And in those days men shall seek death and shall not fight it. And they shall desire to die and death shall flee from them.

Let it not be death, but let it be completeness. Men shall let death melt into memory.

They shall desire to die standing naked in the wind and to burn in the sunlight, with or without fate.

Men shall wait till their hearts burst or erupt from overload of blood. Their bones should crackle and snap with every footstep.
Let them echo the word death. Let it foretell.

They shall rub their skin with hot, sizzling, popping grease. Shall drug themselves with gin and kosher salt.

With holes in their stomachs, men shall pant, “Death is divine.” Men shall love the bitter-sweet blood trickle down their eyes like tap water.
Let their knees burn on hot coal.

May their hearts fill with asphalt and their head fill up with toxic gases. Men shall sniff poison like they sniff flowers.
They shall skip on nails rather than in meadows.

Let them chew on tar and mate with eels. Bathe in acid and grow mold spots. Shall dance in the fire and choke on their teeth.
Crucify, liquefy, impale bleed them dry.

Scratch their backs with cacti and sleep with spiders in their mouths.
Shall hang themselves like ornaments on a tree.

Let them swing in the washing machines and stretch their faces till the skin falls like paper.

The men shall realize that death is their relative and not a sin. They will love it and cherish it.

Love just got in the way that night.
Wasn't supposed to happen like that.
I was hurt.
You were hurt.
I looked at the lit night,
Running my fingers across your skin,
Wondering why in the hell am I doing this.
Why did we do this...
How can something so sinfully wrong,
Feels so ******* good.
Twice that night.
I didn't care what my morals were for that hour and 32mins.
That night I left I pondered on my actions.
What we did was morally wrong,
But love just got in the way.
Let us vow to only us knowing what went down,
But not let it be spoken upon.

Why can't he fall in within the others?
Why does he stand out like a perched willow tree aching for deep attention?

As he places his hand on her soft white cheek,
He sees the tears of a lost one.

His left hand in hers,
She holds him tight as if he's going to fade away.

He can feel her heartbeat through his,
Their love is so close.

He can tell she doesn't want to let him go,
But with a sudden tug, he pulls away.

Tears on her face,
Her eyes are widened, she reaches her arm out.

He can hear the loud cries of his sad lover,
There's no turning back.

Ready for war.

Bronzer from neck down,
Diamonds on her neck, gold chains dragged by breeds.
Queen bee.
Mistaken, amiss, untrue champagne hair sprayed till shiny.
Glamorous eyes shine in the darkened nights.
To floral crop tops,
To flaunty knee-high shorts.
You wait hand on foot.
She demands.
Sunglasses perched up on her false nose, not even a dime pitched in for bills.
Her ****** struts catch eyes, but don’t bring any of them home.
Chewing on that gum,
Hundred dollar watch branded on her wrist.
Diva.
Bottles herself up, but not the children who need it most.
Lamborghini on point,
Lipstick in its place.
Rubs herself down with the most expensive lotion,
Checks her acrylic, high gloss nails.
Mascara filling, cheeks blushed, pearls on those ears.
Has the world in the palm of her white fair hands.
Crazy.
All of this, but can’t pay a house bill.

The anchor has rose up from its deep weighed level pressure. It isn't as heavy,
I can hold it with one hand.
I can use it for important uses.
The anchor may have rust stains, rugged edges, bent tips, and crisscross seaweed,
but i can use it.
This anchor has been through steeps of rubble and underwater debris,
But i can use it.
Nothing can pull my anchor back to the bottom drenches.
It'll stay up, thank you very much

I asked myself, how can love hurt this much? It's like we throw ourselves with our eyes closed. Except we don't actually throw ourselves, because we have no control. That's it, love orders us, and we don't handle it. We don't have a choice. Love may carry us to the heights that take our breath away. Love may push us to the depths of my heart not saved.

I love the way he talks, whisky parched with a little deep tone.
I love when I talk too much, 5am turn the radio up.
Blood, sweat, tears everyday, what do I have to do to get a donut?
My glass is full of wine, ring on my finger I feel imprisoned.
Love it when you're too cool for school, stop being a gangster.
Pop my *** up from a garbage can, wake up shirtless with red scratch marks.
Smell of citrus on my lips, standing too close to the TV screen.
Do I need a lil break tonight? I feel my body tensing up.
BBQ stains oh his left shirt collar, kissing in the rain till my hair frizzes.
*** in the city to the crack of dawn, Eggo waffles down my shirt.
Sipping tea on the back hot porch, singing blues every dreading Sunday.

**** with it.

As a sit in blankness, I forget who I am and what I do.
It's because of you.
You do this to me.
In a good way?
I don't know.
I feel good, at the moment.
But overall, I just want a warm hug.
I just want a kiss on the cheek.
I just want attention like the people give the sun.
You can't direct orders if I'm not on your team.
You can't control me, until you say you love me and want me as your own.
Brain is about to exlpode.
I love you too much.
Haven't been myself since puberty kicked in.
Odd.
I don't know where I am or if I'll ever find myself.

Why?
Why leave me left alone in the dark?
Why ignore me like my life has dispersed from your hands?
Why use me as your own?
Why conversant then devastate me?
You left the world for another
Your lips tasted like nicotine
And tobacco that night,
And I remember the
Way your skin was hot enough
To light a cigarette on
A winter day,
I should have seen the
Birth of my addiction
When your hot breath
Touched my neck, and
All I could think was
“Please, please,
Set me on fire.

Why does your hellos feel like hope, but your goodbyes feel like storms?

I battle with the idealistic of equality,
when in reality I need to be by your side.
Makes me hard to submit to the team.

She seen him across the wet sands.
The shore was just as wide as the sun can reach it.
Her heart ached, lips moved but air came out.
He was turned to where the sun can hug him.
She wanted to hug him.
“Why!?” she plead as she was closer.
He turned to her.
“Because I'm not made for you. We don't attach like the moon and the lit stars attach. Our lips don't spark when we kiss under the trees. I don't feel your company within me. I'm cold, I can’t right now.”
It was a cutthroat hesitation.
She felt her insides churned and burst.
“For once… For once I felt something brewing in me... like a bird loves a singsong. I feel as if this was meant to be. Us. We. The sun can only hold you for so long. But me, i can't hold you to infinitive.”
He held her tight, hugging her as her tears fell onto his sleeves.
Could this be the….end? She thought to herself.
“Please don't let go…” She whispered.
“I don't want to, but it needs to be done.”
With one tug, he was apart.
Feeling the cold gaps between them, wind separating their love.
No one liked this part.
Her brain, blasted from the repetitive scorn words that he said not too long ago.
She cannot get them out.
If only if only if only.
“I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being the burden in your air. Sorry for the space I've taken up. I'm sorry for invading the life that was once just yours. I'm sorry for being around!” She screamed.
No response.
The thick waves told a story as he walked deeper into them.
Why.

Is it bad to have a slight crush on your friend?
You guys are like family. This isn't right.
You tell yourself you don't like that person,
But the heart always interrupts.
You're sad when that person isn't there,
You're happy when you guys are hanging,
Songs play in your mind, mess with your emotions.
You create false scripted scenes in your head, hoping it'll happen.
These feelings need to go,
Before they tarnish a wonderful friendship.
That person doesn't feel that way,
Not that you know of.
It just wouldn't be right,
But it feels so right.
Is this why I'm sad?
Just keep putting them feelings down,
Don't let them out, before you tarnish up inside.
Goodbye for now, crush.

You don't deserve a poem.
Since you're such a *****.
You don't need the comfort.
When all you do is ignore it.

That willow tree,
that willow tree we found behind the park and between the houses.
A alley walk down where the dog would bark its head off and
where that family would barbeque with their soulful music.
That willow tree became our treehouse.
The noon sun peeked between the lengthy vines and kissed our faces.
It kept us cool when the sun was just too hot to handle.
From fruit picnics and polaroid pictures,
to a dead squirrel in the road and naked vines with tore off leaves,
It was a place we hugged.
A place we kissed,
grew,
learned,
laughed,
thought.
It was a place where people can walk by,
smile, and see how happy we were.
It was our willow tree.

Running in ***** shorts in the cold, dark night,
Blasting music till the neighbors growl.
Smash my face into a bowl of cereal,
Wake up sweaty with my hair stuck to my face.
Drop that bass while the weather is still warm.
Laugh and choke while sipping on water,
Can I get a raincheck?
Watch late shows throwing popcorn in the air,
Watch you fall into a bottle of perfumes.
Criss-cross apple sauce in a hardware store,
But don't get it twisted.
Take long naps till the sun don't shine,
Are we there yet?

**** this.

It was so obscure for you to come back into my life.
I wasn't expecting it.
You asked me to meet you at our local McDonald's.
Right then and there,
I should've said no.
I should've turned my back and not pursued a 2 month interaction with you.
But I chose to open my soul back to you and deter my wall of avoidance I had for you.
My wishes and dreams to be yours once again was a false imagination to the naked eye.
You even told me it would never happen but I chose to be stubborn and naive.
The things you do when you're in love.
I could say this was all your fault, but I played a part in it too.

You knew when I was happy.
You knew when I was angry.
You knew what I liked from the gas station.
You knew what annoyed me the most.
You knew my pet peeves.
You knew what words made me blush.
You knew my past.
You knew what I liked from McDonald's.
You knew what got me sad.
You knew what made me stubborn.
You knew my laugh.
You knew my smile.
You knew the quirks I did everyday.
You knew what was my favorite color.
You knew how tall I was.
You knew how I looked from the inside.
You knew what I loved about you.
You knew what I loved to eat.
You knew what to get me on my menstrual cycle.
You knew how to hug me.
You knew how to kiss me.
You knew how I liked to be touched.
You knew what made me cry.
You knew what movies I repeated.
You knew what cereal I enjoyed.
You knew how forgetful I was.
You knew how I clumsy I was.
You knew how to respect me.
You knew what clothes I styled in.
You knew my family.
You knew my anxiety.
You knew my body shape.
You knew what I was allergic to.
You knew you hurt me.

You knew too late.

I'm sorry if i annoyed you.
I'm sorry if i didn't know what stop meant.
It was my fault you were getting flustered at me.
It was my fault you flung my arm away and turned your back on me,
walking off into the distance.
i tried catching up,
but my heart pinched every time I witnessed your presence stray further and further away.
All I saw was a blurred figure.
My legs started to drag behind me as I tried to hold back my tears in embarrassment.
People were around vaguely noticing the situation.
Of course, my body couldn't take it any longer.
At a nearby school,
I sat on the grassy field feeling the warm tears racing down my cheeks as the sun slowly started to hide behind the trees.
There was no way to stop the agony.
You walked back home and the day hadn't even begun for us.

Hello birdie,
You flown on my shoulder and sung me a melody.
A melody that couldn’t be replicated
A melody that was meant for me.
I’ve been hooked to the tune ever since…
My sweet birdie
You’re so free.
I fear you’ll soar so far
You won’t come back home.

I see you’re a special one
Your melody is different.
It sends fireworks through my veins—
Rushing to my vitals—
Pumping and generating pure love.

How selfish of I to have something so beautiful.
I wait on you by the window,
But you’ve slowly stopped coming.
I don’t look for any other symphony but yours.
But I guess I’ve stopped listening to your song…

I’ve shut my window and closed my ears.
Tuned myself into other noise.
You’ve flown so far from me I can no longer hear you.
That is my fault…
Have I taken advantage of your specialness?
I fear you’ll sing that same melody elsewhere.

God, my sweet songbird
What have I done?…
So gentle
So serene.
I fear you’ve already sung that special tune to someone else.
Open my window and stick my head out,
I put my ear against the wind
And waited.
Waiting…
Is it too late?

You’ve grown tired of singing to me
But I won’t stop.
I’ll stand by my window and wait.
Wait till I hear your nectarous symphony again.
I won’t stop
Till I feel you on my shoulder once again,
Home at last…

You thought we were friends.
You thought we were cool.
You thought you had the world in the palms of your hands.
You thought things were given to you so you can break them.
You thought love grows on trees.
You thought you were a man.
You thought everything was okay.
You thought a smile and a wave can help.
You thought life would move on your way.
You thought you could run away from your fears hoping to ignore them with a false smile on your face everyday.
But guess what,
You thought wrong.

Tonight, this lonely night. I stay up in the mist of darks.
Thinking about you.
You were the light that led the ways to wonders.
As I sit in the dark, I reminisce the speck of life we had.
So short, yet felt so long.
My heart aches for your warmth to surround me. Your arms twined with mine.
I miss your soft delicate lips that felt as if kissing a daisy.
Who cared? You cared?
You stretched your heart out to the ones who needed it.
Your soul was, and is, a ball of entertainment that can entertain a universe all at once.
I miss those hands that were cold to the touch,
But yet wonderful to grip.
You were the one I can mess with your chin,
You were the one I can run my fingers through your thick curly plush hair.
You were the one I can show my odd abilities to, and you wouldn't dare look at me strange.
Can I take a moment to inhale your sweet succulent aroma,
Reminds me of love.
I lay my head on your shoulder,
My eyes glance at what can be the future for me.
Yet, Has left me here to question is there anything out there for me...
You were, and will always be, the one that crosses my mind in a snap dream.
I sit here in the mist of darks,
Thinking about you while my stomach churns and heart aches.
Will you come back, will you?.

I'm kinda tired of having these reoccurring dreams about you and waking up and you're still not here.
what ever happened to predictability?
I'm torn between the two. Between what's wrong and what's right.
I was happier then.
Or was that me? Or am I now me?
Like holding water in your hand.
Would you go back to then? Just beginning then?
Would you?