Coupled with cheap beer and cigarettes.
Refined to seldom notions unabridged.
Placed upon park benches, latent among nature's silhouette.

Coupled with gloom and recollective though.
Strings of the heart tattered.
Memory conceived, derived of past affair.

I slept easier knowing I had you at my side, I guess the point I'm trying to get across is that I don't want you to go...
I  wore us like the heart on my sleeve and I can't sleep at night knowing it's gone...
I wish it had never left. I wish you never left. I'll hold on to you, until time takes me.

It began at a young age.
The stillness of a room, beckoning.
Reflecting the essence of an expensive solitaire.
Even though ephemeral, quite ravishing in thought.

It began at a young age.
Watching them quarrel day in and day out.
Becoming observant of the atrocity seen as their marriage.
Aware of the covert countenance among them.

It began at a young age.
Presented the embodiment atop later years.
Transitory associations, paired with dissociation.
The distal end on a plain, lay I.

My own stability fragile,
frail like flower petals.
Simple things break me, and I never recover. I learn to move on, but hold on to memory, an iron clasp, on each and every scene, reflecting in though, so deep, each memory.
Looking back, nothing I'd change. Looking back, it stays the same. You lose more hope, as days pass by, and lose yourself finding security.
Observation proves theory, misery loves company, and the whole ship sinks. Observation proves theory, people dont change, they all stay the same, with only a new age.
Exposure to illness, like atomic bombs, you're torn apart and never forget, the feeling, the pain, the sorrow, the waves of inadequate thought, you never forget. You hold on, to each piece, from that movie scene, embedded in your mind, losing track of life, losing track of time.

She was much older than I.
Her backstory was much unknown to me, and it didn't matter at all,
what mattered was that she noticed my existence, the fact she's going out of her way to take a chance at something that could either be the biggest mistake of her life or something that could put a smile on her face for the last bits of her existence. It's a beautiful thing to see someone come out of their shell for another, even the slightest bit, and to see her do such a thing for a person like me was unbelievable. Speaking to me as if she cared about what I had to say and not just letting it go in one ear and out the other, but actually taking my words and holding onto them, giving me the light of day. Her insides are as beautiful as she is and the head that rests upon her shoulders is a gift to mankind itself. She is the epitome of unique and the essence of remarkable. A keen interest in her is all I've come to assume, drawn like a moth to a flame, the passion I hold onto for this individual is extravagance alone. She's what I've come to think of before I fall asleep, and the thought that becomes present in an unannounced manner. She's grown to be apart of my daily routine, and someone I'd like to keep around.

Perfezione Dolce

I don't get on here to read what others write, i'll be the first to admit it in all honesty. I don't get on here to post and expect people to see what I write, and I'm not trying to make it as some poet. I am here to vent, to look for someone who can help, to help myself as well, this is my space where I can put my feelings into the open and nobody say a word about them. I love it endlessly. I believe this community is a beautiful one, so thank you for letting me open up here.

I'm so sick of living in the eyes of other people.
It's empty doing so,  
and even worse not knowing who I am.
Sure, I can name a few qualities,
but where does the real me lie?
Where does the days in and out of putting up with everything play a role?
I'm sick of my shortcomings being brought up by others,
spending endless nights worrying about adequacy,
when in reality my thought was the only one to matter.
Even with this realization though,
I can't begin to fathom the change in mindset,
I can't begin to breathe on my own,
I don't know how and I need help.
This world doesn't revolve around me and I know,
I have to make my own way here,
But can someone help me out?
Can someone teach me without making me hate myself more?
Can someone give me a ******* chance for once?
I'm sick,
I'm tired,
my entirety aches endlessly.
Someone ******* help me here,
someone put time into me just as I've put time into others,
I'm so tired of being on the fire.