I have the tendency to leave
I get too overwhelmed often, my mind
stops working and all i see is darkness in front of my eyes
As I somehow make the best and worst decisions of my life at the same time
Ok fine I spit fire from my mouth everytime someone triggers me
But have you ever really tried to understand what made me like this?
All I can do is try and try to make everyone understand
But it's always the person's fault who made the other one cry
I may sound like a narcissist, But would you really put up with someone's ****, after tolerating it a million freaking times?
Just because I get the last word, How is it my fault?
How did everyone foreshadow all the moments of forgiveness and empathy that I expressed
But it's always my fault, my fault for putting up with people and their *******
And yeah I'm ******* selfish if that means that I can protect myself from something that alters my peace
I'm also aware about the fact that I'm just gaslighting myself too, as they say I do to everyone
But God, would you ever look at it from my point of view?
Years of living in the shadow of people who ridiculed and bullied me
How could you expect that person to not respond to even the threat of something like this?
But it's always my fault
I'm sorry it's my fault for even existing
Because every good thing i do is forgotten
And every bad thing that I do Is thrown at my face every single day.
More like a rant than a poem but yes.