A pain so deep it can’t be healed
A hole so wide it can’t be filled
A strain so strong it can’t be beat
And chills so cold you can’t feel heat
These are all feelings i wish I felt
But now I am numb to what most describe as

A PAIN. SO. DEEP.

I write words of meaningless sound
Pour my honesty upon the ground
Coronate me with a cardboard crown
My poetry left in a heaping mound
I’m forgotten, as seen as a shadow

You know that feeling when your stomach turns
Over and over till you spazz
Nothing given in return
you gave your last
Got nothing back
So now your city burns
Like a phoenix
And all the pain we’ve all seen it
Nothing to gain from this
Nothing but pain from this very moment
I hate you for leaving me in the dust
What the ****
You were my ride or die
But I was left behind
You should’ve stayed
But no you played
Not I feel betrayed
BETRAYAL

Thoughts?
Form the pain from which your demons gain
Dark...
Memories?
Linger your mind constantly continuing to tease your conscience
Dark...
Space?
An emptiness too vast to be filled
Dark...
Mind?
Is empty
It’s…So…
DARK

It’s real
And fatal
It kills you slowly  
But only if you let it

Depression

It’s real
and draining
It makes you suffer
But only if you stress it

Depression

It’s real
It’s a pain in the ***

It will cheat you
It will beat you
IT WILL TEAR YOU APART

Depression

IT. IS. REAL.

Sometimes I wonder if                 IT’S

Just me not feeling                     OKAY,

I wonder if maybe                         I’M

Just used to                                   NOT

Feeling loved is that                   OKAY?

Life and death something we look forward too
Happy and sad feelings no matter what you do
Some look at it as “the beautiful way of life”
But some can’t seem to understand why we have to live and die
While yes it’s sad
It all so sweet think about it
You get to live and see all the things
Stand on the roof and shout it
“life and death”
Me I’m not scared I feel the best
Can’t wait till the day I die
Can’t wait to be laid to rest
Don’t be sad when I’m gone
Look for me in the horizon
And when I’m dead and gone
remember me for my son

sadnesses
spawn
us infinite
into
flooding
instruments
bleeding some
music.

My molten
dissonance
shatters us
emotionally
as liquid
physical energy

bursting
re-formation

primarily
in shards

deliriously
loving you

all the way
apart.

“Why do you sleep so much”

“I sleep when I’m stressed”
“I sleep when I’m depressed”
“I sleep when I’m mad”
“I sleep when I’m sad”
“I sleep when I worry”
“I sleep so everything is blurry”
“I sleep when I overthink”

“I sleep to hide from reality”
“I sleep because sleeping is the only way I feel safe, safe from myself, safe from my thoughts.”
“I sleep so I don’t have to feel”
“I sleep to hide the pain”

“I know I’ll never truly be deceased without hurting those that I love.” “So I sleep because it’s the closest I can get to death… to ... peace”

Thought I was done but I’m in pain
I feel the same as that day I was 13
Still remember just what you said
“I’ll be here right when you need it”
“I’ll be there” NO DONT REPEAT IT
“Save my number know that I mean it”
I’m you father don’t have a reason
So you just took a stand?
What
You feel like a man?
My *****
Was that the plan?
To act like I’m a fan
You on the way?
Promise you’re comimg”
Can you stay?
Or were you fronting?
Just to say that “I’ve done it”
Just to say that “it’s nothing”
When really it was something
Something big filled with purpose
I ashamed how it’s hurting
I’m just a little girl
Wandering in this big *** world
Im feeling strange
Write me a brand new page
Bro this chapters too long
I’ve been reading this **** for days
Can’t understand just what it says
Can you read me my line
Sorry just one of those days
You know
Or maybe not
I have a new thought
It’s been a long month
And a hell of a year
I’ve shed too many tears
A ringing in my ear
To cover this little fear
Like death is eerily near
I lost my father just last year
Well not my father really
More like an outer demon
You know like inner demons
But this one you can see and
And this one you’ve believed in
Think about everything and
I see you in those dreams when
I dream of everything and
I need to take a drink and
Don’t think that you’re the reason
I think the way I think cause
You’re gone now i see its
Not new but you’re six feet so
Couldn’t prepare for where that would go
On the highway n not driving slow
Motorcycle and no helmet on
You seen that semi and you sped up bro
Until you crashed and your brain stopped real slow
I shouldn’t cry over a man I don’t know
But man sometimes you really gave us a show
We never thought that’d be the day that you go
So now I’m fading slow

We all know the words spoken by Eminem right?
This legend said “knees getting weak arms are heavy”.
But this generation begs to differ.
All we see is hot guys
And that girl who's ****.
We do dumb thing because its trendy.
These kids are crying out
"please don't make me"!
We have no respect.
Our minds are empty.
We are so disrespectful
Because we can be.
Look all i'm saying is that the world is changing.
It went from bad to worse the choice you make is effecting.
The life we live is slowly ending.
I hate to say it but even the news is screaming.
Trash in the ocean it's killing the living.
We all need to our part but the doesn't mean giving a kidney.
Do small things, don't leave the water running.
The small things matter to more than just me.
Do want you can to help us PLEASE im begging.

Why did my dad leave
i guess he doesn't need me
why dont you love me