"Do you think
that You are better
than Me?"
The answer, of course
was "No."
I told him twice
Once with the words from my lips
and then again with the voice
in my eyes
And I tell you
he believed me
As people always will
If you speak
in honest language
and let them look through
the windows in your head
that prove your words
to be true

When the puppet show
of your life is over
your useless name
is written on a piece of paper,
your mundane pieces
are sobbed over
and lamented
Then we put you in the ground
and leave you there
until
nobody and nothing remembers
your stupid name
except for the earth and the sky
But we are too small to hear them whisper,
the stories of our lives
too loud to even listen
and too human to even care

he is screaming but no one can hear him
she is singing but no one listens
he is lost but no one is looking for him
she is searching and finds that she is alone

words go unanswered
no matter what is said
they fall upon deaf ears
and reverberate into deep unknown places
an orchestra in the ocean
performed in a foreign frequency
a song lost in translation
heard by many
but meaningful to none

he is asking but no one answers
she is begging but no one gives
he is following but no one leads
she is leading but no one will follow

uniqueness is your downfall
strength lies in being the same
in possessing
the inherited dialect of survival
that cannot be achieved
it is a birth right
as natural as your name
but instead
of deserved solace
you received the gift
of 52 hertz of loneliness

he is calling but receives no answers
she is crying but finds no comfort
he is sinking but no one knows
she is dying and no one cares*

doomed to drift
through bottomless, indigo twilight
being carried on the waves
of your own erie lament
the sound of your sadness
is the cause of your isolation
your desperate song
remains your only hope
and it will never cease
someone, someday
will hear you
and answer
your heart wrenching pleas
someone, someday
singing love songs in the deep

This is not a good poem
it is merely a collection
of scattered thoughts
that match my disorganized mind

I came home
You were one of the few people
That I secretly hoped to see

Next thing I remember
I was holding your hand
needing you to hold mine too
hands on your chest
purple dress shirt
A summer full of pent up
attraction
(for me)
(for you? Probably not)
finally
put to action
Recklessly and carelessly

I valued the friendship
the innocent connection
of our similarities
tears of laughter
and mutual respect
and now this event
has caused me some
uncertainty

It was passionate
Maybe I don't regret it
Probably I regret not remembering
How it even happened in the first place

What did I do?
I closed my eyes
the world disappeared
and when I opened them
I was looking at you
my lips inches from yours
I discovered that
you are a good kisser

be flattered that I chose you
It doesn't happen often
know that I am still
quite fond of you
And sometimes my thoughts
Travel to that drunken night once a year
when everything is excusable
and I was happy just to be with you
and even happier that you chose me too

You're hurting me
Although I know
you don't mean to.
You do it from the ignorance
of your heart.
You ask
"How are you?"
with tones of insensitivity,
and I say good
like I wish I meant it.
Trying to express
with one false word
how badly I wish I could
punch your face.
But your asking
Throws me back in time.
"Take care"
Like you're saying goodbye.
Like I'm not good enough
for you to take the time
to look me in the eyes.
It was hard to learn to feel for you,
Knowing it was a mistake all along.
I'll turn the tables
of our relationship
in opposite directions
so you can realize
how easily I've come to the understanding
that abandoning myself for you
was wrong.
I remember now where I belong.

As if my own soul
Followed the diving birds
Into the ***** water
As if that water washed it clean
Worries carried from another day dripped away

Down through the crystal water
The birds dragged my aimless, wandering heart
Helping me to drown it in the present
Choking the polluted past from my thoughts
Suffocating me with the possibility
Of having to be apart
The pain of drowning in the pain
Strengthening the will to truly live
And enticing the mind to set the soul free

As if the cleansing allowed me to see
The glistening sunset fire
Flying across the water
Bright and untarnished
As it was meant to be
Flames and sparks obscuring all my
Misguided, misused memories

As if it let me hear the silence
Screaming in my ears
Silence that that could not be heard
Over the sound of imagined tears

The birds in the water helped me to reach
Past my own reflection
Past the distant shore
As if it was only water

I know there was something more

A crooked door
Off-kilter and ancient
Stands open
Not exactly inviting
Just expectant
Expecting us to be entranced
By the twisted world within
Mundane stairs are its only offering at first
But this tilted path leads to the sky
Eternal marble potholes
In silky molten stone
Woven with rocky veins
The sun is closer now
The world turns
Each step pulls us forward
Upwards and onwards
Lost in history
Living in memory
Of all the footsteps
That have passed
Who's feet have sounded here
And emerged from the murky twilight
Into the heavens?
The crooked door
Led to the crooked stairs
Which together formed the crooked tower