People people, get down on your knees
Come come, kiss the apostle's feet
We'll tell you of a man if you give us just a tad bit of time
Give us your life, and we'll tell you how to get to your ancestors time
We'll tell you of purpose, it's up there for sure
You just have to reach out and grasp it, but your soul is the fare
If you lest the firey brimstone of beneath your gods feet, his creation he shall not repeat.
Your contract is here, sign at the bottom and you will find purpose near
You will live after living, and find purpose there, you dumb humans, why are you looking everywhere but right here

I try not to let my worries ruin my days
All my thoughts are appealing but I don't know what to feel in my bones
My flesh melts away every day I live in this town
Every blank face and every dim light street light frown I see around

I want you to make me struggle
Everything's so easy, I'm seeing double
But now I'm neutral here, floating in this bubble
Let the narcissism ensue, let me peak, and then I'll be back, I'll be troubled
Thinking about the hundreds of things you never said out loud, but mumbled

You freckle your face year after year until your age is near
Till the clarity of your face is crowded with fear

All your memories are scars of brown
Your face is like a galaxy
I look into it and see things that happened years before, and I could never know what you're thinking now
I could never get to know every little thing about you
I could never know you, I could never be what you want completely
Because that's a question not even you could answer
And it plagues me like brain cancer

Everybody's got a different definition of love
Everybody thinks you can only love once
But everybody's so different, how can you not see the possibility for love
How can you not see that one is not enough

Light a blue incense cause that's just the way I'm feelin'
Think I should hang something on my walls
Maybe It'll help me forget

The way your eyes held mine
They remind me of the grass
Helps me forget all the hassle

Your hearts wearing armor, I can here it when
You climb on top of me
Just trying to learn to love and let free
It's just not that easy
With the way you're looking at me

And now you're gone like the impossible
Like what I think about when we die
If we were to be separated by space-time
And you're your own universe
And I haven't found a wormhole

My temples are turning into ruins
My brain is churning into fluid
Can't comprehend your post modern physics
Feels like I'm being bombarded by playback ballistics

I'm a broken record but I wish you'd still spin me

I think you think to much without doing
And when you're on the brink of it, it's enduring

It comes to you in a different light, but you're on auto pilot and that's the flight
Till you land and if you lost your sight, you can't let yourself think anything but that you're the one who's always right

Let's believe that you're okay, that's the impression you give off when you pretend to pray
There's something you know you want, but all the delegates vote praise nay
So fragile flower won't you let love and lay
Stop thinking so much, just give praise to every day

I'm on autopilot
So I can talk to myself
Stop trying to hack into me
I need the space
Maybe I'll never come out
But if you break the circuit
Between me and my robot
You're not going to like what you see

There's a connection buzzing in the back of my earpiece
I can hear static voices trying to reach through to me
But I don't know how to tune the connection
I'm not even looking for the dial

So I threw your voice against the wall
It's always been hard when you're in a hole
I'm trying to guide this plane, but I'm just descending
Never thought I'd need a co-pilot
Never thought I'd hear again

Till I heard your voice speaking from the corner of my room, "I love you"
When I'm naked on the ground, confused
You taught me how to walk again, you gave me shoes
This is seven-twenty-seven three to ground control, I think I'm going to be okay

It's funny my phone started dying after I read that, like it knew how I felt
Like all the things unsaid were now said, but were still unsatisfactory
And I wanted you to say more and more was always too much for you
And it'd be too much for me if I had a filter anyways

Tell me I'm going too far because I can't
Tell me I'm everything you want, because part of me wants to become something you shant
Because it's perfect for you, but I know you've got pockets full of sand
You try to grab on but everything sifts through your hands

Sleep on sleep on, so I can pretend you live alongside while I dream on, dream on your bedside
Tease me until we're unsatis factories

I want to have kids, beautiful, beautiful children with someone I love one day.

You call me cold
But I'll let you be the one checking for a pulse
I guess we're not getting back together, things aren't just on hold
That'll be the last night I **** your loneliness away
After this I hope your investment pays
Off
Because I hope he's everything I'm not cough
I'm not the only one at a loss

Maybe he'll have fun trying to repair every little part of you I ****** up, and maybe he'll give you his friends, and let you climb inside of his life, and maybe he'll regret it all. I hope you find me in him.

I just want to know why you can't make your own friends and get your own life
Why do you have to stick around
Like you're the only ******* blip in town

What I don't get is why he'd try to include me in it
Try and hold my hand while he's holding yours? What a ******* strategy you sad *******
Maybe you can be the one to **** her loneliness away
Leaves me wondering why I put up with this every ******* day

I don't regret much, but I wish I never met you

Wish I had somebody to kick it with
Said I wanted to be alone, but it already felt like she wasn't there
I guess she was everything just to be fair
Had somebody who loved my writing but wouldn't read my poetry
Liked that she knew where to find it but never looked
But it felt like she didn't care, it left me crooked, --no entry--
Just sitting here in my room weeping like a bent tree
Feel like a ******* baby cause she took my nook
She had it in her hand but she never read my book

Now I'm actually alone, don't know how I like it though
Thought it would give me room to prosper and grow
Now I find myself walking the streets just to clear my mind --to and fro--
Miss your letters, when my phone would light up --new messages--
I'd put it back in my pocket, hiding behind these electronic hedges
Summer's not for lovers, summer's easy, I need that cold to help me struggle
Make me hide in my room, I need saving, get me out of my bubble
I'm too far away, space telescope, hubble trouble

You said you cried everyday since
Not one tear has left my eyes, they're empty
Couldn't tell you why, I'm just waiting cause time's tempting
Told you I loved you, couldn't tell you if it meant a thing
Couldn't tune you like a guitar, the string snaps every time
Tried to care about you, but you only cared about you too
Thought I cared about you, till I distilled the glue
That kept us together, I'm sick of this old ****, try something new

Had to get out, have to numb until I find myself out
I saw her out, and I saw her out, and I saw her out
And I've seen to many her's, in between all the meaningless musical blurs
And all the lies I'm telling her in my bed while I listen to Handsome Furs
Music's quite amazing when it can make you feel something you do not
Thought I was king of my mind, then I find something else to think about and my brain's back to the grind, just trying to figure it out
Now everything that's behind me is something I've fought
I sound like some *** who's like "It's more complicated than that"
It always is, everybody's calloused, like all the tattoos you got
Keep it all in, let your personality rot

Wish the what if's would stop bluffing me too
Need to start counting cards to win
I'm too distracted to let you under my skin
I don't even know how to play the game
But hey I'll play 52 pick up with you

It's all the time we've wasted now wasted
It's all the times we got wasted, we wouldn't remember anyways
It's all the areas of gray laced in the spaces inbetween
It's that night the thunderstorm became a breeding ground for our love
It's where you told me to leave, it's where push came to shove      
It's the bicycle I road into hell
It's your hair in the fire as we rode out of every argument we've ever had
It's all the meds you've swallowed from under your bed
It's everything you've locked up inside that shed
It's the ghosts and the ghouls and the heads
It's all of the mysteries you've left me inbetween
It's your aptitude to love and leave

My heads like a magazine
Skimming through all the pages like "What's all the fuss."
And making up the rest of it
I guess that's part of the buzz
Like a silly love song about something that never was
That's what my mind does
But it's never ambitious enough to fall on love

Art is not made for you
Art is not made for thyself
Art is made within itself
That's real passion

I wish that I was art.

I'll deal with tomorrow, tomorrow I say
Leave me, leave me in bed, motionless to lay
There's too much going on in my head
It's turning every black and every white into gray

Chaos cripples my feet like the dead of the night
Everything that was once in my grasp is out of my sight
They tell me it's self humiliation
But I'd like to disagree, I'd like to say it's self retaliation

The parting of the seas between a mind so split already only creates a slightly different replica of me
And then I'm one layer deeper
I can't find the way out, and the more I think about it, and the more I try to separate myself from the things that make me, I get farther away, now I can't even see the sea

So if you ever see that sea, plunge into it for me.

Save me.

If you asked me to give you the picture
I couldn’t even paint her
This girl’s got me on retainer
Her purse is full of my pastels and pens, and I don’t quite consider myself an entertainer
And every stroke of my tongue comes out as a castrated slur
Yet on my way to hers
I trample through a trail covered in burs
They are stuck on me, but I am undoubtedly stuck on her

This is ****** poetry

I am alone.

You are not here.

My lover is gone.

She abused me.

I still love her.

I fear the future.

I fear the past.

The present is beyond my control

I want her back

She will abuse me again

Is the abuse worth it

I want it to be

I don't know if it is

How long can love outweigh ignorance

Does it matter in the end

Does the pain make it worth it

Why is your attention so addicting

Your love is more destructive and addicting than any drug I've ever consumed

My life is in your hands

I need help

All of the above is true

This is a ****** poem

The likes of you like the likes of those that like back like the likes of incestual narcissists
Social bureaucrats fat with pride, well, they're at the top of the pyramid
Nymphos, narcs, all the same, addicts that are only concerned with what they can gain
Symbiotic, sympathetic, and synchratic all built on a foundation of disdain
So life is too complex, simplify the pain
Cover it up because unhappiness is disgustingly profane

So pray to God, say "let us *******"
Then paint the mirror to assimilate
Lift weights, swipe dates, scale 1 to 10, "don't forget to rate"
Because whether or not we'd like to admit it, our culture treats sadism as a desirable trait

Alpha on alpha on alpha, apparently we have all evolved - to a point in which everyone thought the world revolved
If only technology had not built a wall
Natural selection would have it's pick, and the hive mind would inevitably fall

Let's become eachothers excuse to lay our bodies to waste and then to rest.
In love and war, do you attest?

Death is the absence of life
Dying gives meaning to life

Here I am 6' 2" you 5' 4" a molten core knocking on that cellar door like Drew Barrymore
LET ME OUT!

You furnished these cobwebs like Forbes magazine modern decor telling me how to feel about seasonal arrangements.. and small minimalistic hipster houses.. ****.
For every smile I'd be lucky to see, you were ready to implore

Red and black plaid flannel you caught my eye and then my soul
Don't know how many times little miss blondie from the shore is going to make me tell this story.. ****.
The things a person will do to you when they need you are unfair.
There's no warning signal when you're ensnared..
****.
Where's my magazine?

I know that death is a part of life
But why does it seem like a shadow with every strife
Where is the end, why are we living
Are we ready to be adults yet

It's hard to live and let live when you
Love and can't let go
It's hard to grow when you know you're getting closer
To and fro the end is a mystery

You can't make rights nor wrongs
You can only make history
What works for me
Doesn't work for you
But why do we care if we never make it through

I want to love you and let go
Never want to grow up
Never want to be left alone
If history's all we can make
Then I want to be known

To feel this sad means you must have at once felt so happy.

Isn't that comforting?

Imagine a place
Suspended in time
Everyday's the same
But we're spending it differently

Let's toy with the stars
Get stuck in infinity with me
Kiss the ground
And live forever

I can feel the mass of your heart
As it pulls me in
I can feel the passing of the cars
As you grasp my arm

Can't see a thing
But I feel your hot breath
And the stars begin to scream
Your eyes are planets
They are beams
They're pouring into me

"Everything before us has put us here," I say
"How I met you here in a sea of people, it's like I've had faith, it feels like something I could only pray."
I say, "If there's any falter in the skies, any mishaps on this earth, that have caused our existences to clash, I'm happy for them and everything that caused them."
"When I look at you I learn more about myself, and when you talk it strikes a match inside of me. It's the warmest feeling I've ever felt."
"The wars, the massacres, the deaths, the scars, the endless drinks at every bar, they've led to this darling."
"I hope one day you can see the things that I see."
"I hope one day you believe in you and me."

You move I move, scandalous, something to prove
Pretending to be who is who, who is you, who is me, woah is you
And I’m new to new, but I can’t seem to fit into the groove
There is black and there is blue, and when the sky turns back in lieu
Cash turns into change, and so do you

Coloring rocks, watching kickball, and lying in the grass
I saw your glance, I looked away as you made about
Swaddled infatuation, feelings thought dead years ago
Unknown anxieties implore me, should I talk to her?
I hope that I get paired with you

Courage strikes me, your smile, your laugh, I’m young again
The others think I’m in over my head, and maybe I do too
Where did this feeling come from, from so long ago
Maybe I’m in love — I don’t know
But I’d be happy forever here, as long as I’m with you
I hope I get paired with you

Saturday
- [x] Workout
- [x] CVS
- [x] Tokyo Mart
- [x] Milk
- [x] Stockings
- [x] Cork town beard butter
- [x] Nicole gift
- [x] Krazy Jane’s
- [ ] I want you to love me with the force of one thousand winds