It has been a long time,
not too long,
just long.
Since I saw you last,
I have changed nearly everything about me.
Yes, I am still from the same place
And yes, I still love Apple computers.
And since Ive "become" this new person,
you wont give me a chance.
If I were telling anybody this story,
I'd say that I don't mind
That I don't care.
But to be honest,
I do care.
I'm so **** down
all the time.
Because of you.
You wont give me a chance.
I dont mind
I dont care
(yes I do)

look at you
sitting there
with those eyes that never cease to amaze
staring at nothing
thinking about everything

I know what youre thinking of
youre thinking of me
youre thinking of life
...and me
I know it.
you always do.

Im thinking about you
not everything
just you
and the Kansas air
waiting for the beautiful sunset to come
so I can see it in your eyes
see the twinkle of home

Im thinking of the future
With you
and me
and how its going to be alright.
Not just alright.
Absolutely perfect in every way.

Perfect.

Goodbye

All I ask
is for someone,
anyone
to give me a chance.
I want to show them
that there is more to life
than what meets the eye.
I want to show them
that even through hardships,
I can be their rock,
I can be their shoulder to cry on,
but most of all,
I want to be there for them.
For everything.
I want to show them
how things can be better
with me in their life.
I want to show them
that I am worth their time.
That I'm worth being with in the long run,
but things don't always work out that way.
We don't always get what we want,
so we just have to live.
Live with what we have
until we find more.
Until then I'll sit here,
looking and waiting
for someone,
anyone
to give me a chance.
To find me.

Do you see that?
that red thing?
following you around?
the thing throbbing and squirting out blood
yep you guessed it.
thats my heart.
my heart that is only for you.
The one that beats only for you
I know it's not attractive
but you are.
you have to notice it.
I mean its right there
looking at you.

Do you see what it's doing?
Its crying for you.
Leaving a trail of what was once my blood
what was once me.
Trailing you
always following.
It knows that if it gets too close,
you'll **** it.
I mean you've already killed me
cut me open and tortured me
past the point of no return

A new world
with new eyes
this is a lucky experience.
to be able to start new
in a world that has been around
forever.
yet everything
the moon
the trees
the stars
my world
my moon
my trees
my stars
have changed
its gotten rounder
grown taller
shined brighter

To forgive and forget
but not completely.
remember where you came from
remember people that changed you
learn from those mistakes.
learn from those successes
don't forget them
they shaped you as a person
and some of those aspects
will never change
but don't let them deter you
from reaching the dreams
you wish to pursue now

Change is a blessing
as much as it is a hinderance
The ways it changes you
hinders the way you once knew
the way you knew to run your world
your new world.
with your new eyes.

When I say to myself,
how am i going to make it through this
I look for the good things in my life.
My family, my friends, and you.
You were the thing that kept me together.
Now that you dont want me,
now that you know I'm not here,
I am not myself.

I look for you but you arent there
I look for anyone
but because you were there when they were there
no one is there
no one to help
no one to heal

Only you can heal the wounds you left me
only you can help my mind
That's all i think about anymore is only you
I still hurt,
I still cry
I still wait for you,
to say you want to sit down and talk

You know,
Its really sad to say this,
but only you can save me from me
Only you
saving only me,
thats all I ever saw

my world,

as only you and me

finding serenity in this place
if only for a second
is like catching a cold

if you dont pay attention,
it just might sneek up on you

you can try to find it,
but most of the time you wont
you will keep searching like the eagle in the sky

If you find serenity in this place
consider yourself lucky
YOU are one of the lucky ones.
either that
or you're trying too hard.

you see, serenity should come
out of thin air.
like the wind in your hair.
you shouldnt search for it
It should come.
Those who do search
become so immersed in a perfect world,
that they cant get out

so im changing my mind

I am a lucky one.
Im not going to find serenity,
im going to wait for it to happen.