I watch these documentaries
About East Of the Mississippi Legends
Like Popcorn Sutten and D Ray White
The sound of Hank III on lonesome guitar
Or perhaps the pleading pull of sad violin
A tear slips as I too remember
When I used to be Wild
Running barefoot through dew drenched grass
I want to breathe that air again
The air of the Wild
They live on through fan or family
Each has lit a fire
Some under copper stills
Others on the heals of mountain dancing shoes
Smoke continues to roll out from under those of us affected
Our eyes searching each rain for more of the same
Boone County is beautiful
Something  to write home about
All in one these  coal stripped mountains are a larger than life package
That will steal your very breath
Replacing it with back woods romance
Late night campfire stories
Not to mention the heady fragrance of Paw Paw perfume
I grew up nestled between the Appalachia
Lush valley of the Shenandoah
I thought I knew what mountains were

I was wrong.

Muscles once taunt now lie lax
A smile graces clear skin
Seeing through bright eyes once again
I've missed the feel of smoothness your memory evokes
Reigned in for longer than I would have preferred
Restricted with tear's choke
Clouds crowding me
My feet are beneath me
Soft pads pounding hot pavement
In midsummer celebration
Hearing your song from oceans away  
Eases the hold of emotional strangulation
I miss you.
Deep aches that know not the pressure of your touch
Even so they call for you
Missing you without measuring how much

When I was much younger
Salamander for skin with aching veins of Pele
I always knew that I was better for the burning
Then ever I was for fading away
Making promises to innocence I would not hold on to much longer
Merely echos reminding me of what can never be
Resonating through the hollowed hallways residing deep within me

I was held close on foggy mornings
Clouds rolling in to the tune of distant thunder
A tangled mess of gray sheets
Goodbye on the edges of our teeth
Looking back now through clearer lenses I know you better than I should
Lessons and years of laughter lie between us
Still, I slumber while watching traffic in my sleep

I often sit and wonder
Amongst the blurred water colors of twilight
What you would have to say about today
Commenting softly on the morning bird song
Humming against the back of my neck in sleepy adoration
Sometimes I cry with longing, with regret
At all we will never share
Most often I smile that secret you and me smile
At all we were able to lay bare
The weight of your hand in mine has no measure
I recognize it in the deep hours of night
I'll hear your voice, taste your taste
Notice your presence in bright summer light
We lived drunk, so high our eyes crossed
Soaking up every second we had to grab
Nothing that strong lasts for long
I'm blessed to have loved you
Blessed to love you still

Rough edges shape their calluses to my own
We bite softly at first
Tasting shadowed limitations
Deeper flavors blossom wet and dark along thirsty tongues
I need closer
To render you tearful, speechless
Peel back each layer then climb inside
Saturating my parched surface
With the dewy fabric of your subconscious mind
Ebony pupils widen into the spalunking expanse of my own
I could explore your depths for a lifetime
I would still be left wanting

Deep sighs at day break*
Our heated surface no match for the inferno inside
Raging for the ache of your dark touch
Sweat slicks already lubricated flesh
I curve into the muscled wall of your chest
Closer
I need it
I need you
Appalachia shadows criss cross fogged windows
Penetrating stories written along their dewed edges
I writhe beneath your whispers of
"Come for me"
Body bowed, tight like violin strings
Played by expert, elegant fingers
Shudder. Surrender
The seat of my soul flooding with pleasure, with release
Request granted

At least it was springtime
I whisper to myself as he eases into the unknown
Such a strong man, a quiet man
My grandfather no longer suffering
Another gentle soul these hands have helped
Continue on this journey of "being"
No longer human
Scattered amongst the in between
You are loved
You will be missed
Rest in Peace

Rose petals like love letters crinkle around well loved edges
The sweet scent of their memory still saturates my senses
I miss you more than I could ever articulate
Each nerve ending longs for just a whisper, a touch
Occasionally I stumble across old recordings of your beautiful voice
Now only in dreams do I witness
Soft movements, tender touches
Waking with aches and pains that only you could ease
A well painted visage fits perfectly over the sadness
Aglow with sunlight and smile veneer seals solid with coarse tears
I keep hidden what I cannot hide