This winter, the clouds followed me
I knew no more who I wanted to be

But I knew that it was either sparrows or the humming birds'
Or paper planes carved out of obituaries flying in the sky;

Mother, I want to fly.

My lovely ten,
It was a summers evening
The boys were out playing;

If only I knew
If only I knew

My teacher said I would do great things,
He would call me his pretty boy,
A notary twig
He would hush my toes,

I wanted to scream,
But the beautiful boy said he could play no more.

Your soul matches the colour of the perfume that my mother wore,
I now know how it feels to be dead, it is just wind kissing your face and you are stuck on a lonely boat,
I thought I would meet you but your body lies cold
In my memory, you're still blushing and your red tshirt is pretty bold
I guess I take my journey alone as I came empty
I heard your sound in the trees above
And to me that was plenty;
My time on Earth is now a memory and a foam of milky stars,
You might not be here with me,
But I know that you ain't far.

I think of meadows Anna,
We are in a time loop,
It has been the meteor
And we put in on pause;
Anna, I don't think the world is ending anymore,
I am happy with aeroplanes and magnets falling off the fridge and Kim Jong Un marching to Mars to punish a new colony,
I will no longer read papers or wait for approval,
Just for 3 minutes, you are mine Anna,
I will smile, as the grass burns along us,
We are married in death.

Say, what wouldn't I do?
Would I paint the sky gray?
Only if the sun would set
After an eternity,
I would rest my decades in your rarity,
Nay, I say,
I would travel my minds pasty lanes
Where the waves crash in an empty island
I would sink in your skin,
Close my eyes to begin
The taste of your silence;
Remind me to talk about the world and it's problems
When the sun covers it's last ray;

My love, I would marry your soul
And make it my own,
If I could have you for a day.

You aren't him,
But you are you.

When I'm gone,
I'll pray for this compromise;
I'll pray that I get to live again,
In the heartbreak hotel,
And promise myself lies;

I love you for you,
This poetry does not belittle
I chose you,
I did not settle.

You may think that I am not enough,
but look around you,
Is anything enough?
Is it a deaf man's problem if he cannot hear your pain?

I'll pick up myself again, and paint your image blue,
I will pursue other forms of torments
And if it makes you happy,
I'll fall in love with you again
And cry about not being enough until you smile

Can it be clearer than a day that I write to me
And complain about trivial things
Like how it used to be?

Death is trivial, I can cry about death,
But I cannot cry enough about possibilities,
I wish it had been a hassle or a disaster,
But it was beautiful

By god, I say, how can I replace you?

Didn't I try enough?
Didn't I?