a mundane brainstorm  
And as it passes
Through the elastic mind

I wish to sit
At my typewriter

To capture the essence
Before it’s gone
Before the idea vanishes
Before storm ceases

Mad,
Mad mind

-
Passing idea
space exploded within itself
atomic fusion instigated
The mundane universe
And it expands
Through the elastic space

I wish to sit
At my typewriter

To capture the essence
Before it’s gone
Before a black-hole
Swallows my universe
to create another one

Mad,
Mad universe

-
Passing idea
Clusters of minds
Until civilizations are fused
Into mundane cultures
And they expand
Through the elastic generations

I wish to sit
At my typewriter

To capture the essence
Before it’s gone
Before civilization zero
Is both dead and alive
In the schrodinger-like
Transition to civilization one

Mad,
Mad persons

-
Passing idea
Cluster of lonely universes
Until the almighty gravity
Loses its kingdom
To the thought of multiverses
And it expands
Through the elastic kinship

I wish to sit
At my typewriter

To capture the essence
Before it’s gone
Before multiverses wonder
And discover:
They think, therefore they are.

Mad,
Mad multiverses

-
I am sitting at my typewriter
To capture an idea
whilst thoughts are passing through my cerebral cortex
Perhaps
Someone inside an earth-like neuron in my brain
Is sitting at his typewriter
With a writer’s block
Trying to make sense of the birth of me:
His equivalent of the big bang
a single atom
Giving birth to the energy
That shaped his universe - my cerebrum   

I am sitting at my typewriter
To capture an idea
Whilst the milky-way and Andromeda
Are to cross through a string of light-like gravitational paths  
Perhaps
The conscious of the universe
Ponders my existence
In a form of a passing idea

Mad,
Mad Alireza.

where are my socks?
lost in neither sun nor sin
which door did I use to get in?
keep on telling myself
last this day
stay one more day
home is burnt, home is gone
hope is lost, hope is wrong
feels like Ive been a stranger all my life,
light down - when the night falls?
people smile,
people cry,
but they say, they're doing just fine...

I miss home, the only real image I hold
monsters are waiting by my bed side
waiting for me to push the covers aside
hearts like empty rooms
flames after smokes
this comes and go's
what did you pack my bag with mommy?
a box of candles for a city under the sea?
through it all
wherever the road will take me
I know now nothing like
love
could break me.

it's time to go
but the voice echoes
Alireza, where are your socks?

Back when
monsters would have disappeared
when the blanket was over my head


back when
time was just a concept
where "light" was not all that confident -
I had self-discipline
I knew what I wanted from this life
I had a plan
I had an ambition
A vanilla ice cream was all I wanted
A delicious collapse of sugar and ice
melting on my tongue
surfing down with the brightest of daydreams
hollow senses, all thousand and one of them
grasping each lick until I was left with only a smile
satisfaction -
Long before adaptation
Then
My mother bought me a watch
I sat.. and watched

Not that I have nothing to say
my words are meaningless in your presence

I have nothing to give
my worth is ashes around the fire,
the heat-waves around the sun
as you are the sun

I am an entity filled with desire
thousand and one desires in one
My belongings are grains of sand, washed away
at the touch of your oceanly waves
The heat of my soul, the energy in my eyes
all drained - courtesy of your coquetry

Drunken, weak, drained, and indigent
wondering if I stand a chance

silly me.

It wont be till tomorrow
Before I make up my mind
It wont be till I see the reflection of the sun
in your sweet smile
Before I choose to stay
Or walk a thousand mile

There’s comfort in this pain
There’s guilt in this prayer
Yet still I am here
singing my dearest dreams
In your ears
I am shattering my own heart
As I see my reflection
in your tears

It wont be till tomorrow
Before I make up my mind

It’s raining outside
broken hearts are no strangers
To these rainy nights

Angels watching over you
And I
I am nothing but a blank stare
Amused
Knowing that you are everything
a man could ask for
Knowing that I
will be the one who breaks you


Hardheartedly I applause
At my own misleading specious

Chasing a mirage impassively
In the distance where
no sane man laid eyes
I am looking for a being
Less astonishing than you
looking to feed my ever lasting lust

Insipidness is consuming me
or maybe intense devotion

I feel
away from my nature
the barest animalistic side of me

and you
you are judging me with those humane eyes

We became nobodies

though we started as heros

of our own stories

to be written by our small hands

brainstorming the possibilites

If only we knew

how to start the thesis


someone somewhere made us believe

this world is all into shatters

let the mirror inside your soul

give you the key to find your role

we fell so hard for this lying

we all broke, shattered trying

as we became older and older

our dreams got much smaller

and the earth caged the falcon

while the lion met the mirror

a cat was staring right back at her



the dove's happy ending arose

with the vulture's ample smile

and the vulture dies not surprised

dreaming not of high flights

Loneliness is consuming me
Solitude is the only road to salvation
For the purist
For the one who
Excruciates a life time
To die at ease
For the one who
Has an idea of happiness
evolving in a nest

Madness sheltered in order
Chaos ceased with institute
Love meant being apart
Freedom meant demerit of attitude

Free as a falcon
Flew to spread the wings
Not to reach a destination
Roamed to feel the wind
Not to discover a new dimension
Explored the darkest nights
Never let down by apprehension

I am a bad man with a good deed
I will burn in heaven

Swear to the sky
I am grounded
to the horizon of your smile

swear to the beat
i am shaken
by the sound of your silence

swear to the wind
swear to thunder
I am wandering
with your constant whims

take my word
you are the cloud
Dripping the soul of my sky

take my words
I wash my soul
at the river of your unspoken thoughts

swear to love
YOU are bliss
YOU are the constance of a hidden variable in life's equation
Discover the self


take my word
A trance state of mind conveying dreams of you
Is where I have called home all along.  

Take me with you
All I need is you
Caressing the wrinkles of my soul

Don’t take me home
nostalgia lingers in my soul
like the taste of that forbidden fruit
like the taste of water and air when drowning

don’t take me home
a survivalist without nostalgia
is a fish out of water

quietly listen to the quest of my heart
as each drift is justified
and each love story
is a battlefield
a ****** fight  

I fear
I, the survivalist, fear
becoming nostalgic for love.

God is here,
Beyond the daring frown of roses
beyond the scream of minor C
on the touch of your finger tips
as it sets my soul on fire when you touch my lips

overrated thought of afterlife
taken over the passing of a cloud
breaching the outer-sphere
finding the edge of the world
before the end is here

Savage the thought that God has always been here
world is me,
all that I could ever infer
This time,
the beautiful journey of evolution
crafting the precision behind "crying"
drives my tears

bowing to gravity
my tears drops are falling

For all that I fear
let's start over
for all that you dare
lets start over
this is our last chance
to hold hands, to dance
this is our last chance
to last this romance

Pondering and wondering what it's like

If it's an antique

why is it kept in the dark?

I doubt I remember how I got caught in this chaos

How my patterns stayed in concentration of actions

I caged myself through my own words and definitions

Holding down my own drifting sense of apex

In the dark,

where no body could imagine what we could be up to

we danced

forgetting to live?

Strings get thin and thinner, never torn

How gloomy will I fall at the end

If you let me

If I fall at the end

will you catch me?

my being-equation: a complex matter of variables

more or less meaningless

add me up

less me down

lose me

equal me to zero and define me again with your infinite thoughts

sigh ...

stings fade

requiem walks the night as if neither of us ever existed

and that defines us the way no one ever has

places Ive been, familiar places where Jesus had reborn

Moses cuts the sea in half

When ****** discovered the first time,
he likes the style of his mustache

we all wonder, but I wandered

I never harmed trees - or never intended to.
We both consume sugar
We both love the sunlight
We both dance with the music of the wind
and we both are grounded, rooted, and often in the way

I walk out of this door

as I walk under the rain, singing my simple song of breathe

I rush out to reach you to yell how I feel

Screaming out, inside out

Torn and happy, tired yet proud to tell you that I love you

right out load

- all I am living for.

Just like every school essay I've ever written
I am having hard time with the conclusion.
How do I end this chapter.
How do I conclude losing you?
I've been practicing this speech
In my empty room, in front of the mirror
But I don't hear applaud
All the sounds resemble the rhythm of you walking away
How do I conclude losing you
How do I tell every night dream
That you are no longer there
That you're gone for good
I've never been a good writer
Or a decent public speaker
And I certainly can not conclude.
This ship in the bottle
May be better off left misunderstood