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Quadree Singer May 2019
There’s a reason why I punch walls when I’m upset. I think of a wall an impenetrable object; tall, sturdy, and great for keeping things out or holding me back. When my frustrations get the best of me, I put up a wall in my mind. This mental wall keeps me from reaching out to say I need help, it deters people from comforting me or holding me close. That mental wall quickly becomes tangible and all I want to do is tear it down, brick by brick. But, as expected, the wall is impenetrable. Mocking and taunting as I lay my bare knuckles to its cold hard surface. The wall stays standing and I am left hurting, trapped by my own image of a prison.
I don’t struggle with self harm, but I do struggle with self-discomfort. I often question myself wondering why I do the things that I do which often pushes the people closes to me away.
Quadree Singer May 2019
We don’t have time for each other anymore.
I use to give you my time and you would give me yours.

We would trade time back and forth like they were baseball cards.
But now,
We only search for time.
Hoping to get a glimpse of time when it passes.
Praying that time will allow us to live in its moments.

We don’t spend time together anymore.
Ha!
As of time were currency.
Because if time were money it would be more valued than gold, but instead of being stingy with our time We would go broke.

Instead of locking time in a safe
We would use it to pay for movie dates
or hanging out on the couch while We hold each other close.

Because spending time means more than wasting it.

You see time waits for no one and We often don’t care enough to try to chase it.
But I’m sure if time were actually as useful as money
We would take it.
We would plant its seeds.
We would make sure that it grows big and healthy like a redwood tree.
Protect it like a mother protects her own child in her womb.
Never letting time out of our site.
Because time just became valuable.

We don’t have time.
Because We don’t spend time.
Because time does not wait.

— The End —