I can still fell
The last "I love you"
Stuck between my teeth
As I sailed away
Off into the unknown
And the only thing anchoring me down
Is the fact that the butterflies in my stomach
Are succumbing to gravity
And holding me in place
Among the waves of the tears you cried
Standing on the dock
With my picture clutched in your hand
And my love in your heart

When do you lose
Your Childhood?
Your Innocence?

Was it when I was 5
And I said
"I'm a big boy now"?
Or is it when I'm 18
And the government tells me who I am?

Actually, it's neither
I was stripped, robbed of my innocence

When I was 15
He told my mother
"The last 18 years were the worst of my life"
And I didn't react

I was robbed of my childhood
When I was 16
and He told me he didn't like
"What you are"
And He said
"You can pack your ****, and you know where the door is"
And I just stood there
Silent

I no longer have my innocence
I no longer have my childhood
But I am not yet a man
I am the gray area in between
And that's all I will ever be

Some days I feel 10 feet tall
Other days I feel six feet under

When we kissed
Instead of feeling us come together
I felt a part of me
Disappear
And I'm not sure which part it was
But I want it back

I'm used to being
The quiet one
Who never says a word
But what I did tonight
Makes me regret
Everything I did
Because I now realize
That I am numb
Numb
Null
And void
Just like my chest cavity
Because I knew from day one
That a heart only beats when you're alive

Star-crossed lovers
Is more like the stars
With their fingers crossed
Hoping one day for me to meet them
Once upon a midnight dreary
So I can finally profess my love
And tell them
They are the reason
I spent my entire youth
Looking through a telescope

Eventually,
Everything will disappear
So will you take my hand
Because even in the dark
I know you can be my light

I am the king of this dusty road.
And no matter which way I go
I always end up back in this place
That they all call home
For me this place has never been a home
How does one even find a home?
Every place I stay
I find more reasons to walk away
My feet have grown tired from this endeavor
And I have nothing left to do
But rest on this dusty road
Where I know I am King