to you,

I'm writing a letter for you
keep these words close
lend these images solely
to those mismatched times

i speak with not much grace,
drink water in due respect -
look away yet return,
to your company.

equivocally
i wrote these words
on scattered note cards
learning from the floor
on what should be said
as each possibility
seemingly aligned

i threw away
these 3x5 letters
endearingly followed
by sincerely,

but clearly
i have thought
too much
worried little
than usual

perhaps,
a meal
at your leisure
with my words
now infront of you

but truly
in regards,
to that smile

Overcast evening mixed with air and rain
Foreboding hairs rising, thoughts in vein
Words a loss at most to the gloss of this face
Strikingly beautiful to the beholder to trace

And it comes to this,
To care once more
With armor and all,
Flocking feathers fallen a more

There heeds no guide
No aide
To why we do
What our mind forbade

Discipline furthers its stretch
This man and his juvenile mind a mesh
Simply a child seeking a maternal figure
In every woman, a trigger

Trickling on the sides of faces
Are theses outlines for lost graces
Mixed ways in dismays from everyday
Departure to fool into rapture today

This is how it revolves to the middle
Month where a year comes,
To so little
A refreshment course to the choices
Taken hold by desirable answers

Trying to figure not to procure
An imminent ache to secure

Glaring through the window,
Focusing on circling flies,
While having laid an impression with this body,
Have my hours promised this past,
and all before,
Blocking these eyes from thinking at all.

These closets with stacked belongings kept for certain,
The lights remain on even throughout the night,

they flicker at times !

these blinds almost shield this daylight,
allowing reflections to emit,

do my words have substance ?
does my soul care to admit

The patterns in the ceiling
Change their shades in the evenings
While my white linens line my body
I stare meticulously at dripping saline
My hands tell their stories
Of triumph and failure
Of changing primary colors
I can feel the beating
That resonates throughout

time dwindles,
like the whistling
annoyance of the morning
alarm clock
upon the now perturbed
ear drum.

a thumping sound
now sums up these tones and hands
us passing sands again.

hopefully gaining
through the contours
of this mind,

a broad to narrow
perspective of what reminds
me of these times.

I can't help but be concerned with your every move
with my mind developed in solitude
You move with out care with drunken eyes
Over mornings with an aching sighs

You speak with conviction
A smile with devious intention
But with a fire of daemonious concerns,
An Attention for fallen angels, you learn.

That the reality is not complete
Disconnected from you, and discontented
You elicit change in others providing
Romantic praise in libations of initiations

You gather lives, pressing a piece of yourself
In each intimate encounter – satisfied
That you have made light of their candle
A blue flame of resolving promises

You have kept yourself well
Free, intangible from the intrinsic
Drawing from your own ambiversive nature
Clearing your own torture of monotonous conjecture  

I almost lost your reflection
From the diversion of an incidence

Realizing your beauty surpassed superficiality
Through your eyes I see aesthetic sensuality

You sit there
devout in your intentions,
Deeply sure
that the path laid
is the path surely taken.

Frozen in my views
merely
kneeling
before alters of instituted obstacles,
feeling, pleading with myself
that what is set before me
is a fork with a middle way
taking my own trident
to absolve into paganistic
views of this world
where each objective
has a celestial voice

my comforts are
within knowing
and not what I try to understand

This is my mind thwarting fear
but repeatedly left in complacency.
Giving answers to my own questions
While my self interrogation
Never has been set in this time.

But always focused on the future
With a pessimistic view of the world

So that I can be secure
not be shocked, and surprised

To prevent myself to be mechanized
To form thoughts away from obscurity
So that I will not compulsively lie to sleep

I need to be difficult, and serious.

I need to be a person that gives them self
Hardships, days that put others to quickly raised flags
Because for some unexplainable reason, easiness, failure, and simply being stationary
Never has kept me defeated, but has provided me success.

I know myself but not well, but enough to realize my faults, and actions

My mind is always thinking, moving, caring, reasoning, and limiting itself
Because I am still simply a human trying to use sense in this world

We forget we are human;
We lay frozen in these carnal desires
We need to melt away
And be mindful of our winters