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it's 8:19 pm on a friday night
and i'm inside wondering about everything not human
i wonder if butterflies have social calendars
and if any of them are ever left out by their counterparts
or if blades of grass have issues with their parents
and if their father tells them they better straighten up
or else they'll be cut to bits by the lawn mower
or perhaps if the moon has anxiety
over all the little things it illuminates
during the dark hours of the night
maybe the tide feels uneasy
washing away shattered dreams
and long forgotten kisses
that have been shared upon its shores
i wonder if bumblebees really care about anything
other than collecting pollen
or if all they really want
is to come home and let their wings rest
for maybe just a minute
maybe birds care for more than just their children
and finding food and shelter for the day
i wonder if they ever have disputed with each other
or ever look down upon us humans
and wonder why we're leading lives
we don't want to lead
you see i wonder if everything on this earth
that's not a human being
wonders about us
about why we care so much
and perhaps why we care too little
i wonder if they notice the pain that emanates from our hearts
i wonder if they can feel the slow drag in our step
i wonder if they know
that we would rather be anything
other than ourselves
i wonder
My mother tried to send herself to hell,
and in turn, my sister did the same.
Only, my sister succeeded,
at 11:03 am, there for the eyes
of her five year old child.

You see, I’ve never known poverty
or what it’s like to drive a used car
because we bathed in money
to drown out the sorrows,
and we tossed our spare change in garbage cans
to try and lose the devil.

What if Shakespeare’s not right,
and all the demons aren’t here?
What if my sister plunged herself into a hole
filled with all of her darkest fears?
I swear to God himself, I hope he’s right,
because I can’t, I can’t, I can’t,
I can’t even imagine.
i find the right key
and unlock the front door.
i am greeted by the silence
that was filled by you a few years before.

i sit on the edge of the sofa
the one you used to sleep on.
i close my eyes;
i see you there again.

coughing and painful cries
echo in my ears.
you reach for the machine
which once helps you breathe.

i open my eyes,
and you disappear.
the silence is depressing.

i wish you were still here.
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