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OnLithium Apr 1
I'd love to meet you halfway,
I just don't think today is the day,
Wrap yourself around me,
Let whatever this is be.

Reflections of souls beneath the moon's glare,  
A cruel embrace leaves scars I must bear,
The fire of my past now a flickering flame,  
Faded photographs whispering names I don't claim.  

Crimson skies bleed with my forgotten cries,  
The weight of the past like a shroud that denies,
Chained to the moments that scream in vain,  
Like a tornado in my heart, driving me insane.

As the hourglass shatters, and time slips away,  
I embrace the blame, a small price to pay,  
In a labyrinth of memories, I search for the light,  
But every step forward pulls me farther into the night.  

In the mistakes of yesterday, where the sunlight fades,  
Disbelief in my veins and loathing that invades,
Acceptance deep in my soul,  
Hate entangles, a noose on a pole.

In the silence of dawn, I find peace in decay,  
As I stand on the edge, I'm letting the shadows stay,
I am the echo that I want to erase,
In my heavy heart may I find my place.
OnLithium Apr 1
Haven't been myself
But who am I kidding
I don't even know who I am
I want you to stay
Want you to leave
I'm hoping I'm forever
And hoping you realize I'm not it
You call it sabotage
I call it suicide
Is it honesty do you think?
Depression or regression
Either way I don't like this
Don't pick me up
You wouldn't understand
Please I just want to bleed
Don't let me drown
Please I just want to breathe
You know this need
I know I'm ****** up
Won't even deny it
Do what you have to
Say what you want
I can't believe it nor want to
I love you coming off your lip
Fifty fifty but please
No coin flip
OnLithium Mar 3
I misprise who is't I am
I misprise who is't I am not
I seeketh changeth
I don't seeth how it's probable
Viewing as I'm the same p'rson

I am who is't I am I supposeth
I am the tears yond I caused
To hie down thy visage
I am the blood yond I've spilled
Through callous action
I am the weight of mine own sins
And I knoweth
I am running out of tears myself
I am running out of blood to keepeth Pouring into lifeless conditions
And I'm getting awfully heavy

Forgetting what once wast
And hating what forsooth is
I prayeth I am not the villian
But if I am to beest
I'll rememb'r the chapters yond
Madeth me
OnLithium Mar 3
I'm back to the time
Of writing myself letters
Bargaining with myself
Reasoning with myself

Reminding me of all the things
I am
And all of the things I am not

My biggest critic has always been me
I just know I can't live in make believe

Just wishing I could see someone else.
OnLithium Jan 20
I have reached the bottom of my soul
And seen the peak of my ability

The wasteland of trauma
Aided by my vices
Has led me to fear what is inside

I have climbed on broken glass
And seen the blood dripping
Only to not have moved an inch
And to have only hurt myself

I now have the wisdom
"Why am I climbing on broken glass?"
"This cannot be the only path."
I have turned around
Maybe I'll find flowery meadows
OnLithium Nov 2024
I have thought about being something
Other than myself

To be the smoke from an exhale
Of a shortening cigarette
Fading into the air.

To be a brown leaf
Of a dying tree
Falling to the ground.

To be the the bubbles
Of a powerful ocean wave
Incorporating back to the mass.

To be free of this mortal shell
Of despair and agony and turmoil
Drifting through the world.
OnLithium Nov 2024
T&T
Day in & day out.
My will to continue.
Crests and falls.
Whispers & exclamations.
Trials & tribulations.
Scorn & exaltation.
Enconium & condemnation.

Yet, here I am.

I crave love
Yet I desire distance.

I need somebody.
Yet I hate everybody.

I want to swim.
Yet I let myself drown.
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