I steal her hand, sit by her side
A whispered tone, a swift goodbye
I kiss her deep, and she is gone
I feel too weak to be so strong

I stand up straight, begin to shake
I clench my knees to keep my shape
I stand again, and am not sure
That I can fight, or will endure

I slowly turn the clockwork ****
The old wood groans the more I ****
My loved ones all sweep into view
They act, but they all know the news

A tiny figure takes my side
She grips my leg, begins to cry
I take her up, I kiss her head
I let her cry till tears are dead

I look down at my little girl
I see my wife, emotions swirl
My eyes go red, a heart torn deep


But I have promises to keep
And years to go before I weep
And years to go before I weep

Underneath the willow tree,
Sits below just you and me.
And all the many other things
That sit beneath the willow tree.

The willow tree between we,
And we around the willow tree.
A single bird begins to sing,
Underneath the willow tree.

I look at you, look at me,
Our eyes show that we’re happy.
The ground sprouts signs of the spring,
Underneath the willow tree.

My hand slithers cross the ground,
Hoping that hers can be found.
Wondering what this act will bring,
Underneath the willow tree.

Finally our fingers touch,
Hearts are beating so **** much.
Through the leaves the sun glinting,
Underneath the willow tree.

In a fury mind gives way.
I will take her, here, today.
Together our bodies cling,
Underneath the willow tree.

As we begin to reach bliss,
I lean to you and we kiss.
My whole body starts to sting,
Underneath the willow tree.

In the end we’re where we were,
Me just sitting next to her.
Our world hanging from a string.
Underneath the willow tree.

Her earthquake hands kept on without control,
as she was told the unrelenting news.
she could not speak, only eject her soul,
upon the hospice floor and pair of shoes.
Her knuckles raw, she pushed against her gut,
the fire tears scarred stripes across her cheek,
she cried for all the doors that would be shut,
and doors that she’d been given chance to peek.
Her tears now gone she sat up in her bed.
The fire passed, she held her belly tight.
And even though the boy inside was dead,
She would pretend for only one more night.
So holding womb, attempting not to cry,
she softly sang him his first lullaby.

I am blind, but I
feel an unwavering certainty that
I am not alone.
I know this as a truth,
yet I wonder if through this
leathery skin I will recognize
your entry.

Or if you will recognize mine.

Through every passing month
without you I have become *****.
I can’t help but wonder if you have too.
If we have become too
ruined to see each other for what we truly are;

a pair.

But I keep my dirt lodged in the
crevices of my sole
and continue to walk alone,
and with every passing brush
I imagine your gentle tongue discovering me,

and I am happy.

God gave me eyes to see you,
Nose to breath you,
Lips to kiss you,
Thought to miss you.

A mouth to whisper in your ear,
Two thumbs to wipe away your tears,
A heart to compliment my mind,
To think about you all the time.

Fingers to grasp your every word,
not leave a single one unheard.
Legs to stand up when you are down,
when there is no one else around.

And finally he gave me this,
to put meaning behind each kiss,
he placed in my body a soul,
So I could love you, till we're old.

Silence unwanted turns every breath to a choking attempt at salvaging my sanity.
Words fill my throat like *****, or death, but I swallow and send them to the pit of my stomach.
My eyes catch you now and wonder why I’ve let myself hold you, kiss you, love you, a fallacy
that has forced me to let my words die, rotting in the pit among the maggots and the heartache.

I bellow to the bottomless hell “Lord guide me!” but not even the echoes return my plea.
When the eyes close, mind starts to rebel, and memory conquers my soul and strings me with longing
for a time when I can speak my mind, and tell you of the things that rot with the maggots and fleas.
I can hear your voice, ever so kindly affirming my deepest desires, lusts, and feelings,

but abruptly my eyes are awake, and the cave’s darkness sheds light on your vows of betrayal,
and I swallow again, and the quake of my hand reveals what’s inside me.  The rock of your love
lays rest on your finger, and yet you have fooled me to digging this hole and living denial.
Yet as I lay here, and continue to swallow my words and feed to the rot inside, my love
is proven in these things unspoken, for I will never reveal to the world what you truly are.

Why do you wait for him my love,
riding waves of a dying sea?
Is it that you can see my love,
Something that others cannot see?

Your desperate eyes scan wave and air,
for his ascending wooden isle.
But don’t you see that you’re in err?
Your feet will never walk that aisle.

Yet still you stand your heart held bare,
listening to the ocean’s groan,
this has become too much to bear,
for you my love has only grown.

So when I watch your watching eye,
your soul enraptured by this scene,
Just know my love that it is I,
who leaps horizons to be seen.

I tell you now my friends, that I wont be seen again,
That I can forever end, this detestable trend.

I tell you now my love, that what we were dreaming of
Can still be done with time, though our dreams are now not mine.

I tell you now my son, that your start has just begun
Forgive me for my faults.
Forgive me for everything I have done to you

I tell you now my wife.



I tell you now my wife, this is not the life I had planned.
You brought a soul to this place, and it took you as replacement for our son
I tried to continue like you said, but everything in here is dead, along with you.
I hope you can accept this last act of defiance.
I love you.

I call your name into the echo.                  I wait for it to come back to me.


It returns, and as it enters me                    I’m shaken.


As you gradually fade                                each silence is a lifetime,


and I wonder at the                                    verbage of  a name.


I call out once again                                    into the echo.


It reminds me                                              of when these letters


first escaped                                                my lips.


But then, again                                             I’m empty


And even though                                         I’m calling


I realize                                                         my name


will not                                                          be missed.