September 30th, 2016,
Saturday.
It was my birthday.
I was officially becoming grown in a sense.
And what other way to spend it than with you.
You took me out that day.
For tacos and a sweet dessert after.
My menstrual had fallen on that day so you tried to make it better.
It was that day, we were gifted with our son,
Theodore the Big Teddy.
Theo for short.
You know, I still have that big bear.
It takes me back to the day you bought it for me,
knowing I wished upon a star so many times for one.
Among-st all my birthdays,
that one sticks up like a flower in a grassy field.
It was my first of ever,
spending it with the love of my life.  
I thank you for making my 19th birthday a day to remember.

I was alone that night.
Because of you,
I had to walk in bravery and fear alone.
Your anger liked to stick to you like a burr plant on blue jeans.
Whatever it is I said,
it boiled you.
I walked home that night alone in darkness and in confusion as to why you weren't there protecting me at that time of need.
I couldn't let anyone know what you did to me,
it would've left a bad taste in their mouth.
No call,
no checkup,
no worry,
nothing.
You didn't seem to care about my safety until I had already made it home.
Tired,
exhausted,
sad.
You only asked because you felt bad for not caring.
At that moment,
I should've left for good.
But I stayed.

It was Halloween.
Crisp, cool, autumn afternoon.
We spent that day giving out candy to the little ones trick or treating.
There was nothing out of the ordinary besides the spooks and ghouls all around the neighborhood.
But that day took a horrible turn in a split second.
A fight had busted out down the block,
it had something to do with my loved ones.
In fear, we ran.
With no shoes on my feet,
I ran.
Knowing I have mild asthma,
I ran.
You and I were able to diffuse the fight just in time.
Everyone,
out of breath and flustered,
made it back to the porch in whole.
For some reason,
you were mad at me.
Everything I did and said boiled your blood to the point of no return.
Even when everyone was off the porch,
you were still upset.
Was it something you misunderstood?
Was it my complaints and fears?
I don't know.
Halloween spirit was ruined and the only sound in the air was the cold wind.
With your consent,
I walked into my home with no return.
"*******" is what you said to me.
**** me for leaving you out on your own,
**** me for not saying goodbye,
**** me for ruining your afternoon.
**** me, right?

Each other's houses wasn't a thing yet,
and neither one of us had a car.
Our neighbor hood was small so where else would you go?
The park.
It was the beginning of everything.
That is where we first went,
together,
to know one another.
It's where we got continuous bruises from play fights.
Where we got into heated arguments and wasted all day ignoring each other,
cuddled all day we couldn't stay away from each other.
It's where we had fruit picnics and water fights,
deep conversations about our lives and futures.
It's where we first experienced a real kiss,
witnessed our favorite, "dread head elderly couple."
It's where the wind blew and froze us in the fall,
where the sun blazed and cooked us in the summer.
We found toys and did angsty teen challenges,
got bit up by mosquitos.
We had our favorite spots,
almost as if this was our house.
I experienced small womanhood there,
We found baby birds and titled ourselves a family.
We stayed till dusk,
night.
We swore we saw a giraffe in a lady's window every time we stopped by.
I watched you grow as you watched me grow.
That park was where you finally asked me to be yours.
History began itself.

That willow tree,
that willow tree we found behind the park and between the houses.
A alley walk down where the dog would bark its head off and
where that family would barbeque with their soulful music.
That willow tree became our treehouse.
The noon sun peeked between the lengthy vines and kissed our faces.
It kept us cool when the sun was just too hot to handle.
From fruit picnics and polaroid pictures,
to a dead squirrel in the road and naked vines with tore off leaves,
It was a place we hugged.
A place we kissed,
grew,
learned,
laughed,
thought.
It was a place where people can walk by,
smile, and see how happy we were.
It was our willow tree.

In the car,
on my way back home,
a song sung to me as it traveled through my headphones to my ears.
"I've been thinkin' bout you
for quite a while,
You're on my mind everyday and every night."
It tickled my heart and warmed my soul as it continued playing.
It made me think of you.
Every lyric,
every melody,
every tempo,
It sent me straight back to you.
I had to tell you how it made me feel,
I couldn't contain it any longer.
But it's like you read my mind.
You knew exactly what song I was talking about.
You've searched for it for years, but never got the chance to find it again.
And from there on,
it became our signature song.

I'm sorry if i annoyed you.
I'm sorry if i didn't know what stop meant.
It was my fault you were getting flustered at me.
It was my fault you flung my arm away and turned your back on me,
walking off into the distance.
i tried catching up,
but my heart pinched every time I witnessed your presence stray further and further away.
All I saw was a blurred figure.
My legs started to drag behind me as I tried to hold back my tears in embarrassment.
People were around vaguely noticing the situation.
Of course, my body couldn't take it any longer.
At a nearby school,
I sat on the grassy field feeling the warm tears racing down my cheeks as the sun slowly started to hide behind the trees.
There was no way to stop the agony.
You walked back home and the day hadn't even begun for us.