You're a dream
A bittersweet dream
Soon to be demolished by Reality

I just want to blow my brain out
Or my throat, or even my **** heart
I get a sense of adrenaline when I think of that
And it feels devastatingly great

I'm in chains and shackles
And I'm on death row
I won't escape your judgment
I don't fear death but I'm terrified of losing you
Now I'm lying face down and blindfolded on a guillotine  
Will you behead me and my dreams and future?
Or will you let me live on and flourish in your love?

My body's warmth has been ****** up
I'm left with nothing but emptiness and sadness
My eyes are moist and need to leak
But not here in this room full of judgemental eyes
I wish I could just run out and cry my fears out
Every thought in my head stabs my heart
I can't stop but press on until I'm bleeding
No one will ever hear my quiet sobs nor care
I'll just sit here in this lonely corner
And let my eyes release my pain

Put me down like a dog
That's just meant to suffer
For the rest of its short-lived life

Run away like your dear life depends on it
Just crush me already and scar my heart
I don't know what I did wrong
But I've been accused
Just let me go
Into the past

I know you know
But please let me have what I need
He is the only one that keeps me sane and fulfilled
He gives me warmth and comfort
He is like my sun and moon
Both are things that I can't live without
He's true, honest and loyal
I already know that you disapprove but please
Let me have him because he is all I need
I have morals and principles
And I understand it all
But just let me have him
Because then I'd be happy for once

I won't fight you
If you want to take a U-turn
I'll just let the rain pelt down
Freezing me until it burns
Everything moves on and maybe you will too
I'll just disappear into the past

I tried to stay strong and whole
But I can't help but break down
I've been overwhelmed with emotions
I want to stay calm but I'm about to explode
I just want my neck to be severed
As my body is wrapped in barbed wires
Pain is the only thing on my mind
And I want it like I need it

I just want to run from here
It used to be so sunny and warm
But gray clouds are rolling in as it starts to storm
This was my only safe place to be but now it's messed up

You opened up the black box
To which I was trapped in
I escaped that prison which was loneliness

We were distant but now are so close
I'd be scared to let you go
My affection for you grew as big as the sea

With you, I feel whole and healed
As if I was never even broken before
You made me feel the things I've never felt before

I was saved by you from my terrible end

I'm drifting off again
I feel so tired of everything
Everything except you
I feel you in my dreams
You're never out of my head
You nourish me so well and our flame keeps growing
I'm feeling so drowsy and weak
All I want is to vibe with you
Hold you, hug you, and kiss you in the still silence
I want you to suffocate in my love
Let's just hold on to each other
While we dream

You ask why I look unhappy
But I'll never tell you the **** truth
Because you make me suffer
I get treated like a slave

Always forced to work while no reward
Not even a "thank you" but that'll never be good enough
I smile around you so you won't bother me anymore
You always punish me whenever I get down
But I can't control weather I'm sad or not

I feel so loveless and powerless
All I want is peace and love from the one I can trust
It's so pathetic that my own parents can't even love me right
All they do is yell at me and never try to understand me or listen
They've cornered me on the edge of a cliff but they cant see that
The wind is so harsh and frigid that it only temps me more to die
I'm so tired of this suffering that maybe I should just jump
Just remember that peace and love was all I ever wanted
But maybe it's too much to be asked for

I would love to tear you apart
But something suppresses that feeling
I'm a sadist but I'm a broken soul too
I wanna give you a chance
But I don't know what you're doing
With those words sputtering out your mouth
I'm cold-blooded and I could care less about love
But you were an exception
You were something special and beautiful
So different but similar like the rest
Now you're a mess
And I don't know who you are anymore

I've been so patient with you
But I can't take your mentality anymore
I'm feeling nothing at all now
Not even your love at this moment
I feel like I should just **** you
I sparred you the last time
And I don't want to be nice

I'm so thin and hollow
That I can barely breath
Because the air passes right through me

I wanna spill my ****** guts on the table
For you to know what's on my mind
I don't even know what happened

All I know is that I'm a little more free
But more sad, lonely, and cold
I hate my regrets

Who will comfort me now?
He'll come at midnight
Whispering temptations in my ears
and flirting with me

Who will accept me?
He'll take anybody
Of any gender, race, and age

Who will be there with me always?
He'll stalk me every second I breath
Hoping for me to open up to him

Death will gladly take me
As I'll take him

You are the only thing that really matters
I stay alive just for you even in my terrible life
You give me so much and more that I could've asked for
Love, genuinity, loyalty, devotion, care and oh I could I go on and on
You are my purpose now and I hope that it stays like that forever
All I need is You and your love in my life
I hope this journey never ends