I do not like this job
no not one bit,
I do not like this job
no, in fact, not at all!
I would not work this in a school
or in a pool,
I would not work this in the hall
or at the mall!
I do not like this job
no not at all!

16 hours prior I worked until my mind and hands were numb,
3 hours of rest later I return to duty
and feeling all the more dumb!

Favors on favors
to what end do they accrue,
When favors on favors are stacked against you?

Either give me rest
so that I may do my best,
or sit down with me
and pay the fee
but my patience, do not test.

Come often the days
that I think about her
come often the days
that go like blur.

Come often the days
that I can not recall,
Come often the days
that do not feel so tall.

Come often the days
where the seasons come to pass,
come often the days
that are so precious and fragile like glass.

Come often the days,
yet not often enough,
they will come and go
in a hurry and a huff.

Not enough time
to do as I must,
to say what I need to say,
to the people I trust.

Come often
the Days.

I don't care to admit
that I was stuck between
my dreams and reality
something between a haze and insanity.
So listen well,
to this story of my heart.
But where, oh where
Do I start?

From the beginning I suppose
would be best
to tell you a story of a young man's quest.
See, when I was younger, the prime of my youth
I was in search of something
something akin to the truth.

Of what it would have been like
to be accepted as a person again,
in another strange place
when even stranger people back then.

You see, this was all way back when
back in my university days
when I had few cares in the world
and when I had much more...of a craze.

So days go by
and friends I would make a plenty.
Yet even so,
I had felt so empty.

Now mind you, I've never felt any happier still
being surrounded by such an awesome loving atmosphere
and the friendliest folks you could ever meet, if you will.

Skipping the details of my life
in essence, at the time, I came to realize
I had been searching all this time
for a wife.

See I didn't want a high school fling
which was all for fun
but not for the ring.
I pride myself when I say
I am not that kind of guy.
So I suppose I can say why
I felt so lonely inside.

In my uni days,
surrounded by lovebirds so sickeningly, maddeningly in love
I had once treated with disdain and disgust
but if only to hide the embarrassment of raging jealousy
through my lack of trust.

Skipping ahead a few years now,
aye, years has it been
oh and how.

I often wondered of my dilemma between my dream of mine.
A wonderful, beautiful, lovely dream, that I can scarcely define.

With the voice of an angel,
skin as fair as one expects one to be
with a joyous compassion, that could make anyone happy!
She has a smile that could light up the world on the darkest of nights alone,
she has one of those smiles you could hear over the phone.

And can she sing! Mercy me, why the greatest choirs couldn't possibly hope to trap her voice! As the sun does give man the comfort of its warmth and bids the plants to grow
Does her voice bring the deaf to hear and the mute to speak GLORY BE!
She is the like the youth of my life,
free, innocent, and ever so happy.
She brings joy to everyone she meets
where ever she may go.
She follows her passions, her dreams, and her faith for sure
for all of this and more, is one of the many reasons why I adore.

But even after so many seasons,
and so many reasons,
I just can't bring my self to ask this dream of mine,
I just can't ask her what I need to say,
I just can't ask her...
to stay.

She is a dream that wanders in my life
like the tides of the ocean blue.
She floats in my mind like a dainty bauble
so pretty
so true.

But she is a dream I just can not reach
so dreaming
will have to do.

This is the dream I know
and I know one day
I'll have
to let
her
go.

In the face of adversity
in trials and tribulation
I find my self wondering
just who or what could be my salvation?

In the face of battle
in strife and depravity
I find my self looking
for anyone else else standing with me.

In the face of defeat
while certain and impossible to stop
I will not hang my head low
my bitter tears I shall not show.

I may sweat, and I may bleed
but in the end of it all
I swear by my honor in life,
and glory unto death,
I will be freed.

I try to do right
by as many folks as I can meet.
But every other turn,
I end up in defeat.

I can't put down my foot
on any subject, matter or cause
and turn the other cheek?
Feels like a heavy sock to my jaws.

I am burdened by loyalty,
and tasked to capacity.
But still they ask more of me?
What should I have done?

"Yes ma'am, Yes Sir, three bags full sir."
I signed a contract, and away with my rights
I'm too placid and too eager to please
to pick out my own fights.

I should have said no,
I should have not went, when they said "Go!"
I should have left when I had the chance.

Now to face the music
and go on with this dance.

It's hard to forget
the times we had
the laughs we shared
and all the things we did.

All the questions we asked
and the hell we raised
and the times that made you
so special.

It's hard to forget
who you are
and how you did the littlest things.

It's hard to forget where we went
all the adventures we had
and the things we've seen and the people we met along the way.

And why.
Why you did what you did.
But sometimes the hardest questions I have
to face are the same ones I had asked the first time.

Who are you now, that I don't see you any more?
Who have you become?
How are you?
Are you safe, are you loved, are you enjoying life like I remember you did?
Where are you?
Would you let me visit if I could? Or would you want me as far as possible?
And Why?

The biggest question is...why?

Why is it so hard to forget those you remember?

I've so much to ask
and I know we've so little time together as it is
just as it was back then.

I hope to see you just one more time,
I hope to see you again,
Now the final question is...
When?