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alex waddell Feb 2011
Ask me what
My deepest secret is

And i can't say

Pick Scratch Slice and Pull
Pain Hurt Feeling
Pain

make it stop make it stop make it stop

i don't want to go
To go anywhere tomorrow
i don't want to wake
Wake up

Bake up, burn me alive as i sleep

Abduct me
Take me away
Turn my insides in front of me so
i'll see what's underneath
The residue
Buildup
Filth

Waste mockery of Existence:
Unite and take over!
Art!
All spiraling cycles
Electrons move in circles
We're all spin offs of the
universe multiverse Omniverse
We're all gasses cooled down
Inhale, make them spin faster

May as well
alex waddell Feb 2011
Remember when          i said i spilled
Spilled me out for you to see?
Well now i've leaked all over the place
Drops of me pressing into lost attentions

Jack he looked at me
Jack he scratched my head
Said
He liked my hair

Not me
alex waddell Feb 2011
Mamma found him in his cage while I was away
At Jordan Ray’s
Talons up, feathers flat

.

Dearest neglect of Joey the bird
Lived in a pink cage,
Grew bright green feathers with a light blue spot on his shoulder.
Sister bought him at a mall cart,
Saved him, it seemed,
But now it’s clear that his fate was condemned
A live heart beat quick in hollow bones

.

From Jordan’s I rushed,
Hurried to confirm the news of my mother’s text:
“Joey died. You need to come home and clean your room”
Warm hearts beat cold in the blaze of August morning

Mamma, I found, she put him in the trash
Like a piece of pie with one bite taken
I found him lain upon heaps of pear peelings
Doomed in line to decompose
Among the **** and waste of the world

I picked him up

Placed him into a small shoe box

“Come on, Joey bird, lay in here”

It’s warm and dry and safe

Joey lay there, patient and dead
I took him in the yard
Out of the room he’d been in
Since sister brought him home

I found him a tree to chirp in, great oak

I placed his box on the grass and dug
Dug
Dug until I went beneath some roots

Kept digging
Unearthing pebbles and insect homes
Disheveling years of dirt and order

.

The heat of the day was boiling on my swelling soul
How could mother throw him in the trash?
Was he not alive; a thing? As much a miracle as you or me?
And my sister, his keeper, was not there to witness

Finally joey fit right
Fit just where he needed to be
The base of a great oak tree

Whose roots would **** him in
Like the lump in my heart did
With every scoop of soil
Like the love missed in life that joey died without

.

That was the first day I hated my mother
That was the first time I missed my sister
That was the only life I’ve ever mourned
alex waddell Dec 2010
there is a house that
i keep beginning to dream about and
i don't want to go inside

there is a neighborhood full of houses
too close to the street
they're all empty and open
they have lakes and oceans in their
backyards
and green carpets line hallways white with ice

and there's that one house
i won't drift near it
alex waddell Dec 2010
so
so sad
trees grow
where none will stop to stare
so slick
green stark
along roads wet with snow
so nice
rocking chairs
on windy wintry mornings
so sweet
your kiss
when eyes are closed not fawning
alex waddell Dec 2010
Tree trunks rising
show horizons
(Not where sky meets ground)
That cannot be found

places where silence
breeds sound
that cannot be peace
where shall we lead?

let me know
if somethings going down
i'll catch up
when i'm done

don't lead me home
lead me where my foxes live
they're so bright they'll know
the follow tree trunks
they've never sunk
o! hunters
run!
alex waddell Dec 2010
Where have you been,
Friend?
Can't we be
Friends?

Lets stand on moons
Of glacier ice
We'll bring blankets
And sinner's vice

So clear our moon
We'll truly see
Everything
Underneath

So clear in our heads
We can breathe
Each others thoughts
We'll be free

No matter
How clear (we see)
There will always be
Our moon, you and me
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