I lived on an island
in the sea.
Along with me
were others
who lived peacefully.
We sang songs
to remember things
nobody cared about,
all so we could forget
our complacency
with our whereabouts.
Yet we found ourselves
surrounded by the sea.
Some brave souls ventured
into the deep,
and more and more people proclaimed,
"Follow me."
Yet I believed they
were drifting in too deep.
Mindless people
were all I could see.
As for me,
I tried desperately
to cling to land
as the sand
held my memory
and my hopes
were held
in the palm
of my hand.
Both man and woman
exited the island
for promise of
betterment.
"Better to be lost
In the desert of one's
mind,
than in the
waves of the water",
I reminded myself
plenty of times.
I did not want
to fall,
fall away.
Why enter the sea
of storms,
and heartbreak?
One by one,
my brothers and sisters left.
As I saw them leave
I realized
I was dead.
With every breath
I took,
with every time
I shook.
I looked
at the reflection
in the water
and realized
I merely existed
in this world.
Did I even matter?
I decided to venture out myself,
not for others
as a sheep to slaughter,
but as a soul divided
hungering for self worth.
I would not stay here
and let my fears
consume my years.
If I failed at least I could say
I was not led astray.
I took my ship
and set out to sea that day.
I sailed all through
the night.
I sailed with no
clear end in sight.
I began to doubt
there was purpose.
Suddenly I did not want to be there anymore.
I had gone too far I had been too slow.
As the storm began I started to regret leaving the shore.
I could have just stayed down
there and wondered
without end or change.
I could have just laid down
and never floated away.
Through the fear and the hopes
I realized it's all the same.
I'd be saying I'm sorry
all my life,
and in the end
I looked towards
sinking my sorrow
along with myself.
As I gave up my hopes I heard a voice inside my head.
"What if I told you there was a promise you had made?"
The waves crashed violently into my vessel.
"What if I told you this was not the end?"
A vague memory
passed through my head
as my sinking ship
lowered to its end.
I remembered my brother
the one who had led the way.
I remembered we knew each other
and our hopes were to meet again.
I remembered what he had said.
"Follow me instead."
I regretted my inhibition
and my doubts as I drowned.
"I'll take the grave in your place."
I woke up on an island
in the sea.
I asked the man next to me
where we had been,
and where we had gone.
He said,
"This is the place you've been searching for all along,
where all your blood is washed away,
and all you did will be undone."