The sun rises over the horizon,
It's early morning.
I look over the clouds,
I feel my body missing.
Suddenly it falls down,
Into the black abbeys of nothingness.

It does seem inviting,
Warmth, comfort,
Never wanting to leave.
All alone,
Turned off phone,
Nobody can reach me.

I fell down too hard, with nobody to support me,
Or did I just choose not to grab those reached out hands in front of me?

I guess this was it,
The last drop,
My breaking line.
Not even looking at those hands,
Not even when they survive.
It's hard for them too,
Being down here.
But sadly this is my reality
I hope you enjoyed your stay.

One day i got recommendations,
I should read some of my creations.
Friendly woman with the heart of gold,
Passed me the confidence,
The will to make me grow.
People surrounded me and everyone was happy,
Although the underlying reason for the things happening
Started boiling.
I started falling,
Losing myself.
Never ending, always on the road.
Pretty mama, where'd you go?
This is a blank canvas.
Just show, don't tell.
That all the scars you put on yourself,
They are all just theft.
Of feeling, of emotion, of living and of life as the one who's always
The last left.

Dark mind,
Lost thoughts, don't hide
Believe in yourself, little girl
In the shadows you lurk, you're left behind
Never wanting to change
Too scared to accept the fate,
That you'll always be alone.
Embrace it,
Question it.
Are you heaven or hell?
The hellish taste but the sweet heavenly sensation drags me under.

Here I stay,
Waiting for the rain
Embracing the pain,
Not being able to get up
The thoughts in my mind
They feel like the heaviest chains
They fill me up
Drag me down
Scream at me,
Don't let me escape
When I don't obey them.
I have to leave,
Leave my body
Leave my mind
Just let me rest
Maybe in peace.

The power is out again.
"Calmly exit the building"
Repeated the same old voice.
This has been happening often,
These days the power just shuts down.
The rocks, with which the kids broke the windows with
Were enough to trigger the outage.
As calmly as the electricity dissapeared, the fire started.
I proceed to walk out of the abandoned and scarred building,
Looking back at it, I wonder,
Why does the renovated place always end up being the first to burn?
We have tried rebuilding it countless times,
With and without help.
I shiver as I see a huge chunk fall off.
Looking around,
The streets are empty, nobody is here.
I'm the only one standing with the helpless building.
I guess I won't get any help in rebuilding it again.

You're lost
You can't find yourself
Yet I know exactly where you are
In my mind, you reside.
Man-made distance
Rips us apart.
What will you decide?
To cover yourself and hide?
Or will you blossom?
Like a fragile flower,
A little need for sunshine
Not a huge problem.
I can find you.
I can heal you.
Let yourself go darling,
Fall into my hands
I'll help you regain control.
But,
You're lost
You can't find yourself.
I know where you are,
In my mind, you reside.
Maybe even until the end of time.