The rain is pleasantly depressing. I think I’m starting to realize that agony is what makes me feel alive. Unfortunately...

I’m a love addict & I want to be intoxicated on love & liquor with you.
But I can’t. I have to change.
Even though all I want to do is escape this chaotic world & fall deep into your warm, loving arms.
We can run away together & chase adventure after adventure.
Until our spark dies out.
Then we can die together, away from the chaos we were trying to escape from the beginning.
Oh, we escaped it alright.

My heart feels dim & my chest heavy. You’re right about me. I need to learn how to love myself. But what is there to love? Physical beauty fades & only soul remains. How beautiful is my soul? My soul feels dead & I need to revive it. I feel so empty inside. I feel like I’m nothing while the crazy world is spinning around me & I am not apart of it. At least I’m feeling something right?