Pretty girl

Pretty girl May 2018

Say

I live in a state where the girls are not gay but the culture is
Where my boy only tells you he loves you when it's convenient
When your i love you's are only true if they come with the gift of your body

I live someplace where the women do not bloom often
The girls have guilty minds from putting dainty things on display while men find joy in plucking them but we do not tell dad
That nice man is giving girl attention
She asks her self if this is love

Little girls are too little and too big too
They tell you let your mind grow but dont let your bodies move
Girls who are tight with mature minds are for men who lack depth
Who have bottle caps for heads cause there's no water room

Shave your ***** cause he wants you too
Plus your legs cause he wants those smooth
Say "please" and "thank you" Pretty girls gotta be polite
Say "I'm sorry." cause existing upsets the balance of their breathing

If you woulda been sweeter you coulda saved yourslef another breakdown
"But i love him." say
"Im sorry
Sorry.
Sorry!
sorry..."

I appologize.

Pretty girl May 2018

Pressed flower petals

I've become accustomed to sending her letters of I love you and pressed flower petals between pages I call ribs
My powdered heart is so fine you'd think i wouldn't be able to find the bits

She brought her delicate finger tips to press against it
I told her of a treasure i had found on my bedroom floor trying lure my skeleton from it's sacred slumber

She said she needed a knight on her quest to free her princess bones so I said yes
We battled sleep demons with pillow underbellies to tell eachother our calorie counts

I promise we're not sick just as lovely as it gets

-A friend

Pretty girl May 2018

She called them Snowflakes

Do you know how many birthday wishes i wasted on mermaid tails and doll skin?
I wanted to be as white as ariel in the arms of a boy who loved a girl without a voice
My cousin calls them snowflakes but she is just as prissy as the flowers who didn't love her as much as she loved their skin...
I wanted to waste away my melanin
I wanted to blend
I've lost count the tears I used to water my dreams of dusty rose cheeks and freckels
I am-
Im not sure of what i am.
But i think she is meant to be as she is
Let's let her grow a while longer

A differnt plant entirely. Naturally. Lovely.

Pretty girl Apr 2018

Relapse

I can feel my collar bones though my stomach grows?
Weird how i always hear it groan.
I feed her calories yet it's not enough.
Most times I feed her nothing but ana says it's still too much.
So i walk stairs at night cause she never lets me sleep.
If i chew my nails the stubs I'll have to keep.
I can't sleep at night i tell you I think i might decay.
Im decaying is what they say.
I can't count in maths but my intakes to the decimal.
Silly me thinking i should let myself feel full.
How come im only pretty when im dying?

I haven't written anything real for a few months but this came to me tonight.

Pretty girl Mar 2018

Eating is not an activity

The hot coffee told my bones they weren't growing and you know how words are like pop songs
Or maybe it's the other way around because pop songs are just words...

Im singing meaningless lyrics to notebooks
Im a fool
They tell me if im too picky my fingers will fall off so now im indecisive

I told them I can't eat that
im a **** good liar because once id lost my taste buds on a count of hot coffee

I can't eat THAT

Well then why is my stomach full?
As well as marrow whole

This is a dumb draft because i forget the better poem i kept in my head. This is what i came up with using some lines i could remeber. I gotta remind myself to write things down sooner.

Pretty girl Sep 2017

Uh-naturally pink cheeks

I didn't think you'd ever want me
In fact i dont believe you ever will
You deserve girls who are pretty and petite
Ones that you never see eat or drink
I am entirely too real
My tummy isn't flat
My taste in music is specific

I make you cringe into yourself
But this is just an assumption
You don't like me
And i can't be myself
So you see i don't think you ever will
You cant if im invisible
You cant if im not real

Pretty girl Sep 2017

Teeth and tongue

I stopped speaking when i realized it didn't matter what i had to say

It won't change the world anyway

It was mindless chitchat

I filled in the blanks

But they looked confused
So silent

I stay