the wretched fin of despair
finally broke through the floorboards
circled around the sofa
and the table upon which
we supped
muffled laughter wafting
up from somewhere below
a thud
here and there
in between rips and tugs
and labored gasps
razor sharp leading edge
chewing slicing sawing
through the kitchen and down
the slate black steps
to the front door
and out

People are like eggs
some get eaten

some break open, revealing
a beautiful, rich, and delicate
center

some lie in the nest
far too long
eventually taking up a dim
green
hue
and rotting slowly
from the inside

and some, against all odds
are held just right, warm
for the correct length of time
and hatch
into vibrating ***** of fuzz
that venture forth
into the cold
waiting
world

a heart has many hands
i whispered  
while moonlight stole
through the tears in our blinds
but her breathing never
changed, never
hinted
she had heard and so
i rolled away, sensing
the dog shift
in its soft bed upon the floor
and tried
to pretend
i hadn't really said it

a mannequin with wings
flew past my window
gliding softly
like a great
     soaring
          bird
and i stopped, listening
hoping
it would make another pass
so i could be sure i was not
after all
alone

My last dog
was a red sand dog
of autumn shades
and biting flashing glory
gleaming fur and stretching legs
across flowered meadows
where deer slept at night
under stars winking
like the tiny glints of silver in his
eyes
deep open dog eyes
of honest self and wonder
waiting for the next walk or
run
through grass heavy and wet
nose twitching, wanting just to lay it all
out

but he, like the others before him, was
put coldly to death
by my neighbor

dim light of winter
cats thirsty
and now the dog has gone
up and down
the stairs at least thirty times today
while out beyond the fogged
glass
of the south wall
a wind-blown
     snow
          man
props himself up with half
a martini glass
and inside
here, with us,
rests a magnificent
sable antelope
its dense pelt fuming
and steaming
us toward spring

Got big plans alright
gonna ***** myself up out there
just a long greasy smear
across the sidewalk of your heart
where'd that ****** come from
they'll ask
as I blur past
right outta nowhere
and you'll do your thing, smile,
walk along as if nothing at all
had just happened
and I'll wait for you
on the other side
while the others wonder

Crows overhead
in a late October sky
evening
near dark
a few late warblers
in and among the trees

at least
the crows were silent
as they winged past
and therefore wise

the dog, fed,
stretched out upon the sofa
thin chili on the stove
steaming faintly
the two of us here
a hand-drawn map
upon the table
a reedy voice crossing the plains
you        and        me
and nowhere else
to
go

Now this galley's bound
for foreign ground
the sea's aswell with gold
so we'll ply our trade in ****** raid
and may the lanyards hold

And it's row men row
or the crack o' the whip will show

Now the pirate's life is full of strife
her belly's never full
so she's always quick
with knife or stick
to split a rich man's skull

And it's row men row
or the crack o' the whip will show

So the Roger flies for spying eyes
to let their weak hearts know
that Blackheart sails
among the whales
and her gold lies safe below

And it's row men row
or the crack o' the whip will show

She possessed the keenest eye
I have ever known
and the pure
ability
to see what others would call
beauty
before even they could see it
and possessing that raw talent
made her the finest
photographer
I have ever
known
I mean, her photos hung everywhere about
that great hot city
we lived in
and her name was well known
in galleries of all
sorts
it was all I could do
to keep up with her
but I tried, and
once
somewhere in the flat
open
plainness
of eastern Montana, somewhere
between, I think,
Wolf Point and
Glasgow
she told me to stop
the car
so I did, and she got out
walking off into all that tall
bison-grazed and
yellow
grass
to shoot silent photos of an old building
and while her back was turned
I took her picture
but never told her

frost rime, moss, and shatter'd
limb
tall spruce a wanton guard

our thoughts like steam from
broken mouth
trail back to summer's yard

while wait and lie and wait
again
the ridgeline constant scann'd

and bow and blade and axe near
by
and fires held low, not fann'd

with voices soft and breath kept
close
and furs and leather clutch'd

we swore and begg'd to gods we
knew
and others we knew not

'til dawn a misty lifeless haze
broke forth her frozen glow

and through the mouth of Hell
itself
the first of them did blow

like leaves before a horrid
storm
the Roman legions came

yet worse, alas, before the crest
a beast we could not name

bore down upon us cruel and
fierce
and widely gaped its maw

the cane corso Romans bred
to rend us tooth from jaw

my axe a useless feeble limb
no strength to give it seed

no time or space to swing or
slash

but time afresh to bleed

Lying discarded and torn
upon an autumn path
a pair of paper wings I found
one a little damp
along the trailing edge
the other sun bleached and rippled
from some long ago summer day

So of course I strapped them on
looked around
and, well, flapped
hesitantly at first, but after feeling
that alarming little
     tug
of lift
I really went at it
beating the air about me
breathing hard
and then I was airborne
floating
lurching
tilting and leaning
climbing skyward

The little birds
and insects of the green and flying
sort
fell silent about me, watching
while upward I pulled
smiling

coming to see you
i'll wear rat skins
stapled carefully
to my buttocks
nothing else
just fine pelts of waxy blue
rustling
as i walk

Down a narrow pass we swept
  her eyes before me born
of love and loss and hallow'd oath
to cruelest vict'ry sworn

My blade a broken, sallow friend
  her locks my breath caress
o night o day o snow-shorn fields
and onward swings the press

Of hooves on stone and bloodied grass
  her hands beneath my cloth
a voice in foreign tongue on ice
through shatter'd lips does froth

We called to mind warm flower'd fields
  her legs round mine did wind
to soothe our longing hearts of loss
yet never ours to find

And ever stretch'd the Roman leagues
  her touch upon my back
while leathern jerkins, helms of bronze
the northern axe does hack

The city's warm the old men say
  her laughter fills my heart
while oxen pull and steam and sweat
and bodies fill the cart

A sputt'ring blaze, a mountain *****
  my breath against her *******
and blacken'd arrows streak through night
to claim our yeomen's chests

A narrow range no place to fall
but onward pound the drums
o'er stone and snow and bloodied earth
and ever forth death comes

     her eyes, her locks
     her hands, her gaze
     her touch
     her laughter, gone
     and mine the breath
     through broken mouth
     that life once dwelt upon

When toward your eyes
my crooked heart
reaches
there comes a flow
of good and bad but
mostly good
and this in turn sets
a glorious blaze
upon the distant hills
all consuming, sending
forest beasts out
upon the plains where
further scatt'ring then
occurs
until all resettles itself again
the birds alight
and preen one another, the
squirrels come to rest
tiny underleaf mammals begin
to quiet themselves
and you breathe and i
breathe
and the warm surety
of us
comes over and
upon
it all

and out of the alpine mists
a lone figure appeared

well, not lone, entirely, for
upon its graying and wind-blown head
rested a yellowish straw-sewn bird (?)
of some kind
didn't really get, you know, a very good look at it
running, as i was, for my life
but i did hear
in heated passing
as through that shadowy figure
i seemed to slip:

there's a mountain up ahead
made of smoky black glass
stone magic
you can-

speak up, **** you, i rejoined
i can't hear very well through
these woolen and aged
ears

if you try, it returned, barely louder,
you can really
SEE
through the ****** thing
don't ask me how
it just works
have a look, you'll see
for YOURSELF
miles away you can make out
things adistant
from where you stand

and so, arriving
finally
at the foot of it i
tried, fool that i am
leaning in close and squinting
****** idiot though i felt myself
to be
for the rock was rock and
SOLID
dark mineral regular ordinary
ROCK
nice try, i thought, beginning
to turn away

but then
just then
it worked, by god, through
the smoky black stone
i could
SEE
sure enough
miles afar and years away
there
among trees and hills and
bee-laden flower heads
there
i saw

you

I'll be here

waiting

even when it's late
and the night is windy
the sky low, wet, dark
the others having
left
so just go ahead
my love
and take
your time
I will be
here

cringing shadow figures roll darkling ***** of rubber
in circles around me while i sit

perfectly

still

at my table, waiting
and hoping they won't notice me
especially the big one
in the purple vest
i saw his teeth in a yellow flash
when he snapped out at one of the others
a few minutes ago; they
fell in line again, resumed
the roll roll roll of *****
'round and 'round my table but
faster now

i don't know
how they got in
but i'll make a note to ask
when someone comes along

With paper bag hands
I try
desperately and with great
concentration
to calm
soothe
stroke and entrance
the fluttering bird
of your love

this cloak of tattered
wishes stitched and gathered
by weary fingers you
placed upon my shoulders
allowed me passage
through dreary nights
storm-ravaged
days
safe, though not entirely
unattacked
i climbed crawled dragged limped
just as you said
i could though i didn't
believe
over stony sharp crags
barren slopes
through treeless forests
where all the owls stood
earthbound
past clinging vines wet
and heavy with unfulfilled
dreams
into icy winds that rent flesh
from my sodden bones
into and upon waters so
deep and dark and roiled
not a human eye could see what
hells their depths succored
until at last
with the weight of never-ending night
the cloak
and i
reached forth and fell
limp
into your embrace

I am not well, she said
and like a rabbit on a lonely road
my heart froze

I see the eyes
dark on the horizon
that think they are unseen
smell the foul odors
of hopelessness and despair
that believe they are
unsmelled
hear the voices
hard and tight
against the wire fence
that trust they are silent
and unheard
feel the trembling fingers
in the night of my past
that assure themselves
they are unfelt
alone in this
yet hoping I am not
the only one,
she said

and into the surface
of that darkened road
the rabbit vanished

Reaching through night
I found you there
and your thoughts
your eyes
your dreams
opened before me
a harbor against
the waves
and the hordes
pressing in
while about us
on all sides fell
the flaming towers
and the very stars themselves

Coal lantern heart
a dim red glow
through my crooked ribs
swept this way and that, a feeble ember
among the black wet trunks
night forest and leaning trees
of your love
my feet, torn and stung
by many a stray thorn
and twisted fallen branch,
plod and weave and stumble
searching
as a light fog arises
from mossy floor and worm strewn soil
the moon above
a mocking ancient savant
thinly veiled by passing clouds
your name I call, voice
more like a last breath
while from somewhere behind me
the faint sound of dry and rustling wings
arises

Dim light on tall trees
and slow movement of air
like breath softly exhaled
you next to me
in buttoned shirt and warm pants
afluff, still, and steaming warmly
like horses in winter
the slow tick tick tick
of life's clock on death's mantle
and it's always later
later
later
than you think

I see him
in fading breath of August
plaid pants black
socks
peddling his wooden
bicycle
along and over the cobbles

I swear it's hewn
from a single block
as is
he himself
with the stripes flying
across his tattooed
back
a hot rope
of light
pulling him along and
across
this page

the stone one
he says, passing,
was too
heavy

Baby, I think

I'm

falling

I know, love you too
let's stay
together
no matter what
and cabins and rivers then
streets
of Copenhagen and back
to cabins and winters and
books and papers
then back for a defense and then
back again and oh my god
I think
I'm pregnant
I have a surprise, don't
make any plans
what is it
will you marry
me
of course, Baby, of course
I got a job
let's go, let's move
and the baby's crowning, now
push
and a little apartment atop
a house atop
a hill atop
a life fresh begun
my god, Baby I can't
believe it
hi Dad you're going to be
a granddad again
well you better get
off the **** phone
and get to the hospital
look at her little crooked
nose
I didn't sleep
did you
and here we are
there we were
what's for dinner
let's put on your shoes
pick up your socks
time for daycare
we're moving back
to the States
Baby, oh my god, I'm
pregnant
guess what, Mom
I can't believe we
have our own
house
mint elf
time for your bath
can we get a kitten?
happy birthday
Mommy my shoes don't fit
where's my backpack
a cold winter night
a hot summer day
turn off the tv
let's go for a bike ride
good night, Daddy
time to get up, Sweetheart
What did the vet say?
Zoe has cancer
when you have time
will you make me breakfast
I'm scared
my new teacher is really
loud
I'm tired
don't feel good
practice violin
Merry Christmas
my belly hurts
mow the lawn
let's rake the leaves
can we jump in them
I got an A
shovel the sidewalk
trips to the beach
can we go sledding
I'm going to sign up
for track soccer football
can I get a phone
you have riding today
there's nothing
to eat in this house
I want to take dance
everyone needs
to take a turn
I want to be a cheerleader
for Halloween
there's no
clean
laundry
I need new boots
can we go to New York
congratulations
I can't believe it's
over
already
Baby, I think I'm

falling

I know, me too
I'm here
just
for
and just
with
you

Pushing my soul dreams
through the Japanese curtain
of her will
her resistance her system
of beliefs
her best friend's diary
she shudders and papery
leaves fall where the apples
lay on yesterday's
cool autumn grass

And a flock of blackbirds arose
from somewhere in my heart
winging away before I could count
their number
while on or just beyond
one of our many horizons
an eye blinked
slowly
watching our days unfold
and somewhere far from here insects
floated in the waning light
of an early summer eve
just above
a dew-gathering plain

I'm in the fireplace
again
and no one can see me
because I'm
STILL
and quiet
and gray brown flat
and ancient
just like the bent iron grate
that holds me up

days
go by, cool nights
and I sit and
WATCH
from in here
as they walk by
talking
laughing
drinking their coffee
and wine
entirely unaware and happy
while I sit
alone
squinting, breathing
everything very
SLOW
and just fine by me