Feeling strange and alone. Scared of my future. will I ever know? Will I die or survive? Will I keep fighting with myself. Will the sun always shine or would I be just another regret. If I looked in my past could I see something that would have last..
Did I go to fast ?.. Can we slow it down? and take a breath and look at it all now. Feels like we’re all bound and we can’t be found….

I’m shaking and I’m breaking. I’m crying and I’m lying am I dying? The stress keeps building and it all adds up, but for what no one has any luck.. so I’m just giving up.. The cuts have gone to deep I guess it’s time for me to take that leap..

Did I go to fast? Can we slow it down? And take a breath and look at it all now.. The blood Is falling to the floor.. I’m sorry I couldn’t fight this anymore.

Why can’t life be easy
Why do we wake up every day stuck in the same place as yesterday..
Why do I feel the pain in my heart. This agonizing pain that seems like it will always remain..
Why would this Leave  me with haunted thoughts and broken dreams making me face my own reality.

It’s a cold dark Saturday night.. She’s been up since four am thinking outside in the weather wishing she could do better and when she opens up the door she sees bottles on the floor.. There’s no where to hide. She can’t do this no more.. so tired of the pain and you winning this game…. I can’t sacrifice anymore. If only there were still some good in the world.. can skies of grey just fade away. Is it to late for me to win this war.. when the darkness grows. The weak will fall.. There’s no one to help at all.

Think about the day we first met. Think about the day were everything made sense. People say nothing lasts forever and there are no happy ever afters, but when we’re together you turn my lyrics into rhymes and I feel just fine.. if only I thought about it how you make me wanna shine..together we’re like stars sparkling in the sky. Together the world spends out of control. You complete my wish you make me whole. Without you all the volcanoes would explode. Cupid wouldn’t fly or shoot arrows with a bow. I know I’m not perfect but I’ll spend my whole life showing you I’m worth it.. I wanna think about you every second every minute every hour of the day just so the memories of you never fade away.

I’m sorry I’m broke.. I’m sorry I’m bruised.. I’m sorry I messed up our friendship that was so new.... I’m sorry to be untrue and hide things from you.. I promise I was not trying to cause this fight with you.. I wish I knew something I could do....I know you say what’s done is done, but hopefully one day I’ll get the chance to be there with you.... I swear, I wish I never lied to you and this time it is true.. I’m sorry I’m not perfect, and you didn’t deserve it.... I’m sorry I’ve been such a bad friend to you.. I’m not going to pretend that things will ever be the same again.. here lies you’re dear friend. I just hope you understand that this wasn’t planed. I’m sorry you know of this stuff firsthand.... Please don’t be worried please don’t be sad. There is Nothing happening That is quite so bad. I just keep imagining something so challenging and trying to find the strength to just stop balancing.... I’m sorry.. The end.

Time is fast and can go by so slow. There’s never enough time to enjoy life but seems like forever to heal, and grow….. Why is time so cruel?  just giving me the chance to fall in love with you. Just so it hurts more once I loose you.

I’m left with memories and laughs and soon time will pass and remove those from me. time is cruel time is fast nothing ever will last.

Why do I think of you every day feeling so distracted and always in your way. Why does this not feel the same as it did the other day..I feel abandon and like you pushed me  away. You left me wondering and stranded in my thoughts….was this just your game? Is this when you shift your  blame? before you answer that question imagine me sitting in the dark and tears falling down my face. While I’m over thinking everything that was.. Every word….Every laugh…. Every smile…. Every hug….Every memory and thought that was.. It can’t be true because none of that was never really you.. please just tell me what happened what did I do…. I would just need a clue..  Please answer you’re phone and don’t leave me alone.. I guess i’m just getting your dial tone…. This will remain forever  unknown, but I love you..

You may see me as someone from heaven, but lives in hell.... you may see me as a very shy scared person who is always so uncertain and maybe a little broken. while all of this is true it seems I have fallen in love with you.... There are so many thoughts. To where  I’m still trying to connect the dots..  you’re voice is so enchanting it’s very soft and  oh so kind. I close my eyes and look up to the skies and wonder why you put on this disguise.... I want you to know that I will be here and will not say goodbye.... I know every night you rest you’re head that a  small part of you dies.... You battle so much with the memories that are unjust.. I can see you now as a soldier rising up from the dust.... I want you to know that with the both of us you don’t have to fight so much.. Just let me be your crutch if that’s not asking of so much..  I give you my heart....My soul....My love, and my trust.... If this would make you close enough to revile yourself to me.. Just take off you’re armor and you can see just how much you really mean to me....

Love hurts.. love hurts so bad it makes you want to cliff dive into water slowly sinking to the bottom. It takes your breath away and can crush your soul feels like into millions of pieces. It starts off with fire,  sparks and romance you always give your all into someone hoping not to fall face first.
    Just hoping that someone would be there to hold you,.. support you,.. comfort you. We open our hearts up for a stranger letting them see into our life. For it only to hurt us leaving tears in the bathroom floor or going down the shower drain. Leaving us with empty hopes and dreams making beautiful souls cry and screaming  
Love hurts and love does ****.