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255 · Jan 2022
my life
Obscurexx Jan 2022
i hate it here
i hate the person I've become
i hate the person I've become
i hate the person I've become
Are you hearing me? i said i hate everything that's going on in my life
i feel trapped, unloved, unfocused, exhausted, worn out, and destroyed
i hate it here
i hate it here
i hate it here.
194 · Jan 2022
Obscure
Obscurexx Jan 2022
she tried her very best
yet nothing
she gave it all
yet destruction
her cries were never heard
her tears were never seen
yet she carried on
bruised busted and battered
she is a fighter
a fighter for her life
peace
joy
and
happiness
she fights
135 · Aug 2020
Headache
Obscurexx Aug 2020
I have this constant headache
The pain just won't go away
Waking up in the morning's
I can count on it to ruin my day

Ever got caught up in a routine
Then suddenly everything changed?
Sadly that's how the constant headache came in place

No doctor, no pill can take the pain away
Seems to me.. it came to stay!

But if anyone, anyone as the cure
Please don't stay away
It would be so helpful
Just to give my mind and heart a break
A break from the burden and pain it inflicted on me.
131 · May 2020
Shattered Heart
Obscurexx May 2020
I use to believe in fairytale
But this hurt hit me
My heart is shattered
I can't even gather the pieces
I doubt I can love again
Because that was my last shot
I thought it would struck the heart
But his layer was so hard
My bullet of love bounce back
Tearing through my skin until eventually damaging everything within

I am dead
There's no recovery
Do not resuscitate my heart
Leave it to die, honey,
It is tired and needs to be at rest
All that beating and bruising
There is truly no life to try one more time to give its best
The blood stopped pumping and eventually led to no blood circulating
My heart began to get very cold until it became frozen
No heat is able to melt the millions of pieces that was broken
I have loved too much but never got love in return
I have given up myself
Just to see if it would work
But every time I got burnt deeper and deeper until I bled out
No more red color left in me
Everybody has their time when enough is enough
I know now that it is my time because I am done now
It is over
No more red love
It is time to stay from a distance and do me
No more I love you
It is time to love me for me
Ain't nobody will get another opportunity with my heart
Everybody played their part
Now my heart is no more
No pain, no bruise, no soar
My heart being ice cold
Is definitely the cure
127 · Aug 2020
Karma
Obscurexx Aug 2020
I really do not understand
I truly don't
Firstly, You told me what was expected of me and I agreed
Not only to the spoken words
But to the fine print's
your flaws!

Did I not prove myself to be worth it?
Did I not give you all of me?
But yet... no mercy?
What kind of heartless person are you?
So **** undeserving!!
You just walk around and begin hurting
But be careful! Karma is a *****
And the ***** comes back around searching.!!
120 · Oct 2021
Lies
Obscurexx Oct 2021
When somebody doesn’t have your best interest at heart
They lie
When they don’t like you for who you are
They lie
They’ll do anything for anyone else and for you nothing so they lie
They lie because they somehow don’t wanna let you go
They lie because this is as real as it gets
They lie because deep down they know they can’t replace you
They lie
They lie
They lie, oh God ****** mon, they lie
100 · Sep 2020
JFG
Obscurexx Sep 2020
JFG
You didn't hurt me
I hurt me!
You didn't break me
I broke me!
I spent every  love penny
It's not your fault you couldn't handle me
it's neither your fault that I was too mature and womanly
boys play and men stay
that's just the reality
I am not upset just disappointed hunnae:)
96 · May 2020
Isolated
Obscurexx May 2020
Lately, lately I just don’t know what to do
I’m putting out all my efforts to show you
I swear at the beginning I had your attention
But now! I have no clue
No clue if you still want this
No clue if you’re just busy
No clue if you are just chilling
No clue, you feel me
But, I want to know if we are good
Or if something happened and change you
Babe no clue is truly not cool
I seriously need you!
I'm truly not good on my own
And that kills me

Lately, lately I feel so lost
I cannot find the way to my own heart
I feel like I’m just drifting in the wind
And every time I try to start again
I drift further away
No one there to help me pull myself together
Or tell me to stay
I don’t know me anymore
Simply, I’m obscure
My body
My mind
My soul
Just does not connect
I’m starting to think it’s the quarantine effect
Every ***** in my body is loose
And sadly there’s no glue
No glue to help put back the detached pieces
So I can try to fall back into place
But none
and this is why I’m done
See? I’m too broken
And this is on no one
Just the life that I’m living
And the stupid lyrics to my own song
92 · Sep 2020
Love
Obscurexx Sep 2020
He just won't allow me to feel him
He just won't come near me
He constantly disappears
then shows up glaring
I truly believe that he hates me
Have me contemplating on how to get him back
Instead, he gives me his favorite person, hurt
The one that cannot relate to happiness
Hurt surely shows no mercy
And love, He sits around dancing
Dancing on my grave
I swear each time I willfully cave
Thinking this time will be different
but its always a pill and potion
Something that leaves me overdosing
92 · Mar 2020
One Stand
Obscurexx Mar 2020
The moments we shared
Somehow I thought you cared
The way you held me, and the sweet sensational words you whisper
Got me all clueless of what’s next
Then!!!!
Right after, you got me all vex
You had me all memorized
But it was one of your ***** tricks
You fumble my heart
Oh yes, you did
You really tore it apart
Once I thought happy endings were real
But it’s only in stories it reveals
You heart-breaking brut
You shameless youth
Just to tell you what you're doing ain't cute
88 · Mar 2020
Why?
Obscurexx Mar 2020
Why do we allow other persons to have a say in our lives?
I agree no man is an island, But we do know what’s right
Why do we tend to succumb to the world?
I agree we live in it but we can be different from it
Why do we lack confidence in ourselves?
Why are we not elevated by family and friends?
Why do we always feel neglected and out of place?
Why am I always screaming and crying in vain?
Why can’t they love behind my flaws?
Why can’t they love me enough to free my thoughts?
Why am I so needy?
Why can they not see the hurt and the pain?
Why do sometimes we feel so a shame?
Am I that good at hiding by acting all sane?
Why, why can’t they treat me the same?
82 · Mar 2020
Grieve
Obscurexx Mar 2020
The day my brother died
Everyone cried including I
Mourning and crying
For days, weeks but not a year
Somehow I miss him
But he never really listen
Maybe he heard
But it never really stuck to his brain
Sometimes I wonder if he’s insane
Perhaps so, but we weren’t even that close
We fought and curse out each other
I never really cared
Couldn’t even bother
And to me, he didn’t even matter
Now am feeling every pain and
Every effect of his death
It even wounds me
Something I will never forget
Ta-ta rest in peace
Most things we had was incomplete
Farewell bro
They say life isn’t fair
Now am just realizing that I really cared
40 · Sep 21
Sewn to the Pain
Obscurexx Sep 21
I suffer in silence
No-one would understand
There’s so many people and things I cannot stand
Why am I always the problem
Am I just not the one
We go to war everyday
Guns blazing
I cannot escape this charade
Is this it?
Can I survive another day
Or Cover it up all and stay
The toxicity of it all is ******* with my head again
I ******* hate it here
But why can’t I leave
It’s like you sewed me down to a **** seat
I ******* hate it here
I want to leave
I’m tired of sowing my love
And not being able to reap
I ******* hate it here

— The End —