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Dec 2019 · 145
presence
freakysmind Dec 2019
Everything i write about is from the past
all the hurt and pain has already passed
look forward to tomorrow live for the present
those dark days i shall always feel its presence
Dec 2019 · 153
grasping
freakysmind Dec 2019
why do i hold onto things that aren't there?
i still can't figure out how to grab thin air
deep down i feel something is there
not knowing what it is but knowing it cares
Sep 2018 · 177
mam
freakysmind Sep 2018
mam
the biggest part of my heart has been taken away from me,
its left a space so vast and scarily empty,
left my father so emotionally drained,
he's just lost his wife and oldest friend, we will make it because you showed us how to stay strong even in the roughest days,
i want my mam back is what I'm trying to say.
i love you, you made me who i am today,
you now reside in paradise,
but save me a place when its my time stay,
mam.... i think about you everyday.
Sep 2018 · 157
battle of thoughts
freakysmind Sep 2018
Recently I've been fighting depression,
I learned it's as dangerous of all known weapons,
It made me question everything i am,
It made me feel less of a man,
self inflicted doubts of feeling worthless,
I let myself cry just so it hurts less
I've been to the bottom before but could always see the top,
But this time i went straight through and i didn't stop,
i was alone floating in a space of hurt,

i couldn't see what i was fighting
But i felt how deep they cut.
Aug 2018 · 162
Balanced Thoughts
freakysmind Aug 2018
i have inner power
it keeps me together in my darkest hours.
never afraid to feel that thought
i only write about my saddest thoughts.
now i can see the sun light shining through on the darkest days
luckily those rain drops can clear all those tears away.
it's ok i have a smile today
learned that's just the way the universe plays.
making me stronger and wiser every day.
i never forget but let that stress just float away
I've found myself again time to live for the day

so if you read this SMILE :) everything is going to be ok.
an actual happy one in a weird way from me this time
Aug 2018 · 544
realistic dreams
freakysmind Aug 2018
i had a lucid dream last night
it felt so real i hated the sight
it created tears i could not fight
i guess being alone is now my life
close my heart turn off that light
now afraid to close my eyes
incase i see those sights
Aug 2018 · 168
still fighting
freakysmind Aug 2018
the servitude of masters is something i will never abide by.
they serve up lies upon lies while looking in your eyes and then watch you die slow.
the system is designed so we believe we're winning.
take our humanity and our rights then they get upset when we try living.
then they make us fight for what we should already naturally have.
don't tell me I'm overreacting
when the proof is there in there actions.
see the devil when you remove there masks
then they just look at you and laugh.
Aug 2018 · 168
that glowing light
freakysmind Aug 2018
im feeling better, but not fully,
these sad emotions won't stop pulling.
but every day there's a light getting brighter,
all i know is i have to fight to get there,
the fight with life isn't fair,
but you are that breath of fresh air
when i felt i couldn't breathe,
so in this i need to express how i feel
distance is the killer
but that won't stop me
i know you want me
when i don't want me.
Mar 2018 · 183
heartstrings
freakysmind Mar 2018
All alone in a heartless world
Innocents lost in the heart of wars
Tears falling from a little childs face
Bombs falling like the stars
leaving no trace
Except on the innocents face while there diggin through the ruble that was once there place
Only to reveal there loved ones face
what a ****** up place we live in
not one **** by OUR GOVERNMENTS given.
Mar 2018 · 210
pieces
freakysmind Mar 2018
My heart beats for love and peace
But when the peace is in pieces
The love just drifts away
We grasp on to them so tightly
We try and make them stay
But somebody doesn't like them and takes them all away
Mar 2018 · 151
reflected
freakysmind Mar 2018
the reflections i see
are not of me
they are of thee
misguided souls
misplaced goals
the persuit of happiness
when its found within those woes
weighed down broken in some parts
not knowing if one day it'll fall to pieces
broken by the fear of no sequel.
Mar 2018 · 159
rose t(a)inted
freakysmind Mar 2018
like a rose in the wind
petals part, flow and ascend
each petal representing a pain you can't mend
but so captivating others watch
as you become a lonely stem
while your waiting for your soul to mend
and return to that embrace again.
Mar 2018 · 141
Untitled
freakysmind Mar 2018
perceptions of reality
limitations of gravity
watching the moon rise
watching a bird fly backwards
purple suns
green moons
black seas
surfing the clouds
dreams or reality i can't tell which one
so let me chill under my purple sun
Mar 2018 · 140
love fear fear love
freakysmind Mar 2018
I see so far
i forget what's near
stuck in between love & fear
i love the fear
i fear the love
so lost in what to do when given some
its like nectar from the gods
it engulfs my soul
that of which im unworthy to behold
fighting demons i keep so near
they whisper so deeply "we plan on staying here"
oh sweet love why do i fear?
Mar 2018 · 153
do you know?
freakysmind Mar 2018
remember who you are
not who they want you to be
remember remember keep telling yourself I'm me
they always look down
but i keep looking up
i use the stars to guide me
while they keep getting stuck
they try to be something there not        
not knowing who they are                      
i know who i am
but do they know who they are?
Oct 2017 · 179
words
freakysmind Oct 2017
i just want you too see me
i don't want you to be with me
they say actions speak louder than words
but words are powerful believe me
so be careful how you speak
i won't always have the answers
but i will always answer if you need to speak.
random one
Oct 2017 · 178
illusions
freakysmind Oct 2017
illusions of innocence
smoke and mirrors
to hide the truth of ones true sinning
often left wondering from the start to ending
is it real or is it just pretending?
show me what i want
I'll want what you show
your illusion of innocence
is never needed though
Oct 2017 · 213
I don't know... I'm afraid
freakysmind Oct 2017
To afraid to close my eyes,
To afraid to sleep
To afraid to let my memories in
I'm afraid I'll get too deep

I don't know who i am
I don't know who you are
But can you save me before i go too far?
Far from safety far to far
I just want to rise up and express my heart
Oct 2017 · 164
forgotten
freakysmind Oct 2017
Every girl I meet looks just like you
But then i realise that girl is not you
I got you out of my mind too forget you
But my heart must of forgot too.
Oct 2017 · 176
someone
freakysmind Oct 2017
Friendship in strangers
finding solice in the comfort of the unknown
but the unknown can be a place called home
connections, reflections of troubles shared
comfort in knowing that a stranger cares
stopping the scars from turning into nightmares
friendship of strangers.......
something you shouldn't fear
Oct 2017 · 207
trapped
freakysmind Oct 2017
i feel like a man in a bubble
floating in the ocean
crashing and rolling
bouncing and hoping
that i find solid ground
scream so loud but it blocks all sound
I'm just a man in a bubble hoping to be found.
Oct 2017 · 155
Untitled
freakysmind Oct 2017
I woke up to the sound of the sun
When it rose it rose like the sound of a gun
The Particals of light from the rays they come
Illuminate the path i must not stray from.
The riddles i think are the riddles of life
When lost in the dark it can bring forth so much light
Today i woke to the sound of the sun
and learned each one of us is an infinite one.
Oct 2017 · 311
Unknown
freakysmind Oct 2017
Why does my heart feel so empty?
When its so full with love
Its like cupid has punched me with no gloves
While i sit and wait
for what is to come.
Just too ignite my heart one more time like the burning sun.
with no notion of where these feelings come from.
Just so one day I can share my love with someone.
Oct 2017 · 205
visualize
freakysmind Oct 2017
My life, my mind maybe a trip through time
A spiders web a maze with no time
Thats the best way too describe my mind
Often thinking but never taught
I crawl through life I never walk
I imagine all the storys and music I hear
I see it all so perfectly clear
like a kaleidoscope of colour
But every colour I can hear
Visualize every story as if i was there
Im proud to be me so crazy and weird
I see the world so different but oh so clear
Thinking to myself am i really from here?
When everyone is trapped in there own fear
I just drift in my own space...... a long way from here.
Oct 2017 · 409
unfounded
freakysmind Oct 2017
I have this song in my heart
Thats so perfectly clear
But when I try to do it
Its so painfully never near
It brings forth emotions
And removes all my fears.

it tells a different story
with Every kick of a drum
The song of my soul
That echos in my heart
The only thing keeping it from falling apart
Also brings forth happiness
That hits like a spark
Turns all too light that was once shrouded in dark
Feels like im on a cloud everywhere I walk
Always with a laugh or a smile
I'll just let the music talk.

— The End —