To love...
To love is to always be there for each other.
To love is to accept each other and say: "You are who you are and I'm happy with it."
To love is to be each other's sunlight in the darkness.
To love is to reach out to one another when they need it.
To love is to be able to look past tiny flaws.
To love is to love when you can say "I love you" truthfully.
A wise man once said: "In order to be able to truly love others, you must first be able to love yourself."
I keep waiting for the day that I can look a girl in the eyes and say "I love you", but to do that, I must first love this miserable pile of **** known as Davy.

There I was, a lonely, depressed, desperate, worthless young boy. Friendless, loveless...
I gave up all hope a long time ago, but then...I met this truly amazing girl and she made me realize that there are people who care about me, people that are there for me when I need it. After that, I met some more people, but I wanna say "Thank you so much for bringing me back my hope" to her.
Not just to her, but to everyone. You guys are truly amazing people, each and everyone of you!

My life used to be a cloudy place, but now, rays of sunlight burn through them, bringing back the light I missed for a long time

You, you are the sunshine of my dark days.
You, you are what keeps me warm on a cold winter's night.
You, you are the tissues that wipe away my tears.
You, you are the bandaids that stop the bleeding.
You, you are the sparkle I see during brief moments of happiness.
You, you are everything I need.

Unfortunately, you are just a dream...

This place by the river, this beautiful spot. I come here whenever it gets too much, too much to bear.
I just come here and stare, stare at nothing, just stare straight ahead.
I listen to the wind, brushing through the leaves, I listen to the motion of the water, I listen to people passing by.
Whenever I have no inspiration to write about my feelings, I come to this place, to let the thoughts get carried away by water and air.

I come to this beautiful place, this place, so beautiful and soothing, it's the poem that never has to be written.

I thought I knew you, yet I don't.
I thought I loved you, yet I feel nothing.
I thought you were always there for me, yet it feels like you're not.
I thought you were my father, yet you feel like a stranger.
You live in the same house as me, yet it feels like we're thousands of miles apart.
I thought I had a father, yet you only feel like the man who gave me life.

People always have a high expectation of me for some reason.
Those expectations always turn out to be too high, since I can never seem to live up to them.

This ****** up world is full of overly ambitious people, who only perfection, nothing less.

When will the day come that they realise perfection is a expectation too ambitious for any human being? Being perfect doesn't exist, you can say you gave it 100%, but that's never a full 100,000000%. It is and will always be 99,9999999%.

When will the day come that people lower their standards, and give every single person an equal chance to do right is this wrong place?

People, I'm stuck with this thought...
I'm thinking about leaving HP...
It's nice to have a place to be yourself, and it's nice to have a place where you can be honest, but it just feels like some people make fun of me, like they don't take me seriously...
I know not all of you do that, don't get me wrong...
This thought is just pulling me away from the one place I can be who I am, and I just hope people can and want to talk me out of it...

Why is it so hard?
Why is it so hard for guys to treat a girl like you treat others?
Why is it so hard for guys to stop looking for living Barbies and give every girl a fair chance?
Why is it so hard for guys to look a girl in the eyes instead of eying her looks?
Why is it so hard for guys to see a girl as a person instead of a talking *** doll?

Every girl is beautiful in her own way, and every girl is just as much of a human being as everyone else...

Funny how writing can have more meaning than speech.
Funny how a bit of ink on a paper can have more effect than words spoken out by yourself.
Funny how a pen is able to say every single word your mouth can't.
Funny how a bit of paper with some words can make people interested in you when people couldn't care less about you by words.
Funny how this world can become a different place by writing.
Funny...

I love this website, it's the well in which I can let my feelings fall to never see them again.
It's a place to share your feelings with others, maybe even to start friendships.
It's always been nice to see that someone started following you, that people show an interest in your work.
Same with following others, you show interest in what other people write.

But for some reason, I can't follow others anymore, I can't show my interest in other people's writings, and people can't or don't want to see my work, and it hurts...

Now, it feels like I'm starting all over again, from the time that I was just a lonely, miserable boy...

What should I do?
On one hand, writing soothes me, keeps me calm, it's a way of expressing my feelings, I enjoy it.
On the other hand, I feel like I'm making you guys bored, it feels like my writings have lost meaning, like it's just a bunch of words written down by a pathetic loser.

Please, what should I do?

Pain, anger, sadness...
Those are just some of the things I feel when we have yet another fight.
You...you always blame me for everything.
I thought you were special...
I've always hoped you would be different...
I've always hoped that you would look past my many, many flaws and take me for who I am....
Well, I was wrong...

Now, you're just another face in the crowd, nothing special...
I wish it would be different, but it seems fate decided to play one of his cruel games again...

Why do I still live?
Why am I still on this Earth if I don't have any talents or skills to fulfill any purpose?

Those are just some of the questions and thoughts that run through my mind every day.

Day in, day out, I think about myself, so basically I think about nothing.

Those thoughts fill up my mind, and it's only a matter of time before I explode.

I try to channel the thoughts into my pen, but it's getting harder to focus.

If only someone could defuse the bomb that's called Davy...

Your loved ones can sometimes hurt you more than 'strangers'.

WHY CAN'T I  DO ANYTHING RIGHT?
IS IT TOO MUCH TO JUST NOT HATE ME?
WHAT HAVE I DONE WRONG TO DESERVE THIS?

It was a beautiful, warm, sunny first day of July. Not a single cloud to be seen, not a drop of rain to be heard.
Everyone enjoyed this day, including me.

But then...

At work, it was me and 2 other people. From the moment I got there, I felt abandoned añd neglected. I felt like I was one of the products, not like an employee.

Ever since 12pm, the start of my work day, my  good mood got swept off it's feet by a well placed swing of neglection, abandonment and despair.

"Davy, you're so friendly, you do a good job." All lies...

Truth, honesty: 2 things everyone can offer, but not a chance in hell that someone will be truthfully honest to me...

The dream world, a beautiful place where everything is possible and anything can happen. Every night a random dream makes the trip from the dream world to my mind, and every day, I hope and hope that one of those good dreams will come true and bring a nice change in this cold, everyday place...

Where are you?
I need you...
I need you to embrace me...
I need you to wipe away my tears...
I need you to accept me...
I need you to just be there for me...
Forget those other things, just be there for me, I beg you, cause no matter how hard I've tried, this a war that cannot be fought on my own.

I hate you...
Three little words...
Three little words, holding enough power to destroy a human being...
Three little words I've heard many times in my life...
The sad thing is, the reasons why people don't like me all seem to be true...

Is it really too much to ask for three  little words that can mend a already devastated heart?

An empty room, no chairs, no light, no whatever.
An empty room, except for 2 people.
2 people, complete strangers to each other.
2 people in an empty room, saying nothing, just listening to the alternating sounds of breathing, with an occassional cough and sigh.
2 people, saying nothing, only breathing.
Breathing, which after a few minutes formed a perfect alternation.
2 people, walking around in a perfect circle, without them knowing.

They picked up each other's "actions", without knowing the other or having seen the other.
Just 2 people, complete strangers, walking in a circle towards each other.

Soon, their worlds will collide and become 1.

It was the 16th of October 2014, I was at a friend's house, well, guy I know from school, and we were drinking. It was around that day that negativity came to the doorstep and rang the doorbel and me foolish enough to open the door. We were drinking, I drank some more, we were laughing, and then.....

Total blackout....

I woke up in the hospital the next morning and I got word that I was a lucky guy.... if the ambulance came a minute later....let's say I wouldn't be here sharing my writings with you....

I was never a believer, but since that day I'm convinced that someone gave me a second chance.....

Why?
Why is it so hard?
Why is it so hard for people to just look at others without judgment?
Why is it so hard for those people to just respect others, no matter what race, religion, *** or whatever?

I'm glad I'm not part of that group, I'm glad I know how to give respect and I'm glad that I don't have to feel guilty about hurting others by calling them ugly or stupid or whatever.

I'm glad I'm part of that small group of people that actually tries to be respectful in this cruel, cold world.

Love and Hate, involved in an Eternal War since the beginning of times.
Love and Hate, constantly fighting to gain control over the heart.
Love and Hate, always on the battlefield as foes, but sometimes they laid down their weapons for a while and fought together as allies.
Love would be in control for a while and then Love would casually step aside so Hate could take its place and make the heart crumble a bit, more and more with every type of foul play by the two.
Love and hate, Right and Wrong, Light and Darkness, normally each other's foes, but occassionally each other's allies.

Money can be your best friend if you have it, yet it can also destroy everything you have.
Money can buy you anything you like, but at the same time the 'hunt' for money and things can, like drugs, consume you and change you.
It can cause you to push away everyone close to you and it can form a paper money wall around you that stops anyone from getting through.
Money can buy you a lot,  but it can't buy you love and respect for who you are, which seems to be missing in this so called 'united world'.

Writing, the mouth that speaks the words for you.
Writing, the bridge over the gap to get words across.
Writing, the boat to sail over the sea of silence.
Writing, the opportunity to let your heart do the talking.
Writing, the only thing to which you can truly say "Actions speak louder than words."

Me, a miserable boy, just roaming this world, cloaked in a cape of sadness and negativity.
Me, nothing more than just a spec of dust.
Me, sitting here, being the failure I am.
I'm so lonely...yet not alone, cause you came into my life.
We only talk on HP, but I already consider you a close friend.
You care about me, you are there for me in times of sadness.
To you, and to everyone else who (silently) cares about me, I wanna say: Thank you for keeping the knife away from my wrists...

There I am, trapped in a cage of depression and negativity, like a parrot kept as a pet, nowhere to go, unable to live life like I should. I'm thinking back to the times before I was locked in this cage, enjoying life and being happy. Now, the only thought on my mind is: "Somebody please unlock this cage and make me feel it once again, my freedom"

Her lips are sealed together. Her voice is hidden away inside, waiting to burst through the shame that seals her lips like superglue. Her shoulders are hanging down, like the twigs of a willow. Her eyes are white waterballoons, that are ready to burst. Her hands are folded together, like the only person she trusts, is herself. I can see that she wants someone that will remove the superglue, pop the balloons and who will unfold her hands and guide her down this road, taking a right turn at the end, towards happiness

One of the first hot daye this summer. People enjoying the beautiful weather. Children playing in the streets. People walking around in a happy mood and with smiles on their. Yet, there I am. I don't enjoy the nice weather. I feel cold and I'm wrapped in a blanket of sadness and loneliness, with a few patches of despair. In my head, it's just another rainy day. If only someone would take the time to bring some sunshine into my day...

You and I, converged as one.
You and I, connect by a (seemingly) unbreakable.
You and I, forever till the end of time, or so it seemed.
Years of friendship, washed away by that one day. That one moment on which our friendship was reduced to being acquaintances.
We've known eachother for years, yet, on that moment, we showed sides that neither one of us has ever seen.
I showed an evil side, and I'm sorry.

You, the one I wanted to run away with.
I, well, what's there to say? I ****** up again, like I always do...I'm just a failure...
For everything I've ever done wrong...I'm sorry...

Baby girl, I'm here for you.
Baby girl, I'm here to help.

If you have problems, don't hesitate to come to me. My arms are open wide, my ears wide open.
I will be there for you whenever I can, if only you'd accept that you can't do it alone, and accept help from this miserable man.

The heart, a powerful thing, yet so fragile. It's capable of loving hundreds of people, it can cause forgiveness and compassion. Yet, it only takes 1 simple word to break that powerful thing into thousands of pieces, causing millions of tears to be shed.

Home, a place of your own.
A place where you don't have to worry about others.
A place where you're in charge of what happens.

Home, a safe haven.
A place to run to if you're scared or upset or anything.
A place that offers shelter from the evil that lurks outside.

Home, the base of your life.
A place where you take care of things.
A place where you go to sleep every night and wake up every morning.

Home, it can be big, it can be small, but what really matters is that you can say "Home, sweet home".

There she walks, that girl.
There she talks, that girl.
There she goes around, keeping up the appearance that everything's okay, but as I look into her eyes, I see the pain she suffers from and I see the tears she tries to hold back. Whenever she smiles, I can read the despair from her face. Whenever she talks, I can hear the shout for help in her voice. Me and her might not look the same, but on the inside, we're perfect twins.

I see you sitting there, your hair waving in the wind like the leaves, your eyes sparkling like the water's surface, your smile so illumating that it lights up even the darkest of times.

Whenever I see you, it's as if time comes to a stand-still, as if I get surrounded by a brick box with a hole just big enough so that it only focuses on you. Whenever I hear you, your voice echoes through my head.

I know I'm just some guy to you, but I want you to know that you are the music  that lacked in this concert known as life.

Why?
Why is it so hard for people to keep things simple?
Why is it so hard to just take the known roads, instead of taking undiscovered paths?
Why is it so easy to do difficult things, and so difficult to do easy things?

I ask myself these questions several times, and it just seems like there's no answer to any of them.

If only people could just take time to explore the simple, known things and avoid difficulties, then maybe, just maybe this world wouldn't be this messed up place....

I'm always there for people, yet no one sees me. To everyone I'm just a piece of thin air, to some maybe even a waste of space.

I always try to help, yet no one appreciates it. Everyone rejects any form of help I offer, some even reject me.

Some people say they're lonely but not alone...well, I'd be a happy guy if I could say that too.

I've found you after years of total silence. We immediately resumed our lives together as if we were never separated. Happiness ruled our friendship, until that one day...that one day on which your entire was knocked out by a devastating hit of depression and sadness. Now, all I do is try to make you feel better, and even though I do my best, you act like I'm the bad guy, like I'm the one that knocked you out. I just want you to look me in the eyes and say those 2 beautiful words: Thank you...

This moment has come again, this moment of complete emptiness.
First my head was full of thoughts and ideas and inspiration, and now..... everything's disappeared, ****** away in a vacuum cleaner.

This moment has come again, this moment in which my life is an empty void, a dark hole.

Why? Why can't I have someone in my life to fill the void?

What have I done to deserve this?

Please...make it stop....

It's not enough to say "I'm perfect", it's perfect to say "I'm enough"