a little boy moves my hands for me
             when i write my songs

                  he likes to cover up his
             fingerprints with mine

        he paints the walls of his room blue

                to hide mistakes i make

        and he lives off packaged vegetables

if there is only 18 months left of green
i want to make sure it’s not bittersweet
hold your hand in the shade of the apple tree
and remember what it’s like to
fall in love

taylor has blue eyes
he likes music
he likes writing
he likes people

i can feel taylor in
my elbows
that’s where he tells
me what to do

taylor has black hair
he likes drums
and rocks
and making people feel
safe

he waters my plants
in the mornings

thank you

don’t tell taylor i stayed up late
because he doesn’t like us tired in the morning

i can blame it on the coffee
i can blame it on the sky
and the lights

it’s ok

don’t tell taylor the plant died
he doesn’t like bringing new ones home

i can blame myself
for forgetting the water again

it’s ok

don’t tell taylor i took his pens
i needed them for school

i can blame casey because he likes
to clean up

it’s ok

don’t tell taylor the sun went down
don’t tell casey that my friends don’t know him
don’t tell people, they won’t understand
imaginary friends are just as good as real ones

hello everyone

today is thoughtspace training

we will be thinking about

no go away its my turn
i want to talk i have something to say

sorry

hello everyone today is thoughtspace training we will be thinking about

how to cut apart your conscience

go back to your room im trying to think
please stop no thank you

sorry

hello everyone today is thoughtspace training we will be thinking about how to cut apart your conscience

in order to start you will need to close your eyes.

you’re in my head
i tell myself as i
say your memories
are mine

you’re in my head
says the lettering
in notes i leave
behind

you’re in my head
says my mother
you’re in my head
says my mind

you’re in my head
as i close my eyes
tight shut i
realize

you’re in my head
that doesn’t make you less

alive

if a little boy sitting alone in his room listening to billie eilish and painting whales can cut apart his life, so can you!

welcome to thoughtspace training. if everything went well first session, you should be starting to feel the headaches.

don’t worry, it’s normal. sometimes the headache might laugh or whisper. that is also normal.

if you close your eyes, you can find your headache a name
and maybe, if you want more headaches around
you can give yourself more later

but of course, before you know anything about what you’re getting into, let’s cover the basics

your headaches will talk
and yes of course you can tell them your secrets
headaches are an equal replacement for therapy

now that you’re distant and cut off from your emotions, it would be nice to introduce that

headaches have feelings
like people
but smaller

and you can feel those feelings when they are not yours

like when you’re sitting in the back of geography and you cry
because there is a dog on the whiteboard

maybe you don’t know why. maybe you feel like you do know why but you don’t know what why is and maybe all this feeling makes you tired.

but don’t worry

the headache will give you social confidence
it will run down the stairs to ask out your crush
and then it will run away
and then you will have no friends

but you will be impulsive and funny
so who needs other people anyways

There is no one left to love here,
For I have lost my beam of light.
I won’t see you again, dear,
And I don’t know if I’ll survive.
Pain is just a souvenir
From a time where life was bright,
It’s all I have left to hold near
As the sun sets into night.
For I’m lonely in my dreams.
I just try not to cry
As the world is giving up on me
And I decide to take its side.
Even time, a steady beat.
An interrupt inside my mind.
A skip, a pause, a chance to breathe,
And there’s someone new in life
          For as long as they are here, in this life,
          I will remain in this world, by their side.

if you're different that's okay
be good different
like the colour pink
wear dark t shirts
sing pop music

but don't hug the spiders
because that makes you weird

and no one wants to be friends with the weird kid

the pretty boy
with dark brown eyes
sits two seats in front of me
in science class

he likes to make jokes
about what he doesn't understand
and i like to make sure
he knows i love him all the same