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MissNeona Jun 2021
Oh my girl
I know it feels so rough
broken bones and tender bruises
aint no bluff

You're doing more than you know
it's just starting to show
no time to blow it
nor up.
get down.
with what is
you always knew it wouldnt' be easy
keep going, you're dancing, flowin' grliding, stop slidin'

like water, move like this. Ignore what's that?
Eyes on the road, trees = SMACK!

simplify it if you gotta
as long as they eye is on the prize and out of the gutter
the house was set ablaze long ago
the foof was on fire and were were meant to let it burn

we don't got clean water anymore.
trophies in the junkyard
and the downtrodden are no longer bards.
the songs got scripted a long time ago

voices, minds, and songbirds are all in tow
she resembles, ensembles have been bought and paid for
the tune is made of ichor and rot, played for us, siren songed us
lured into the depths of self.

tongues caught by cats and all in knots
tunes whistled through the air
through crevaces and cracks
even the stones began to sing
when the world went so out of whack

birds changing staccato beats
maybe ends were met

echoing new words through
the halls and words back to struts
sparrows and robins, the hood and new tweets
MissNeona Sep 2014
everything is disconnected
it all feels so strange
whenever I'm close to coming
I've found you already gone
sometimes i would bleed extra to make sure i still bled blood
MissNeona Jan 2021
I  hate that you know your cards so well,
left with not more than to sit  and dwell...

on the woes and the pains that makes the inflammation swell  
and the secrets you choose to no longer tell.

I hate that you know your  cards so well,
the metagame structure, the moves and spells.

Stories  from NPCs, the canon and plays,
leaving you locked into the old ways.  

Playing tapped out hands, old janky tricks...
with  a table flip as the only advisable fix.
MissNeona Apr 2017
So I found out that if I am feeling less than appealing,
covering myself in ingredients like coconut oil, honey and coffee and sending nudes to cutie chubby bois makes me feel better.

Yum! I just wanted to be delicious.
MissNeona Sep 2014
I have my own theory of strings,
I'm searching for things that resonate

Character is an exercise in humility,
Know yourself, the rhythm and flows

Are you on this wavelength?
What's your frequency?
White noise is everywhere.
but you cannot stop the signal.
the hertz, they hit so close to ohm.

I found you. Tried to ground you.
I knew we would feel sparks.
I seem so direct, the current is strong.
MissNeona Feb 2021
It's been really quiet in my space...
The cat does his best.
I haven't been telling people the real heavy stuff.
Cause I don't want to. And I don't have to. And it never. ******. Helps.
But when I hear the heavy of others, somes I end up bawling until I can't breathe... and yeah, it's getting it out, but it comes back... so, right now? I choose to fight through it.
I choose to appreciate the space I have to cry until I can't breathe.
I choose to appreciate the fact that nobody sees me when I don't get out of bed well, or for days, or if I whimper all the hours between it.
I am appreciative that I can fall apart in this quietness for a while.
Because I have been all alone... for most of this entire pandemic.
I appreciate that nobody has seen my breakdowns.
My questions.
I am trying to appreciate this time of grieving.
Because who else could love this level of breakdown?
I never had anyone before who could comfortably sit through this with me.
Not even me.
Until now.
Now I love my breakdown, because nobody else could.
She doesn't need to be attended to. She doesnt want to be saved from the tower anymore.
She wants to sit here, and love herself for crying.
Crying without having to he seen.
Crying without having to be heard.
Crying is the absolute most badass thing I can do with this.
Take the rage, the whoa, self-pity, fear of fractalizaton and terror of the unknown.
I got up to here... having major symptoms of chiari formation, theough multiple sockets being subluxed and dislocated (fixing them myself, too)... waking up three mornings in a row... body releasing on itself and nobody around to clean up my messes and the cats death throws but myself.
I am here for these babies.
Because who else could see?
We aren't against anyone, just for ourselves.
But self advocacy is hard when you've allowed yourself to tell you you are weak, lesser, not equal to... everyone around you.
Allowing my needs to fade and go unseen so I wasn't a burden on anyone else... cause I was too much of a burden to myself.
This is my Ode to Self-Love
I am a badass warrior.
Because nobody could see nor save me from a tower of my own creation.
And when the skies cracked and the cat began to falter it was like pathateic fallacy.
I get back off the wall when I stumble into it.
I laugh when my body spasms and something falls cause it has to be funny.
When the pressures of the world make me crumble, I keep getting back up... not because of any reason other than.. nobody else can or would.
My ode to self love is a mark of a warrior because I never felt safe enough to share my issues cause sometimes I could make even therapists cry...
About 5-6 years ago I realized I was teaching the teachers... talking profession with the professionals and surprising so many people.
I wanted to understand everything and everyone so I could understand why I was so weird.
Turns out my health struggles I joked were like a bill Murray sighting, "Nobody will ever believe you."
So I had to see, believe in, and take care of myself (as much as possible).
My ode to self love.
The hardest one to love.
The toughest love.
Cause it showed me the easy way was rarely the best way.
That suffering merely means to undergo.
And that we are all playing g the game of life.
There are no manuals.
There's no walkthroughs.
There is no 'you', only me, we, us everything and nothing and ... we are all in this together.
And the only thing I can ever ask another is that they take care of their circus of cells in the way that only they know, and I am cheerleading supporting rooting for and fighting for the inter child inside of everyone around me.
Cause you give me life.
You give me strength.
You give me hope.
You give me love.
You give me faith.
You give me inspiration to keep going on.
You allowed me to see me past the circus of cells and beyond.
And I can't wait for your ode to self, too.
I love you.
Thank you.
Who else could fight the warrior's battle? Only you ♡
MissNeona Sep 2014
sometimes I feel our love is best left to theory
MissNeona Sep 2014
one a day until they all go away
that is how this mean girl plays
them hips, that swagger,
with ******* and moans,
drag-assing with pathetic groans
suspend not, your disbelief,
I don't need you to believe in me,
I'm tried, tested, true,
Been through the thick of it,
Came out, through and through,
I don't need no guff, no trouble,
No one standing in my way,
I want my adventure,
to say what I say.
MissNeona Jan 2016
So she danced like the world was going out of style,

and in her mind, it was.

it was the beginning of some ending of just the perfect story,

and falling away into the vibrations was her only recourse

to close the chapter and transition into the next

the happy blurr of sound and motion

white noise tingling up her spine

pains fading into a pleasurable numbness

there is nothing left but the bass and the beat

the sway of  bodies and the shuffle of feet
MissNeona Oct 2021
Waking up just as tired as I am going to sleep.
I hope you speak up, peep.
Cause the wolves are counting sheep.
Lined up, looking good to eat.
They're our friends, this won't be cheap.
It's time for the void, quantum leap.
MissNeona Sep 2014
I know my strengths and weaknesses, I can articulate them to another, and I understand when people can't handle me, even if they love me to bits, I know how I want to feel loved and what I need to be happy and I will search for that.
MissNeona Apr 2020
An ex once told me he'd murdered before,
and not all the bodies had been found,
To which I retorted, "Don't threaten ME with a good time -
I can't wait to be six feet underground."
MissNeona Nov 2021
Meet the maker inside
I'm sure you'll find
inside you just as any other
the holy spirit resides

why does a spirited one
have to go ghosting around for others
if she's too invisitble to be seen anyhow
when nobody ex-spectres the un-ex-spectered

she rarely gets invited out either
when she can be so scary and goes boo

most just want to put their ***** in the holy
'cause she's been worn through
but what they don't see is that anyone else
could be just as shiny, too.

Did that so long that she became a ghost in tthe streets, the sheets, and to her too.
So, what else is a poor ghost to do?
MissNeona Sep 2014
On the inside I'm still that dumb kid who hugs animals too tight.
MissNeona Sep 2021
I thought it was an agreement we made
to suffer through - even when we were worn thru
MissNeona Jan 2021
Not everyone knows
what shakes in between atoms
likely some do here

it's a nifty thing
speaking in a sort of code
filled with beat and flow

loving riddles and rhymes
palindromes and the wordplay
when I'm challenged I speak

truth comes in between
what is and what could have been
it's hard to have voice

all of the vibrations
abracadabra and all
intention is everything

taking solace in
knowing what is meant for me
will appear when needed

the aether speaks softly
for those who dare to listen
to the spaces in between
MissNeona Sep 2014
I'm withered and weathered.
In a tower of my own creation
toy
MissNeona Jun 2021
toy
there's a flipside to your rhyme
we choose the side we acknowledge with time
see that when we mainifest our curses
it's what we think we deserve - what's yearns in
we be really out here manifesting our wants
don't be there with your demons in taunts
be joy, be a boy,
no coytoyin'
MissNeona Sep 2014
outside squirrel kitty treat
MissNeona Sep 2014
Typing with thumbs; tiny touchscreens.
MissNeona Apr 2021
If you decide to stand up for hate instead of help then I believe you have a lot of growth to engage with.

I love the future. I love our potential.

I believe that good hearts will win the day, and I believe in better ways than passing on pain.

I love our ability to grow when we see the lessons but don't refeel the pain of the situation.

We twist memories in our mind to protect ourselves, but we can learn the real lessons if we listen with loving awareness.

I am trying to be better, please join me when you're ready

No rush.
MissNeona May 2022
Creativity draws interesting perspective and sometimes if you turn things around you can find art in the upside down
MissNeona Dec 2021
volcanoes in la palma - the hands of the deities
... The Disturbance Storm Time Index sounds like a great song name.. but kinda scary for a world phenom.
what if pathetic fallacy was the quantum effect of emotions on a collective consciousness?
MissNeona Jul 2021
I think I'm hilarious
you're just jealous
and to others you call me
overzealous

but you know I'm right
and to avoid being wrong
singing harder, instead just change
the song

you're going to be fine
it's just your time
to finally wisen up and
learn to rhyme

the song is more fun
when we sing along
even if the words
always come out wrong

a little bit of happiness
and a lot more patience
maybe can save this ****
instead of having to change stations
MissNeona Oct 2020
Looking for the thing you lack usually means you ignore who's got your back
MissNeona May 2021
I like being useful, having fun, learning, playing, etc.
having a body/being human/making decisions/thinking/remembering meh
not into it
MissNeona Aug 2021
Mother - mater - the matter we're made from, Father - pater - the pattern we've been paved from, the son, the sun, the life you were given, and the holy spirit, the whisper in your ear, where faith keeps on living.. then you come in, the soul of the set, learning, growing, youing
MissNeona Jun 2022
Magnetar from the milky way
across our vast galaxy
carried with frequency
like lingams shook with spinning heat
detoxify from minds to feet
create the vortex, enliven the waters
Pray to the heavens, and our holy vvader
The mirror mind, and the eyes
plays tricks when judging the u-n-i
verse came first, aether was there
Is it time for the solar flare?
What is this, truth or dare?
Calling for a pheonix, rare.
Earnestly, we're laid bare
MissNeona Nov 2020
Why dont you just do what you can't so I don't have to see you suffer? Says the lover to the other.
MissNeona Apr 2021
hindsight being 20/20 we now know the learnings that we get from allowing male chauvin-ist pigs to make rules for others, get away with more than their share, and the issues of figureheads for the masses. We are doing better after this day, this is the upswing. Thanks for you.

WE are better now, we are smarter now, we take our learnings forward, we love with our fullest selves, and we. GET. BETTER.
This is not shame, this is guilt, we learn from mistakes.... and we believe in rehabilitation.

Swarm is forever.

Only some cops are bad now that we'll have the ability to decipher who can deal with the call of duty and who cannot.
MissNeona Mar 2022
Eiheurmentated - gleerage

Jahous - yaos

Eiayeeae

Tiiyaee

Teiyaruh

Maiyeae
MissNeona Jun 2021
Be the author
Wrote the story
For the glory
Else be boring

Or dragged through
Mucky sinews
Of the blackened blue
Of fish swiming through

Tentacled masses
Hidden crevaces
Idle trances
Trumpet blassin'
MissNeona Oct 2021
Say goodbye to the old, and in with the new.
We suffered and won, our timelines, we drew.
We survived the fall, for one and for all.
Now Terra Nova calls - our court filled with *****.
See what we can do, then do what we must.
This is how we survive the boom without bust.
MissNeona Sep 2014
at least pickles are cheaper than flowers
MissNeona Oct 2021
Nah, Ma'... Stay, let's talk a while
About how you took a little child
Raised that boy up into a man,
Who before you, proudly stands.

Seeing the other as his equal,
Knowing that good movies get their sequel,
And epic hero's tales get to see quill
'cause fans request the prequel
MissNeona Jan 2016
You can't undo it.
No, you can't go back
Let's just pretend
That we're on the right track
MissNeona Sep 2014
more insulting as a presence,

it is all feeling,
the offensive defendant,

moving towards something,
perpetuated with intention,

miscalculate inertia,
the unfortunate ricochet,

the inner eye once turned.
she still sees nothing inside,

only I remain,

but it's still lonely.
MissNeona Sep 2014
You're starting now.

Actually, it's not a start or a stop,
it's a continuous progression.
against the continuously aging body you've been granted,

they say death isn't the end,
so, learn, my child, learn and grow,

figure your **** out, and apply what you know,

speak from the heart,
only be an upstart,
when you know that the flows got to go,

figure out what's important,
and how to keep going,

retain those you know are worth it,
discard those that do you only damage,

it is time, my love,
it's time to go,
you've been working so hard for this,
it shows,

you're worn and ragged,
weathered and torn,

by this point in time,
by life, you feel scorned

Everything you do now goes back into the universe,

Explore the concepts,
connect the dots,

Develop the ideas,
before your brain rots,

Each body you're given,
the collection of souls,

Keep perpetuating ideals,
only deity knows,

We're moving towards something huge,
dividing,
winding,
and expectantly wooed,

by the need to feel special,
that white picket fence,

Everyone is hungry for something they miss,
Find it,
don't get it,
keep yourself chasing,

Everyone knows horses are great for racing,

What's your carrot? What's your sign?

How can I capture, enrapture your mind?
MissNeona Nov 2020
My version of this is the ole 6 to 1...
If I catch myself saying something negative about myself I have to compliment sandwich the eff out of myself.
For instance, today...
"I can't believe you slept pretty much the whole day away..."
Is a negative I woke up with, so, adding a minimum of 6 positive buffers to keep my mind aligned to success.
"You deserved the rest for all the stress."
"You are likely needed a longer sleep since you deny yourself it regularly."
"Yesterday you did two loads of dishes, rearranged furniture, worked on a bunch of projects and connected with many people."
"You are in the process of resetting subluxed shoulderblades."
"Ehlers Danlos Syndrome makes you into an athlete who needs to recoup energy."
"It is Saturday, have a great weekend, so what you can, but don't ever stop."
"Rest time and active work time are valued the same."
"If I get up now and start the day, there's still time."

Turns out, if you don't want to have to think about how to "fix" the one negative... you start being more positive generally.
And that is a kindness we all deserve.
Also, its scientifically proven to be more effective than criticism. So, are you being mean to yourself cause you actually want to get stuff done or because you're addicted to thinking you're a ****** human?
You're a great human.
Thanks for trying to be better. ♡
MissNeona May 2016
thought you would be here by now,

It feels like eternities and eons are twisting around in my stomach,

It's like I can feel you coming to me,
Through space and time on your journey,

Through the aether and the unknown
I feel your breath in the wind,
Your sight in the light

Where are you?
Where are you?

The mist is in the way,
The shadows feel here to stay.

Can you hear me?
Can you feel me?

More hopes dim each day,
When my head is down to lay


It gets harder and harder without you here,
I thought you would be with me
I expected these battles to be fought by your side,
shoulder to shoulder,
partners in vibe,

I can't see you,
or touch you,
or tell you my love,

The battles that I am winning don't feel like enough.


I am sick of delay,
of hopes and dreams.

I need this actualized,
lest all my feels, be realized,
I am terrified, locked in my place.

But I know,
what's left is breaking the daze and the fog I applied to the mind...

When after so many search attempts,
there was no you to find.

I am gathering my things,
paying my dues.
Processing my mind,
that was reduced to mere fumes.

I will go on my way,
with my strength through the darkness.

I know the last trials will seem like the hardest.

I am going to go where my soul finds song,
and maybe that's where you and I belong.
MissNeona Sep 2014
I thought I saw the path
but I got all turned about
near the fork in the road
such a travesty, I'm lost
MissNeona Feb 2016
You're left in awe
of the majesty of it all
But I'm just a craterous soul
a gigantic gaping hole
In remain from projectiles before
A knowing eye will abhor.
MissNeona Sep 2021
How you win big! Healing, growth. Quick successes. Find the helpers, and amplify their efforts. Manifest strength. Clear out he old. Get better regulated with behavioural gold. Continue on the path, no suffering on suffering. Good catharsis. Continued betterment. Protect aether.
MissNeona Sep 2014
I wanted to tell you a story
To spill it out all before you
So you could put it back together
in a way it would all make sense
In the way I know only you can do
I know you, you know me,
How can it be, do you see?
I know you do, it's so true
You speak to my soul, you do.
MissNeona Sep 2014
I've been filled to the brim for so long,
Watch out, don't shake the baby,
any sort of jostling will cause it all to spill,
do you really want to see the tears?
"It's going to swish and swash like that til it gets emptied" he said,
Oh darling, don't make waves, no,
No darling, don't make waves, oh.
MissNeona Feb 2021
The Lady of the Lake
Be the Goddess of the Sea
All this talk of the he over she?
is just Blarney! ****** the girls - made them laughing stocks
They said the siren song led men upon the rocks,
And that the little mermaid was just a fish in the sea who lost the voice for talks-
but when fish started to fly they called them birds harpies - and banshees!
Known for their shrieks, eeeeeeeeee~

Ban-shee-from power, will you?
Making monarchs from kings
But trapping princesses in towers
Calling them dragons to protect the treasures.
But you can’t ex-the-caliber of how the caged bird sings

It comes in waves - the ebbs and flows of rage
3 - 6 - 9 - 13
The ripples and coreolis flow of the fibonacci
The coming of months - in this new age
A of new moons and returned goddesses;
And that which had always been

Hope’s Chest and Pandora’s Box
Divine design isn’t but seed from *****
Calling ******* weak - but ***** strong?
Maybe marijuana isn’t the pipe dream; but ding! The ****.

I love Lucy; The devilish flower
Ladies love Lililies and women in power.
The wild roses will always grow in bushes
Sometimes thorns are built to avoid pushes

Relinquished power to the lords of sands and time.
It took me a while to hear a visual sign
Why can kings stand alone?
When Queens yield more potency?

Was it man or product overboard in Boston -
That’s may spill the real Liber’s Tea

Turn the wines back to water
Gaia returned from the pater.
We all knew grapes were a soft seed
But when the serpent is vilified
Save for the one who wears the pants -
We knew the apple wasn’t eaten or given
But something definitely was swallowed

I have a hard time believing that
A god of wine and revelry
Would let a woman with a sword
And the torch
Stand in the way of his libations
And ****** treats

Adam always had the apple
And a trouser snake
The Victor tells to story
Flipping the script each time
Keeps ouroboros on the next take

Pom-e-granite ain’t quite an apple
But maybe we we take words for granted
Abracadabra becomes a joke
And the rest is in sight, just planted…  
Upside down,
spun around
groundhogs day
opposite day

What even day?
What's to say - they changed the calendar .... wha over a millenia?
Instinct knows whats can be found
when we start first with self and ground...
MissNeona Sep 2014
Raise structure
What should I expect to recieve in comission per week
Comission rate
Coming back for a visit within the month
Minimum Monthly Takehome/First paycheque
Day leaving, day returning.
Evening of the 23rd
MissNeona Nov 2020
while the stock TING market rides high they be stuffing the tides down our throats like we're sock puppets
MissNeona Apr 2021
it all is, has been and will be, we must show up with our males and females in balance in each moment we can.... internally first. I hope as a female outward, your male innards are better than anyone who presents male outwardly.
We made them act "manly" for us for a long time, when the feminine insides in roughened exteriors ended up making mistepps out of heavy expectations... then we just .. made excuses for bad behaviour, and self-hatred applied to justify the swings....
when internally we're in charge of the balancings.

I feel like you'll like that, too.

My writings are coming out weird and faster now

I've been picturing the universal balancing points.

like what if whenever someone showed up "too needy" "too Much" "too this" --- was just the balancing point.
of what I was hiding.

since we're all mostly projectionists. so.... I'm trying to show up more balanced.

just to see... my friend likened it to the stillness that reflects...

mirror surface
MissNeona Sep 2020
You never needed anyone to understand before - why start caring now?
You'll never win over the haters
and you'll lose your lovers,
trying to fit into someone else's mold.
Girl, do what you love to do,
Say what you feel is true.
As long as you learned as you grew.
Babe, you do you.
Yeah, you do you.

Did you find a goal or game?
Your claim to fame or the dance and swerve of lanes?
You're the only one who has been with yourself through all the moments of the day.
If you have yet to figure out your way - there is nobody to blame.
Babe, you do you.
Yeah, you do you.
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