What Once Was There

Im not looking forward to this day
My heart is aching with every step I take
My mind is racing with things I have to say
I went on for so long,
What went wrong?

(Chorus) I want to keep going on
I want to keep going strong
But now I know I have to let you go
So I can keep moving on
Missing you night and day
And yet I have nothing to say
You’re gone you’re gone,
But you’ve been gone all along

I count the tears that I cry
No matter how hard I try
To leave you behind
You are always on my mind
My soul empty, my eyes dry
I don’t know if ill be able,
To say goodbye

(Chorus)

I don’t know what life is going to be like ever since you left,
But I know all the memories will be kept,
Useless days of my life, spent
As I watch the sun set
I’ll watch the days go by
Where all you say is, “Hi.”
You’ve caused me so much pain
Playing your little game
You’ve turned my life upsides down
Then again you turned it around.

(Chorus)

You showed me what love really meant
For all the time you spent,
Showing my to love,
To get through life with no shove
Now my eyes are open
A veil lifted
Now I have my choices
My whole world shifted
My scars, all my weight
Now I can finally escape

(Chorus)

Even though we are on pause
My love for you will still go on
Before I had no one to count on
Now I have you to lean on


I want to keep going on
I want to keep going strong
But now I know I have to let you go
So I can keep moving on
Missing you night and day
And yet I have nothing to say
You’re gone you’re gone,
But you’ve been gone all along

I wake up in the morning,
No energy, no life,
Wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep.

I go through that day,
With fake smiles, Fake laughs,
Because I don’t have any real ones left.

What you said to me,
Was just another kick in the face,
It took me out, there was immense pain,
And just like everything else, I tried to shake it off.

I forced myself through the rest of the day,
With a bruise not on my face,
But in my heart.

Finally the sun set and darkness took over.
Sometimes sleep comes to you, not by being tired,
But by being tired of living the day.

The day takes a toll on you, physically and mentally.
But today, this day, everything came crashing down,
And took me down with it.

My support lines failed and now here I lie,
Not having the strength to once again, get back up,
Move on, and walk away.

They come and they go.
Here and there,
Never staying,
Always taking,
Never giving.

Getting so close,
But never enough
To look them in the eye.

It's better this way.
No feelings, no complications.

Expectations only lead to
disappointment, right?

I'm not easy but
Im only lying to myself.
I know who I am, where I'm going,
But not what I want.

It's not enough.
But what is?
Who is?
Am I?

Unanswered questions,
Unfinished business.

I now live my life by the "What if."
Always wondering,
Never doing.

You asked to be a stranger,
So that's how I'll treat you.

Gaining little and
Losing nothing.

They come and they go.
And then become someone I used to know.