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May 2020 · 121
My Happiness!
Vera Rice May 2020
I find happiness in all the weirdest places that nobody can ever imagine to look, people find it to be dumb, I love being with the man of my dreams even though he is a redneck, ill-tempered, foulmouthed, raises cain at people who deserve to be put into their rightful place and he's downright truthful. He speaks his mind and his peace whether they like it or not.

Some people think all of those things are wrong in somebody but to me, all of those things make him perfect for me. I love all of his special faults to be his perfection beyond doubt. I love him for who he is and for all he can be.

He thinks I'm perfect just the way I am, I'm true to myself, to him, he loves my ******* mouth, my temper, my tears, my fears and most of all he thinks I'm beautiful to the point of making him lose his mind and thoughts.

To me he hung the moon and stars for me, he makes all my dreams come true and I'm his one and only. To him I'm his angel who saved him, his beautiful queen who has his back no matter what, who will give him anything he wants, I'm his reason for getting up every day and facing a  world that doesn't want to understand or even take the time to get to know the real him, where I do understand and know every wonderful thing about him that makes him so great and unique.


He tells me that I'm his dream come true, he can't and won't picture his life without me. He told me that if I ever left him, he would come after me and bring me back no matter what because I mean the world to him, he never had a woman like me before, a faithful, honest, trustworthy, kind, ****, beautiful and downright crazy as hell.

I would **** for him, die for him, fight for him, and above all, I will always love him and never betray him in any way. He is my world, my happiness, and my one true love. Next to him stands my other happiness and that is our children.

Even though his children were not born from my body, they are still my kids, even though my daughter isn't his she still is his daughter also. These are all my happiness, that some people think is dumb to them and those people will never ever know what real bliss or a blessing is in their lives because they don't know and they don't have the courage to find out what real happiness means in this world. By: Vera Rice
May 2020 · 80
My Greatest Fear!
Vera Rice May 2020
I never would have ever dreamed that one day I could lose my mother, sister, niece, and nephew. Until one day my greatest fear came like a thunderstorm in one fateful day.

My day started like normal I got up had coffee, played a few games on my phone spending time with my husband, then I was making a very important phone call about a bill. My baby sister beeped in not thinking it was important and I would call her back later after my bill phone call.

When she beeped in the second time with my bill phone call, I was upset with her and I switched to her call and I screamed out at her. I said what twice until finally, I said hello, she said ***** mama is fine but nobody knows how Missy is doing.

She started to tell me that they had been hit head-on by a drunk driver, I couldn't listen anymore and I handed the phone to my husband who had to tell me everything after the phone call. I jumped on the web and started calling a lot of hospitals but I couldn't find the one they were in.

Finally, my husband told me to use my head, to calm down and think carefully for a moment, I did what he told me to and I got on Facebook and seen my big sister's post and I called her to find out that she had shattered her knee, our mother was in ICU with a fractured c-vertebrae in her neck, a fractured heel on her driving foot five broken ribs and to top it all of her lungs collapsed on her.

I couldn't listen to my big sister my husband had to get the information for me because I couldn't stand the thought of losing my mother, I was told that my niece and nephew was okay that they only had bruises from the crash and that they were with my stepdad who had ***** me at the tender age of twelve.

Later that night I talked to him and he told me that my niece and nephew were in Children's hospital in Columbus, Ohio. I called the hospital and talked to my niece and found out she had a broken arm, and that my nephew only had bruises from the crash.

They had me come up to Ohio to help them until they could walk without support and be able to drive themselves to their therapy. It took them two months to get better, now their ability to help themselves without me. Now that I know that I could lose my mother because she isn't invisible that she is and has always been fragile.

That is one day I could have lost her forever, it would **** me to lose my mother, not only because she is the one who gave birth to me because she has always protected my big sister, my baby sister and me from the beatings of mine and my baby sister's father. She was always wiping my tears away when I was sad when I was a little girl.

She would always kiss my booboos away, she would sing and read me to sleep. She always seemed to be invisible to me, nothing could and never would ever hurt my mother, including death. Death couldn't even touch my mother, but I got the biggest wake-up call in my life when I could have lost her.

She isn't perfect by no means and she wasn't the greatest mother ever, she has beaten me to she has blamed me for things that weren't my doing, she left me and my baby sister alone without food for two weeks at a time. I became a mother at the age of twelve to my baby sister, but with all of the things she did in the past I still love my mother and I don't ever want to lose her, if it came down to my mother and my father, it would hurt me more to lose my mother than my father and both of my sister's agree with me wholeheartedly.

My father and my big sister's father are pieces of ****, but we still love them, but we just love our mother more. So I have faced my greatest fear and I can proudly say that I still have my mother here with me thank God.
I never want to feel that scared feeling of thinking that I almost lost my mother, my big sister, my niece, and my nephew.

I can sleep peacefully knowing that their alive, well, and still with me. By: Vera Rice!
I wrote this just recently after I found out that my family is doing alright
Vera Rice May 2020
These last two months have to be hell for me, one being away from my one and only love of my life and our home. The second being my family getting hit by a drunk driver head-on, I went up north to Ohio to help them out because they needed me. I had to put my life, my plans to get my daughter back and getting a car for us since our transmission went out in our car.

It was hard being away from my one and only love of my life and our home together for these last two months, we talked every day, we video chatted and we would text and play games together. But I wanted to be home with him, to touch him, kiss him and make love with him.

Somedays I wanted to cry myself to sleep, scream my brains out, yell at the world over my pain and depression of being away from my one and only love of my life and our home. But I'm a strong woman who can keep calm, pretend that everything is Humpty dory and fake smile at my family and they don't even know that it's all a put on.

I did that a lot for the last two months pretending to be happy spending time with them, fake smile so they won't really know that I was miserable being there and I would pretend to like being with them. And all the while wishing I was going home and hoping that day was coming quickly, my family has a habit of trying to get me to leave my one and only love of my life. Plus they try to control me still even though they can't anymore.

I wish they would stop doing that to me, I'm my own person and I'm an adult who can make up her own mind and my feelings are my own. They don't need to tell me how to feel or think.

They are starting to hate me for who I have become, I stand up to them when they start bad mouthing my one and only love of my life, they don't like it when I stand up for myself to them, they can't stand my ******* remarks about how I feel and what I think about how they treat me.

I have repeatedly told them where my heart belongs and that I will be with my one and only love of my life whether they like it or not, I don't care if they like it or not it's my life and I'm a big girl who knows what she wants and I'm not scared to fight to keep my one and only love of my life.

My family can either accept my decision or they can kiss my big white behind goodbye, I'm not afraid of kicking them out my life. After all, I did it to my dad who doesn't want anything to do with me anymore.

I have no love lost on my part when it comes to my dad, so I'm hoping that my family will finally accept my decision about my one and only love of my life. And that they would be happy for me because I have a great man who loves me with every fiber of his being and I love him the same way.

We would die for each other, we will fight for each other and when we team up we are an unstoppable and unbreakable pair. We will never stop trying to make my family realize that we belong together and that our love will never ever be stopped or crushed by them or anyone who tries to break us apart.

Once we were forced apart by my family, kept from each other for many years and we always found ourselves brought back to each other by fate. Now we are together and nothing will rip us apart ever again, because we will move heaven and hell to stay together, that's how much our love means to us.

Family be ******, strangers are double ******, exesaaree tripled ****** and the law can kiss our ***** because if they try to tear us apart we will hunt them down and blow them away to nothingness, and we won't even blink twice when we do blow them away with our rage. We are what some people would call 'Soulmates,' to others we could be called crazy people. Hell we even can be called the dynamic duo, we're Joker and Harley Quinn our love is eternal, and it can't be stopped or destroyed by anybody. By: Vera Rice!
May 2020 · 61
My Vows!
Vera Rice May 2020
You make my heart beat faster at the thought of you, my heart skips a beat every time you look at me. You make my belly do flips when you kiss my neck from behind, I love it when you put me on lock down when we're in bed together. 
I love holding you in bed to but I love you holding me more, the way you hold me it's like your scared of losing me. You have nothing to worry about because I'm only yours, but please never stop holding me like that because I love it to much.
   I love everything about you from your soul to your 
heart, your my dream come ture. I've been yours since I was twelve years old and I'll always be yours nothing will take me away from you. I'm your Angel from God and your my angel,  you make me so happy to the point that I can't think sometimes. You take my breath away with a smile, kiss and touch. 
I can't image my life without you at all, I miss you when your not here I sleep beside my phone just to make sure I hear your phone call from you. When you finally call me everything else just doesn't matter to me because I'm on cloud nine when it comes to you, when your home I just want all of your attention on me to the point where I can't think anymore. 
Because you mean everything to me, you complete part of my whole being. The other part of my whole being belongs to my baby girl who also loves you to, you became her dad when her real dad doesn't even there for her or cares  about her at all; that just makes me love you even more.
By: Vera Rice!
Vera Rice May 2020
She first met the love of her life at the sweet tender age of twelve, he was a sixteen-year-old country redneck .of a young man. She had worked up the courage to tell him her name but on that one small ounce of courage, she didn't only tell him her name she told him a full dialogue of her life.
Embarrassed with herself she turned around and walked away from him, telling herself that she was an idiot figuring that he would never want to talk to her at all. For her it was love at first sight, to her surprise after a week he started talking to her, what's more, he was having her deliver his love letters to his girlfriend. Until one day he gave her a letter not for his girlfriend but for her, her heart skipped a beat when she went home.
The letter was short and straight to the point it said, 'Do you like me? Because I like you check yes or no.' It was a dream come true for her so of course, she checked yes, they started going out with each other until her mother found out about it and spilled them up.
The last time she saw him was on her front porch where they danced, kissed and he told her that he loved her. It was eleven years later when they met up again, she had already had a daughter by an ex-boyfriend who kicked them out for a neighbors wife.
They started dating again and now they have been together for four years, at first everything was going great and then he started to change. He now wants to have another woman join them in their bed because that is what he is used to, she doesn't want that but she'll do it for him to make him happy. Her happiness is just being with him and having her daughter also, but sometimes he makes her doubt his love for her. On more than one occasion he told her that he couldn't picture his life without her, he went one step further once by saying if she walked out of their house he would chase her and hunt her down because she means the world to him. 
She believes him to a degree but at the same time, she has her doubts about what he says because he has already repeatedly broken her heart and almost her spirit with it. She might just put him to the test one day.
By: Vera Rice!
May 2020 · 128
The Cracked Armor!
Vera Rice May 2020
She wore a whole suit of armor around her heart and soul that nobody could come through to cause her fear, suffering, and pain, she wouldn't have it let alone permit it to happen so she never let people see to the heart of her soul.
She first started wearing the suit of armor as a child, she continued to keep it polished and strong all of these years it had worked like a charm. Family, and friends all thought they knew her heart, soul, thoughts, and feelings. 
But the truth of the matter is nobody really knew her at all, they were just trying to tell her how to think and feel because they thought they were so smart. She thought it was funny at how they assumed that they knew her when in truth they didn't, all thanks to her polished strong suit of armor that she wore.
She believed with her whole heart and soul that nobody would ever come past her polished strong suit of armor that she wore, she found out just how naive she really was one day.
It just wasn't anybody no this person was the only person who has always had her heart from their very first meeting of each other, she continued to try and keep her suit of armor polished and strong even though she was with her love.
But to her greatest surprise and dismay, she didn't notice anything wrong until it was way too late, her love had already put a crack in her polished strong suit of armor that she wore to protect herself with. No matter how much she tried she couldn't fix the crack in her polished strong suit of armor that she wore, the damage was already done and her love had already seen through to her heart and soul.
By: Vera Rice!
A poem for all the strong women out there who feel weak in front of their brave knights
May 2020 · 85
Dream Come True!
Vera Rice May 2020
He was everything she ever wanted or dreamed of in a man he was honest, trustworthy, charming, caring, loving, loyal and most of all hardworking. Plus he would encourage her to pursue her dreams, to her surprise, it didn't take her long to fall in love with him after all he was her dream come true.
She was everything he ever wanted and dreamed of in a woman she was kind-hearted, loyal, honest, trustworthy, daring when she wanted to be, sassy if she had to be and hardworking. But there was one thing he found so fascinating about her that made him happy beyond belief, she only had eyes for him and him alone. When he fell in love with her without any doubts what so ever in his mind about his strong feelings towards her, after all, she was his dream come true also.
All their close friends, family, and strangers they meet on the street they all are so envious of their love for each other. They all just wished and prayed for a love like theirs, their dreams come true.
By: Vera Rice!
This  is for all the lovers whose dreams has come true for them
Vera Rice May 2020
I knew I loved you before I knew you were to be born, I made life long promises to you before I knew you were to be born. I just couldn’t imagine just how much I would love you at that time until the day you were born, the moment I found out that I was going to be a mother I was shocked at first but when the shock wore off I was beyond joy.

I couldn’t wait for the day that I would finally meet you, to hold you in my arms, to kiss your beautiful head and to rock you to sleep. I was scared about breast breastfeeding you because of how top-heavy I am, so I decided to bottle feed you instead.

I took parenting classes to make sure that I would know how to care for you, I want you to have a better life then I did growing up. I will make sure that you do because I’ll make sure with all of my power that you do have a better life than me.

I’ll get you whatever you want and need all you have to do is ask me, you are my special and precious little baby girl. You claimed my heart for your own when you were born.

By: Vera Rice
This is for all us mother's who feel so much love for their bouncy babies
May 2020 · 187
My Ghost!
Vera Rice May 2020
I tried every day to run away from my ghost, that Haunts me in my dreams and when I'm awake. What did I do so wrong to have lost such a precious gift? I have tried not to blame myself for losing another baby inside my body, I have done everything I can not worry about it.
Even though I'm scared plum out of my mind, for the baby I'm carrying now I pray every day and night that everything is perfect with this precious Angel. I will keep trying not to worry about my ghost that is always haunting me.
The times I have to fight and face my ghost by myself is getting more and more each day I'm reminded of it more and more each day, It keeps coming to the surface reminding me of my pain and guilt all over again.
I'm sick and tired of pretending that I'm not hurting inside over my ghost, my pain and most of all my guilt, what's so funny is that nobody can help me. It's my cross to bear alone forever, so I'll patch up the holes that got ripped open anew again.
Where it made me feel my pain and guilt as well as facing my ghost again, I refuse to burden anyone with my ghost because it's mine to deal with, and I will suppress my pain and my guilt.
When I feel like I'm finally on equal ground with my ghost I will steel myself firmly and mentally to overpower my ghost, so I can lock it back up in the deepest and darkest place inside my body. Not even my pain or guilt will be able to bring my ghost back to the surface again, it won't be easy to get rid of my ghost but I'll try my hardest not to worry or stress over my ghost anymore.
By: Vera Rice!
This poem is about my inner haunting of losing a baby
May 2020 · 69
From Queen To The Maid!
Vera Rice May 2020
In the blink of an eye I went from being called the wife to now being called * or slave, it really hurts and cuts me all the way down to my soul. I once was important to you and now I'm just **** under your feet, I went from queen of the castle to the maid of the castle.
I gave you my heart freely without questioning your motives, I bared my deepest, darkest secrets, my weaknesses and my fears to you. You are the only one who has seen straight through to my soul, the only one who knows what's locked up inside of me buried deep within me wanting to escape it's a prison.
I showed you respect, you had my trust and I did whatever you told me to do. I have stood beside you as we lost two homes, I have been there for you when you kept going to jail and I made sure you always had money on your books if we had any. I have suffered with you through losing a baby, my little girl and your children getting adopted out.
I have snapped on mother
s for putting you down, people would come and tell me that you were * this woman and that woman, but I wouldn't believe them. In one of your mind playing tricks on you fazes you told me that you didn't want me, that you didn't love me and you left me at someone's house by myself, everybody was hearing what you were saying to me but I was reading your eyes. 
Which they were saying, 'I need you, I want you and I love you.' I bet you never knew that I've almost left you twice but I would stop and listen to what my heart had to say and it told me to stay so I did, and eventually things started to get better for us again. You were out of jail and you were clean until all of your old friends started hanging around you again. The last time you went to jail on me, they also took my *
with you. 
The whole six months you were in jail, not hardly ever did you not have money. I gave you all the money while I starved and ate out of the park's trash can, not once did I ever think about leaving you.
I have always been by your side through the bad times we had together when our good times came about they were a blast for us. Now we have hit another bad time when you ripped my heart out of my chest and broke it into a million pieces and then stepped on it to boot.
I will literally run myself rugged just to please you, even if I ended up sick or close to death's door in the progress of trying to make you happy. Hell I even had your back then and I still have it now, and what was my reward in return you break my heart into a million pieces and stepped on it to boot. I was so happy to be your queen but now I'm just a piece of *
** beneath your feet not even worthy enough to step on. By: Vera Rice!
I wrote this to let out my anger towards my husband one night after a disagreement we had
May 2020 · 67
My Beautiful Lori Rose!
Vera Rice May 2020
Since the first time I met you, spent time with you and talked to you I started to love you like you was my own daughter. I loved spending time with you, having you around, watching you and your dad laughing together.
Seeing him smile every time you came over to see us, hopefully, pretty soon you will stay the whole weekend with us by yourself. I dream of us being able to take you and Annabella out for family activities, plus other places also such as amusement parks, the zoo, and water parks too.
Where we all can have fun together as a family, riding rides and making wonderful memories together. You're a very smart, talented and beautiful young woman with a good head on your shoulders just like your dad. Don't let anybody tell you any different, and if they ever try to put you down anyway they can don't believe them.
They are just jealous of you because no one has ever taught them how to be kind to others less fortunate than themselves. You were taught to be kind, thoughtful and respectable towards others.
That makes you beautiful, caring and most importantly smarter than those idiotic people who think they are better than you when in truth they are just sad, miserable and just so pathetically lonely people.
Those types of people think if they make fun of you and bring you down, to the point of double questioning your own worth. Your dad keeps telling me the same thing, so I'm going to proudly pass it down to you and eventually to Annabella also.
I'm so thankful to have been apart of your life even if it was so quickly gone in a blink of an eye, but I wouldn't trade our short, sweet and bliss-filled six months for anything in the world.
I hope and pray that you will never forget that I might not have carried you beneath my heart like I did my daughter. But I want you to know that you hold a special place inside of my heart, and I'm so very proud to call you daughter.
In those short sweet six months with you, know that you became so very special to me. I loved watching you spend time with your dad since you never really got to know him. But for those short sweet six months that we had with you, there are precious memories now. I love you my sweet beautiful Lori Rose!
By: Vera Rice!
This poem is my feelings about my husband's First born daughter, my stepdaughter
May 2020 · 93
If My Heart Was A Violin!
Vera Rice May 2020
If my heart was a violin then you played the last string, you promised forever and I fell for your lies, I ain't gonna fall for them anymore you keep coming back with your arms open wide, but I don't need you so turn around and walk away.
    I've already said my final goodbye, I've cried my final tears for you I won't cry for you anymore I have someone new to cry for and love, somebody other than you someone to lean on someone true. Someone to take away all the pain, someone better than you.
      My wounded heart has found someone new it found completion and love in somebody's arms other than yours, my heart's already healed and found someone new. Someone better and true someone who wants me, someone who will fight for me. Someone who took my wounded heart for their own someone who will protect it with their arms and love.
        That someone is braver than you so turn around and walk away and find someone else's heart to play, mine found someone new I really don't need you so leave my heart alone. 
        Because it belongs to someone else, my heart won't pound for you anymore. It pounds for someone new someone other than you, so don't come back to me because I won't even look your way anymore my eyes will only look at my somebody new.
By: Vera Rice!
I wrote this poem about my honest feelings towards my ex
May 2020 · 58
When I Kissed Your Hand!
Vera Rice May 2020
When I kissed your hand my heart was finally complete when you looked up at me with your beautiful eyes my whole world was lit up bright. When I heard your cry it was the sweetest music to my ears I won't let anyone have you or hurt you, I will always protect you no matter what.
     I knew from the beginning that I loved you and I will always be there for you, I want you to know that you can tell me anything I will always listen to you no matter what so don't ever be afraid to tell me anything.
      You look like an angel you feel like one also, you will always be my sweet angel, please don't ever forget that my beautiful baby girl. I will always fight for you no matter what, your life will always be sweet I'll make sure of that my beautiful baby girl. Even if I have to hurt someone over you I will that is mommy's biggest ultimate promise to you, my beautiful baby girl.    
I love singing, dancing and reading to you as well as hearing you sing to me, you have a beautiful voice that makes mommy want to cry. Your a very smart, bright, and gorgeous girl who makes her mommy proud every day. I can tell you a lot but I know you don't want to hear it, so I will only say one thing to you, I love you, my beautiful baby girl, when I kissed your hand.
By: Vera Rice!
I wrote this poem before I ever thought of having a baby after my daughter was born I redone this poem just for her.
May 2020 · 91
My Prison Door!
Vera Rice May 2020
Who am I? I really don't know who my real self is, I have been locked up inside of myself with no way of escaping and no way to cry out for help either. Because my voice won't work and nobody can hear it, because it's buried really deep inside of me.
My real self has been locked  all my life, I never got to meet my real self. My family saw something inside of me that must have scared them because they were the ones who locked up my real self. They even gave me rules to obey and follow without asking any questions, the first rule I learned was 'you are not allowed to feel anything.'
It still sometimes feels like it applies even now, then the worst thing happened to me it was the day my prison door was shut and locked forever. I can never escape it because I don't have the power, then I found out that it was only going to get even more horrible for me.
My family gave me a title that I don't want and I despise it whole heartily, that title is 'I'm a good girl who does what she's told.' I have tried to escape many times over the years but to no avail, they always found me and returned me to my prison. Even now they still make sure that my prison door is safely locked, I don't think my family wants me to become one with my real self.
I think their sacred of my real self that's why they locked her up, I can hear her screaming to be set free from my prison door. I everyone sees is really just a shell of my real self, that my family locked away and threw the key away.
I think their sacred that if my real self was set free because they wouldn't be in control of me anymore. They wouldn't be able to manipulate me anymore either like they have been doing to my shell of my real self all my life.
My family would lose their personal playtoy and that makes them scared of my real self if she ever got free of my prison door that they locked her up in. By: Vera Rice
My poem is about my inner self that I would love to meet one of these days.

— The End —