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it had to be her
didn't it
it ******* had
to be
her
-
Having Heaven is over rated anyway.
You could exhaust ecstasy.
Never mind nirvana.
You torment me with your bashful bliss.
Nothing could ruin this rapture.
I'm Preforming in Purgatory trying to win you over.
I can smell and taste the way you shake.
Posed on the bed as my knees quake.
I can here the CD spin in the player.
I think to myself  "****, I want to lay with her".
You're no longer in my sensory.
Now you're just a memory.
Sand paper bags scratch empty city streets, like nails on chalkboards.  It’s amazing how silence can be scary.  I gaze upon empty playground grass, the rampant, rapacious children are no longer able to climb jungle gyms to be king of the world.  Why?  I believe someone invited the Devil to dinner. He scorched earth and burnt tears in barren city streets, I alone see the beauty in the destruction.  Amongst anguish and anger, lies pure serenity.  An ending is just as beautiful as a beginning, like light to files, I’m addicted to pain.  If you’ll allow me, I’d like to show you how demise is perfect.  It’s starts with a smile, broken.  Too many demons spiting languages of hot lava that sounds similar to the solar maximum, It’s my mind that breaks from reality.  Unstable and unappreciated, pain is the only way I can rid the stress, So I have believed.  Starting like a headache, addicting like ****** or cough syrup, The rush of blood spiraling round my upper thigh is something I used to look forward to,
It was the only thing I could say I did for myself.  
Moments spilled into months, months pouring into one self-inflicting year, If only I could show the buckets I filled with the sadness I was afraid to share with the world.  I finally put the blades away when I made a mother watch her baby boy dig scissors into his wrists.  Rosy-red cheeks and rain-drop tears slipping down her face was enough to know I could I do better. I needed to do better.  So, I washed the blood away, erasing every past memory I thought I should regret.  I know life is no ethcy-sketch, the marks I once was proud of bare the same weight of shame.  I consider my addiction to be my savior.  If I never landed on rock bottom, I would never know the power it takes to stand back up.  Now I wake among empty city streets, Sand paper bags sit silently, It’s amazing how silence can be comforting.  I alone see the beauty behind the monster that tore apart my freckled canvas. I look at the Devil in the mirror.
Dinner is finished.
 Dec 2012 Aaron McDaniel
ck
Nothing.
 Dec 2012 Aaron McDaniel
ck
I don't know what I care about.
What I don't care about.
I'm taking a break from this paper,
that I certainly don't care about,
nor do I not care about.
So this is it.
These words on this paper.
This is what stresses.
How ******* stupid.
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