you remind me of

a shadow eternity. remember how we
sat in emergency. glass linoleum and plastic and surgery
rat in a cage escaping wordlessly. see: cat in a burglary
house of mirror manifold she matches me perfectly
satin curtain collective passé theatrical major
playing savior, overacting both as master and maker
your odds are infinitesimal die cast into favor
Snake eyes roll like my saliva gave the apple its flavor
our catch-you-later never manifested, painfully true
Graceland cemetery afternoon parading our youth
Zombie on repeat red cups of ***** and juice
stepping stones like dead roses on anonymous tombs
stop me if i'm stopping too soon. lost in your music
strumming loosely on guitar strings to soften the grooves
mountainside Montana rainstorm, clover and wheat
frozen peaks, molten beneath. we die so vultures can eat
open deeply, soul discrete. woven woefully neatly
we're strangers with our lovers from the moment we meet
throat bleeding, choke/breath please queen cobra release
taste that venom sink slowly float to total reprieve
under the knife, over the needle. call me Mopey Knievel
stunts include both waking up and going to sleep
eau de repeat. doomed to resurface, funeral dirt
rebelling intently against immediate purpose
albatross across me like a soldier of fortune
amassing omens hoping for the locusts to swarm
smoking by porchlight oil-painting a portrait
reminisce compulsively until we're reborn
manifold origami we are egoic reform
i'm sorry nobody warned you
but here we are

i used to ride my father's shoulders
hands clasped, i was a giant
gazed in astonished silence
at the world from such a height.
safe and sound and warm and fresh
made them proud with every breath
drawn deep to sing along with tape cassettes.
the smell of cigarettes inside my overalls and blankets
my mother's favorite apron had a pocket stitched in front
where she planted both her hands
when she was growing impatient.
waiting for him. so was i. headlights rolling at 10
meant he was home again. his Jeep wrangler was red
rusted and gorgeous. exhaust fuming our fortress
shotgun en route to school to feel important
seatbelt around my torso. the day
i climbed upon his shoulders and my balance had waned
my feet hung down much closer to his waist
i felt his chest beating, breathing harshly. sweat
droplets, graying scalp. i could have wept
but only climbed off and walked myself to the store
knowing that i couldn't be a giant anymore.