Oh it's true that I've left myself slipping into this weird sensation, this hallucinatory feeling of security and self-reliance.
This feeling isn't all it's cracked up to be, in fact, it's completely devoid of what I thought it was supposed to be.
It's all upside down what I feel here.
Confused, I ramble the deepest desires I have to myself to keep focused on human goals.
I know that I'll never see space with my own eyes but I still have hope to experience isolation on my own.
It's such an incredible thing to perceive life the way I have, and the way you've yet to experience.
Somewhere we'll find each other in the way that it was meant to be, until then of course, we'll live life the way we best know how.
Life will be displayed in a thick red, exposing the flaws that flow to the surface revealing holes in the atmosphere that allow for indifference and carelessness.
"Manifest Destiny!" I shout from my pedestal, proclaiming that everyone has their own possibility and action, when I know that truthfully we are all just reactions, impulsively driven to the actions that shape who we are and what we are to become.

the internal struggle between my EGO and my SUPER EGO has left me bewildered at the current state of affairs.
When you write down your thoughts, do you too hear MOZART?
No, perhaps you hear BACH, or maybe BEETHOVEN.
No matter, I suppose, whatever it is that goes on in your head has nothing to do with me, as I am only a fleeting memory, even when I'm standing RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU.

The idea that I can create anything truly unique is what compels me to drive myself to the brink of madness.
I only need you to give me that last push, sending me spiraling into an insanity I've never known.
Frightening though it may seem, it's the only thing that makes sense anymore.
So with that, I bid you farewell as I plunge deep into my mind, hopefully to find myself.

This is like Schrodingers cat.
The trees bend and sway to impossible feats, but the moment I notice them, they stop.
What an amazing world we live in that is able to produce such absurd and seemingly unrealistic mechanics.
Oh what a day in the life of a quantum physicist must feel like.
Does he experience life the same as I, the "artist," based solely on creative expression and abstraction, or does he live in a purely mathematical realm where theorems and equations are the only facet of creation and intelligence?