They show up in the most inconvenient of times.
They bring smiles, but they also bring tears.
So many smiles, so many tears.
I see you now. Jokes are made.
Some playful and innocent.
Most like a knife through my heart.
I do not know when we became this.
I do not know how we went from what we were to what we are.
Poetry and long nights, perfume and smiles.
Now it just hurts. For you, for me.
Wanting to try to keep what little we have left.
Building up those walls that crumbled between us before.
The past is in the past. We cannot rewrite history.
We never had the chance to be just friends.
I suppose that is why we cannot see what that would be.
I miss the way I could let you see the dark side of me.
The dark side that no other human could ever or would ever see.
I do not wish to recreate the mess that we so often fell into.
I do not wish to wreck what little goodness we still have.
I still love you, I always will.
We will always have the memories that ******* us so.
Someday we may heal, someday we may smile.
Smile without the hurt, without the tears.

Her little fingers gripping mine.
Her cry like little whispers to my heart.
Those blue eyes staring up at me.
She is my sunshine, my only sunshine.
My beautiful rose.
If only in a dream, I know that she is mine.
She is my sunshine, my only sunshine.

Alone
Heart still beating
Tears still falling    
I see it sitting there
Like an old friend
Just one more time
No one will notice
Another scar
It will fade
Stupid to believe
Silly to hope
Never quite enough
Not for him, not for you
Not even for me
So, why not just once more?

I never dreamed that my heart could be torn into three equal pieces...

each leading down a path that does not appear to be mine to take.

 What's next? Wait for the next opportunity to love that which is not mine to love?

Hope that maybe one of those paths may actually be mine to take?

No.

Silence.

That is all that I hear now.

I see mouths moving.

If I hear sound at all it is just mindless muttering, whispers in the air.

I feel cold. Unprotected and left bare.

What is left for me to give whoever may be next?

When did I become this woman that I used to hate?

Is it only a matter of time? Will I give in to that which tempts me so?

I do not know and truthfully, I do not care.

A look, that is all it takes

Every single time you look at me

My heart wants to just fly away with the butterflies

You make me smile

You make me laugh

Every kiss leaves me longing for even just one more

One of you a best friend

The other a complete wild card

Both leave me speechless and unable to shut up

Unable to think

Unable to breathe

Probably because you cannot seem to stop tickling me

Both so godly

Both so handsome

I may end up with one or I may end up with none

One thing I know

Without a doubt, this...

Is the hardest choice I will never have to make