I am trapped I have no escape.
My prisson's walls are very high, smooth and slippery so that I can't climb out of there.
There is no door and window here.
No one hears my cry.
My prayers are like sounds that bounce on the wall.
I'm just talking to myself.
God Himself seems to have turned his back on me.  
It feels like I've offended Him so baldly, that He only means to destroy my life now.
It's over.

I don't know.... this is my frustration and bitterness at this momment.
I'd like to drop dead and not open my eyes into this world anymore.
Some people might cry for a little while, but they'll get over it.
The other thing that makes me feel hopeless, is that no matter how much I want death to come on me, I passed the time in my life in which suicide was really an option.
I have to keep living in this jail which is called life on earth.
I feel condemned.
When will I ever be able to close my eyes permanently and never wake up?

What happens in my mind.....
A world within the world we live in,
but at the same time distant.
All the things in my mind make sense to me,
althought to many other people they don't.

My perceptions, my ideas, my dreams,
my abilities, they're all mine and no one else's (except God's)

One moment I'm talking and having a great time with people,
but just one second later I disconect.
It's awesome being like that!!

In my mind, I've flown around the world a billion times,
I've visited amazing places and done things that are not posible
on planet earth.
Just because they can't be done on earth, it doesn't mean they can't be done at all......
I've done them in my imagination, they are just as real to me as the chair I'm sitting on.

After reading this, you might think that I must've got ****** or drunk, but this is only me....
God made me this way.