I feel cold,
I can't see what I am doing,
I am losing energy,
I feel pain inside,
I can't control my emotions,
I can't help that I am losing control.

~~~
No one sees the pain,
No one who I really am,
Everyone that I hold dearly,
They see me in a different personality,
Online, I am a different,
The real me is what I am from the inside,
Not the outside,
Sometimes that not everything about me,
I might never know what I really am,
When I feel darkness inside of me,
That give me pain....
~~~

~~~
I feel nothing,
I feel sad,
I feel empty in my life,
Alone that I am still mostly,
It's pain inside of me,
I am tired of feeling like this,
How can I get through this,
When I am alone mostly,
I am tired of everything,
Mentally and physically,
I don't know how long I will last,
I am wishes everyday that I have
Someone with me 24/7,
Mentally for me is that I am hurt all the time,
Physically is that I feel like a burden to everyone,
I just feel nothing....
~~~

~~~

My mind feels confused,
I feel so lost that I just feel trapped,
I can't see anything but darkness
It hurts so much,
I don't see how people get out of it,
But I can't get out of my own madness,
Feels like more than madness,
It feels like hell.
-S.M 2019

~~~

~~~
I am so tired of everything,
I been suffering,
I been crushed,
I been defeated,
I been feeling weak,
My emotions are weak,
My life is a wreak,
I feel like no one understands,
My heart's been broken,
My mind is lost and confused,
I feel like that I can't take it anymore,
I need someone just to comfort me,
I don't get them often,
I feel like that I am in a cage,
And I can get out,
I don't know where I am at,
It dark and scary,
I can't see anything,
My tears that I can't control,
It hurts,
It hurts so much,
I just want the pain to go away,
I can't stop the pain,
I can't stop thinking about it,
Because it hurts so much,
My nightmares continues to haunts me,
I want it to stop,
Make it stop,
I can't breathe,
I am trying to get out of it,
But it makes it worse,
I try to ask for help,
I hear people in my mind,
Like they are saying,
'I am busy, I am working now.'
'Can't you see that I am talking to someone else?!?!'
'You are a waste of space, leave me alone!!!'
'You just want attention don't you!?'
'You deserve this! Cause you hurt me, you wasted my life!'
'You don't deserve to have friends. I made you this way so just die!!!'
So that is what I am hearing in my head,
My nightmares still haunts me,
I just want it to stop,
It hard to speak louder to let people know that I am a problem,
I feel like that,
No one sees my silences,
I feel now is that I'm a problem,
Because I am a burden...
~~~