What I say:
I love your new haircut
Did you get your eyebrows done?
Are those new shoes?
It's been so long wow!
You look so good in that shirt!
What are you doing this weekend?
What'd you get on that Algebra test?

What I want to say:
Are you insecure?
What do you think about the sky and all it's colors?
What do you think about late at night before you drift in to perfect sleep?
What makes your heart sing and tingle?

Small talk is for the simple minded
The depth of a conversation can change the world
Expand your horizons
Don't stop at the water, keep swimming
Dive into your heart
Feel my presence
Work to understand the humans
And don't just stop,
Keep looking

Standing there
Staring down at myself
I wonder
Would one consider
Me a
Victim
or a
Valiant?

I am flesh
I am bones
I am mania
I am melancholy
I am madness

My clouded reflection eyes me
Like it is analyzing
My every twitch
Trying to decide if
I am a victim of this
Or maybe if it is a victim
That I have saved
It can see that I am dependent
(I depend on the pills
To make a difference)

I stare into blank eyes
A sober face
I touch my rippling reflection
Like I could actually feel it
For what it is
In its true essence
All it does is
Disappear

I look at myself
And wonder
Who took it
And took it from me
In silence
Until I had given it
All away
And silence
Was all I had left?

The surface calms
I can see my face again
My eyes look glossy
Like I am
Somewhere else
(I am)
In the dark mirror
A woman is trying to
Make waves with her legs
No, she is just
Passing by
Am I a victim
To this travesty
I am unintentionally
A part of?
Or am I a hero
Because I have managed
To conquer it
Before it could
Fill me up
And sink me down
Until I
*Disappeared forever?

The fire is lit
The rain irrelevant.
People surrounding trying to bring upon the burs,
But the fire unalterable.
Toasting the air with every deep inhale.
You assure me with your warmth
We see the spark of every enduring flame
The cold chill of winter ceased to exist
Nothing can rid the fiery heat
of this beautiful fireplace of each other.

The pain is exhilarating.
It feels as though my body has sunken into a dull state.
With one word my skin can crumble.
I am distant from the reality of myself.
I can go to a bad place.
A place where I'm comfortable
Simply because there's nothing to be comfortable about.
I can go away.
It may be called bad,
But it feels so empty
It's full.

You hand me flowers
I giggle in glee

You say you love me
I trust in you

You show me the world
I gasp in awe

You care for me through the worst
I feel nothing but comfort

The flowers died
The ones you gave me.

You left me cold
You're love was not true.

You took my all
Then you cut me with your saw.

The worst was yet to come
I've never been so hurt.

You told me you loved me more
I showed you the meaning of more.